Unbearable scary disturbing thoughts.....

Please help, these thoughts are killing me. I am sorry that I cannot describe them here but these thoughts are mostly because of the things I accidentally came through (someone told me) which may or may not exist in reality, I dont know but are really disturbing and I dont want to ruin anyone's life by telling them what I was told. Well, its really something you cant imagine, really you cant, even if you are the strongest person in the world. And I am getting worse day by day as I have no ways to erase what already entered my brain. Why did I listen?? Why did these facts enter my mind? Why? I cant erase them from my memory. Please help.

Problem is if I tell anyone what I just heard, he may face problems like me too. So I have nobody to share my problem with and no way to erase it from my memory. The more I try to forget them, the stronger they become. I cant just undo them. What shall I do now?

hmm I don't really understand. Could you explain more in detail? Even by PM if you prefer.

No one can help you without knowing what you are talking about.
If you want you can PM me with whatever it is and I'll try my best to help if I can. Nothing you could say could bother me. Not to get into the details, but I've seen and heard and I know a lot of things that would horrify most people. Things like that cannot bother me anymore. Not because I am insensitive but because I am already broken. Maybe it's the same thing, though.

Is it something like this:
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TheseAreThingsManWasNotMeantToKnow

Not to make light of your situation at all.
I'm just saying there are a lot of things which are basically unspeakable, and trying to probe for answers often leads to confusion...

Wayfarer said:

hmm I don't really understand. Could you explain more in detail? Even by PM if you prefer.

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I cant dare to type. I will try.

Second thing I will just tell you about it. If you want to know what exactly it was, I will tell you, but I am not responsible for anything that happens to you like it did to me.

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there is no hope said:

Is it something like this:
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TheseAreThingsManWasNotMeantToKnow

Not to make light of your situation at all.
I'm just saying there are a lot of things which are basically unspeakable, and trying to probe for answers often leads to confusion...

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Heyy I cant dare to open that now. Sorry. Last night was the worst night I ever had. I couldn't sleep until 3:00 and woke up at 4:30 And in this duration I saw one of the worst nightmares. It was about the same thing that I was having trouble with.

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Despicable Me said:

No one can help you without knowing what you are talking about.
If you want you can PM me with whatever it is and I'll try my best to help if I can. Nothing you could say could bother me. Not to get into the details, but I've seen and heard and I know a lot of things that would horrify most people. Things like that cannot bother me anymore. Not because I am insensitive but because I am already broken. Maybe it's the same thing, though.

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I cant tell you. Sorry. Its ok that you wouldnt be able to help me, but I think you are lucky that the things I saw haven't entered your mind. Seriously bro you will want to erase it.

I care for you man, I believe that you are same as me.In terms of experiences and mindset. I cant dare to tell you. Believe me, as you are saying you are already broken, you are not. But you will be if you come across it. I dont want to see you in worse conditions than you are in. Its far far far far far beyond Loneliness, Relationship Issues, Social Problems, Depression and Miscellaneous Issues.

M_also_lonely said:

I cant tell you. Sorry. Its ok that you wouldnt be able to help me, but I think you are lucky that the things I saw haven't entered your mind. Seriously bro you will want to erase it.

I care for you man, I believe that you are same as me.In terms of experiences and mindset. I cant dare to tell you. Believe me, as you are saying you are already broken, you are not. But you will be if you come across it. I dont want to see you in worse conditions than you are in. Its far far far far far beyond Loneliness, Relationship Issues, Social Problems, Depression and Miscellaneous Issues.

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Well thank you for your concern, but as I said, I've seen and heard and know of some of the most horrific things on earth. Many things I possibly wish I could 'erase' as you say, but are impossible to forget. Things I have to live with for the rest of my life. Some things that most people on Earth will never see or could ever really imagine. Things that have happened to both me and to others. Nothing you could tell me now would actually make any difference at this point, truthfully.
If there was anything worse, I'm sure I'd have at least known about it by now.

But that choice is certainly up to you. I must admit you've made me a little curious, though.

Thank you Wayferer. I think sending you a PM was a better idea because the things I mentioned may not be appropriate for everyone here. I didnt want to hurt anyone. So I didnt tell it in public.

And yes I agree, I had forgotten that evil exists too. Before this happened I thought that people who lie, rob or abuse are the only evil.. Now I see that it was nothing in front of the brutality and cruelty and shameful activities that my friend accidentally came through. Infact he has consulted a psychiatrist and doing a healing course that is helping him a lot and is in better conditions now. Thank you for your help and opinions.

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Despicable Me said:

M_also_lonely said:

I cant tell you. Sorry. Its ok that you wouldnt be able to help me, but I think you are lucky that the things I saw haven't entered your mind. Seriously bro you will want to erase it.

I care for you man, I believe that you are same as me.In terms of experiences and mindset. I cant dare to tell you. Believe me, as you are saying you are already broken, you are not. But you will be if you come across it. I dont want to see you in worse conditions than you are in. Its far far far far far beyond Loneliness, Relationship Issues, Social Problems, Depression and Miscellaneous Issues.

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Well thank you for your concern, but as I said, I've seen and heard and know of some of the most horrific things on earth. Many things I possibly wish I could 'erase' as you say, but are impossible to forget. Things I have to live with for the rest of my life. Some things that most people on Earth will never see or could ever really imagine. Things that have happened to both me and to others. Nothing you could tell me now would actually make any difference at this point, truthfully.
If there was anything worse, I'm sure I'd have at least known about it by now.

But that choice is certainly up to you. I must admit you've made me a little curious, though.

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OK, I will send you a message soon.

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there is no hope said:

Is it something like this:
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TheseAreThingsManWasNotMeantToKnow

Not to make light of your situation at all.
I'm just saying there are a lot of things which are basically unspeakable, and trying to probe for answers often leads to confusion...

Click to expand...

I opened the link. And no, it was nothing scary to me.

M_also_lonely said:

Thank you Wayferer. I think sending you a PM was a better idea because the things I mentioned may not be appropriate for everyone here. I didnt want to hurt anyone. So I didnt tell it in public.

And yes I agree, I had forgotten that evil exists too. Before this happened I thought that people who lie, rob or abuse are the only evil.. Now I see that it was nothing in front of the brutality and cruelty and shameful activities that my friend accidentally came through. Infact he has consulted a psychiatrist and doing a healing course that is helping him a lot and is in better conditions now. Thank you for your help and opinions.

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You are welcome. Glad to know your friend is getting better. Although it's not much, do feel free to contact me again for whatever reason

Are you feeling any better now? Is your friend okay? Are you able to sleep? What frightened you to this degree?

Aisha said:

Are you feeling any better now? Is your friend okay? Are you able to sleep? What frightened you to this degree?

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I think so. And yes my friend is getting better. Sleep? No it is same as before.

Frightened me to this degree? I will send you a message.

Aisha said:

What frightened you to this degree?

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To be fair to everyone here... I do see why M was not willing to share this publicly. It is not really something that can be shared like that.

As I said before, I have seen a lot in my life, so I already knew of these things, but not everyone here does know, or at least does not know very much, nor would they really want to know.
Ask at your own risk. Know that nothing can be erased from your mind.

Despicable Me said:

To be fair to everyone here... I do see why M was not willing to share this publicly. It is not really something that can be shared like that.
As I said before, I have seen a lot in my life, so I already knew of these things, but not everyone here does know, or at least does not know very much, nor would they really want to know.
Ask at your own risk. Know that nothing can be erased from your mind.

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Thank you for the warning. I don't mean any offence in saying this, and I doubt you meant any either, but I do feel that that's a little condescending though DM. It's not possible for anyone to know everyone else's stories and what they've been through so yes, maybe you already know of it and have seen it, whatever it maybe, but so may other people.
The question was addressed to M, as were the others. It's up to him whether he chooses to answer. If he doesn't it's perfectly understandable.

Aisha said:

Thank you for the warning. I don't mean any offence in saying this, and I doubt you meant any either, but I do feel that that's a little condescending though DM. It's not possible for anyone to know everyone else's stories and what they've been through so yes, maybe you already know of it and have seen it, whatever it maybe, but so may other people.
The question was addressed to M, as were the others. It's up to him whether he chooses to answer. If he doesn't it's perfectly understandable.

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I can't see how you could possibly construe what I just said as condescending, but okay...
I simply meant, 'Don't ask unless you really are prepared for the answer'.

Not everyone has seen what I've seen, but that doesn't mean no one here has. I'm sure there are people here who already know everything M is worried about. Some of them have probably taken it better, as well.
Wayferer seems to have talked to M in PM, too, and he seems okay about it. I know of many people who would never want to know the existence of this sort of thing, as well. It all depends on the person.

It was just a warning for warnings sake. Don't take it the wrong way. You are likely the best judge for yourself, so anyone who read my post should know if the warning was applicable to them or not, unless they simply just don't know themselves well.
And it wasn't really directed at you in any way. I just quoted you because you had asked him after he told me what it was. I was talking to people here in general, though.

Despicable Me said:

It was just a warning for warnings sake. Don't take it the wrong way. You are likely the best judge for yourself, so anyone who read my post should know if the warning was applicable to them or not, unless they simply just don't know themselves well.
And it wasn't really directed at you in any way. I just quoted you because you had asked him after he told me what it was. I was talking to people here in general, though.

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I see. Thanks for clarifying.

Aisha said:

I see. Thanks for clarifying.

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And thank you for understanding.
I apologize if my wording was wrong before. Many long years of silence does not make for good communication skills.

Despicable Me said:

Aisha said:

I see. Thanks for clarifying.

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And thank you for understanding.
I apologize if my wording was wrong before. Many long years of silence does not make for good communication skills.

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No problem. Thank you for being civil. A little bit of niceness goes a long way.

Despicable Me said:

Ask at your own risk. Know that nothing can be erased from your mind.

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You right. There's alot of stuff that I wish I could erase from my mind.

Sometimes said:

Despicable Me said:

Ask at your own risk. Know that nothing can be erased from your mind.

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You right. There's alot of stuff that I wish I could erase from my mind.

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You and me both. But at the end of the day I just rationalize it as this:
I would not be who I am today if it weren't for the person I was before. So I can't regret things or feel too guilty about my previous actions or worry about the things in my past anymore than I can truly imagine being someone who I'm not.

Maybe that sounds a bit confusing, but it gives me some peace of mind.