change 4 good
Well-known member
Its a big problem for me. Most probably the one thing that upsets me the most. I dont have any friends...no one that I hang out with...just one or two that I see once in a blue moon. I try so hard when striking up new friendships but not being able to talk to people lets me down in a big way. People are honest...they say 'god, you are so quiet' and you dont say much do you!' After a while they give up on me and I dont hear from them again. I need to get rid of this mental block that appears when I am out with people, the fear that stops me from being able to think of things to say....the fear that stops me from keeping a conversation going. I can utter very little more than a yes or a no and that eventually kills a two way conversation.
I went out twice this week, with the same person. Although I know them I am not comfortable in a situation where I need to engage in conversation!
I felt scared and awkward because I know I obviously need to talk to keep the one sided conversation going.
I was unable to utter many words...eye contact is totally non existant. I was pulled up on this by the person I was out with who kept moving his head to try and engage me when my eyes were looking everywhere but him! I told him to stop it and that I couldnt make eye contact as by this point it was making me so **** uncomfortable. He talked quite a bit to start...until he ran out of things to say and then we both sat there in complete silence. My fault entirely. He sent me an email saying that he felt awkward.
I need to get out of this habit of feeling too shy/scared/terrified to talk to people. Here I am, so desperate for friends but then with no confidence and no communication skills whatsoever no wonder people dont hang around!
I am even like this around my own family. When I go and see my mum the exact same thing happens! I am now 42, been like this all my life. Is there any hope that I will ever change? Its crippling me!
I went out twice this week, with the same person. Although I know them I am not comfortable in a situation where I need to engage in conversation!
I felt scared and awkward because I know I obviously need to talk to keep the one sided conversation going.
I was unable to utter many words...eye contact is totally non existant. I was pulled up on this by the person I was out with who kept moving his head to try and engage me when my eyes were looking everywhere but him! I told him to stop it and that I couldnt make eye contact as by this point it was making me so **** uncomfortable. He talked quite a bit to start...until he ran out of things to say and then we both sat there in complete silence. My fault entirely. He sent me an email saying that he felt awkward.
I need to get out of this habit of feeling too shy/scared/terrified to talk to people. Here I am, so desperate for friends but then with no confidence and no communication skills whatsoever no wonder people dont hang around!
I am even like this around my own family. When I go and see my mum the exact same thing happens! I am now 42, been like this all my life. Is there any hope that I will ever change? Its crippling me!