Recent content by howtobealone

Are there any activities that you like to do besides reading? It seems like you may be setting up a false dichotomy between staying in and reading by yourself and going to a club you don't enjoy. You could see if there are any meetups for activities that you enjoy, that's a good way to meet...

I'm sorry to hear that you're having such difficulties; I've had my share of them too, but it sounds like you're in a lot of anguish. You might consider talking to a doctor about medication and therapy. But I think progress mostly comes from forcing yourself to talk with other people. Talk to...

That depends on how you define realistic. :) I'd love to have some of my health issues cleared up, insomnia, sinusitis, digestive issues. I feel like my happiness would significantly jump if those issues were resolved. But is that like saying I wish I could be 6'2"? I guess what I'd like is...

I wonder how much of happiness is genetic predisposition and how much of it is circumstances. Not to sound too negative, but I couldn't imagine having the lives of at least 75% of the people in the world (presuming I still had my negative mindset), and yet many of these people claim to be happy...

Just on one level, you won't be in school the rest of your life and you won't have the same job the rest of your life. I don't know what your family situation/obligations are, but as you get older you may allow yourself to reevaluate those relationships from the perspective of what's best for...

Over the last couple of days I've felt pretty sad, and although I've felt the beginning of an urge to cry, I was very far away from the point of actually having to cry. I guess the closest thing I could compare it to is being emotionally constipated. This morning in the shower I tried to get it...

Does anyone else on this forum constantly check their phone for texts/e-mails that never arrive? I shouldn't say never, because I'm fortunate enough to have a couple people in my life that I regularly text/e-mail. But I get nowhere near the amount of contact to justify my constantly checking my...

It's way too early to start making pronouncements about what the rest of your life is destined to be like. I lived my 20's in a state of numbness and isolation that just shocks me when I look back on it. But now I'm in my 30's and while I'm still lonely, I've starting taking emotional risks and...

Hah, when I visited Toronto, the first thing I said was, "Oh, it's a clean New York." But I think life in any metropolis has to be isolating. One concept I want to start a thread on once I have it more fleshed out is whether lonely people are too sensitive or the majority of the world is just...

I live in LA and it feels like the loneliest place in the world to me. I'm planning on moving to a smaller city soon, and while I don't think things are magically going to be better there, I'm looking forward to making a fresh start and trying to make connections there. One of the things I'll...

I wonder if romantic longing always needs to fix itself on an object, and if nothing exists in the present then the mind turns to the past. That seems to be how it is for me, at least. I ended something with a woman two months ago. And for the longest time I would come across old work notes...

I'm sorry to hear that you've been feeling isolated. I also lack someone to share the details of my life with. You should congratulate yourself for taking a step forward and coming to this forum. Best.

It's never too late to make meaningful connections with other people. I have also looked at pictures of myself and considered myself to be an obvious outsider. But you have to try to embrace your difference. And try to be as open with people as you can, even if it's painful. There's no such...

I get the sense that most people are not satisfied with their jobs. I personally look for satisfaction in my life through the few interpersonal relationships that I have, but when those aren't providing me with enough support, I feel the drudgery of work so much more.

There were years when I didn't have a cell phone. A couple of months ago I tried to get back together with my ex-girlfriend by surprising her with flowers. She told me her cell phone was blowing up with text messages from her friends giving her advice about what to do, and she showed me her...