Isolated at work

This goes for almost 10 months: at work I started to isolate from everyone and this week a new person joined my department - she noted I was away from everyone and on her second day (!) she asked what I was up to and why was I like that: thank God my phone rang and the conversation ended!

Do you think it can cause trouble being like this? I can't fake and pretend I like the people I work with and talk to them about fcking weather and how the weekend is near...

Yes. If you don't get along with your coworkers this can cause tension and when it comes around to making cutbacks your head could be on the chopping block. Employers just don't evaluate your performance but how you get along with coworkers as well. As a manager I've done this sort of thing. When I employed students through a provincially funded program part of the their evaluation forms were how well they got along with others. Same thing when giving recommendations, one of the things they ask is how the person gets along with others. Even if you don't enjoy it, it is always a good idea to try and mingle with your coworkers and show you can work cohesively.

+1

Sci-Fi said:

Yes. If you don't get along with your coworkers this can cause tension and when it comes around to making cutbacks your head could be on the chopping block. Employers just don't evaluate your performance but how you get along with coworkers as well ...

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It can be a bad thing depending on the job I think.

Last year I worked for a place for about 8 months then I was taken off the schedule for no reason. I was never late, never missed a shift, always got everything done and worked hard, and was always pleasant towards the others. But I also just straight out admitted to everyone that "yeah I am quiet", and I didn't put false effort in to socialize when I didn't feel like it.
Eventually I didn't receive a shift for like 4 weeks straight, then my name was removed from the schedule. I didn't bother to ask why because I didn't like the atmosphere and wanted to leave anyway.

However in contrast, I've been working at another place also, and its been over 4 years now and things are fine so far. The difference is that this job that I am at now involves much more independence and individual (as opposed to team) responsibility.

Personally I much rather prefer a job where I can be isolated or independent, and its something that I actually look for. When working more with others there just seems to be so much gossip that does on in the typical workplace, and I think that is very petty and it makes me sick.

LOL...I got into a shouting match with one of the techs at work yesterday morning. He was being a jerk and raised his voice to me over his OWN mistake. He has a history of doing that and once in a while I decide that, instead of ignoring him, I'm going to speak up. Well, it escalated to the point of shouting and he got frustrated and walked off. He came back a few minutes later and I gave him his first service call for the day and off he went. Later, when he called in for his second one, it was if nothing had happened. Later that evening, when he came in to turn in his paperwork and clock out, we had a bit of friendly conversation. It's kind of weird... when you work with people for so long, you get close enough to them to actually feel OK arguing with them (sometimes even LOUDLY, lol) but at the end of the day, you're still almost like family. There's something to be said for taking at least a little bit of interest in your co-workers IMO.

This is true.

I have worked with the exact same people for over ten years now.

One of the workers has a temper problem, but we ignore it when he gets loud - he is a really great person.


What is funny at work, the INTJ (me) and the ENTJ (SW) are the most laid back in the office - few things phase us.

However, whenever things get to a point where I get really pissed off (which is rarely), I simply fill out my slip for personal time off and leave for the day.

Everyone always laughs about it.

EveWasFramed said:

... It's kind of weird ... when you work with people for so long, you get close enough to them to actually feel OK arguing with them (sometimes even LOUDLY, lol) but at the end of the day, you're still almost like family. There's something to be said for taking at least a little bit of interest in your co-workers IMO.

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I quit my last job because I felt isolated

In the sense that even though I did my best and made a tiny error, I'd be moaned at and have the mick taken out of me. Nobody else go the same treatment.

I hated it so I quit. My next job I will quit again, if it happens again.

They always say do your best, but look where I ended up for doing my best! :club:

arrrggh... antisocial people in the workplace, what bores.
In some circumstances it might be better to stay 'professional', but mostly it's annoying and unnecessary professionalism when people ring-fence their lives so their true selves are completely unknowable to colleagues. It's not as though there aren't ample opportunities to talk (during breaks, lunch)

This is the place you spend a good deal of your life, but apparently you can't get familiar with anyone, as if we're meant to be robots. Not healthy.

the best thing about my job is there is always the customers to talk to.

I work with some nice people and some complete cunts. Last Friday for example. It was 10am and my time to go home. I was on the till serving so I rang the bell for someone to take over. Nobody came. On purpose as well, they knew it was my time to go home but couldn't be bothered to answer the bell. I rang 4 or 5 times as well and it wasn't until 10.10am that somebody came to take over. I wasn't happy since every other ****** is in the canteen about 5 minutes before their time is up and getting ready to go home. I made sure I went home 10 minutes the next day. Stuff like shows how little respect there is.

Another example, this woman was calling fresia out of this supervisor. A minute later the supervisor walks in and the woman talks to her like she's her best mate. Two faced or what ? I trust one co worker and that's it.

I wish I could stay isolated from everyone at my job. If I'm too quiet, my coworkers will start bugging me. ******* annoying as honeysuckle. Gotta keep that fake smile plastered on my face so no one finds out how miserable and depressed I am.

what about talking about it to your co-workers then?

That would just add to the drama. Ever seen the show Scrubs? That's basically what my job is like, but triple the drama and shittiness. I like to think of my job as digging ditches in the rain. Hell, I'd rather be doing that!

rdor said:

what about talking about it to your co-workers then?

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what I ve found out over the years is - people at work don't admit to mistakes, never admit they are wrong, will lie to your face etc. It's a waste of time talking things over with people. Best bet is to avoid arguments completely. Stand up for yourself if somebody confronts you but otherwise keep your head down !

I quit my last job because I felt isolated. I couldn't connect with them so I gave up.

The thing is if you are isolated you will feel horrible and will hate your job. It can also mean that you will never be at the same level as others, even if you do a better job.

Why don't you give it a try and see if you can interact with them?

If you are successful then at least you know you tried.

I understand not clicking with some people, but I suggest you try again. It sounds like you don't really hate your co-workers, but that you don't find the conversations deep or interesting. Why not see if someone shares your hobby? If all else fails, try helping someone at work. Working together on a project helps people bond.

Ste_lla said:

I quit my last job because I felt isolated. I couldn't connect with them so I gave up.

The thing is if you are isolated you will feel horrible and will hate your job. .

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And it affects your performance. Managers that enforce strict 'no fraternizing' policies are harming the business; a depressing environment and high staff turnover.