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Help!!! Life and Dating Issues. Any Advice 🤭
#1
Hi All.

As you can all probably tell I’m reasonably new to this forum and I’ve got a couple of things that i would like to share with you all and possibly get some input.

So basically I’m 20 years old and I work as a support worker for people with learning disabilities I also look after my sisters so my mum can work to keep a roof over her head and the girls which means when I’m not working she is and I’m baby sitting from 7.30am-10pm (I don’t charge her to look after them).

So I have no time to myself so I’ve tried online dating with no luck at all like I’ve met a few guys but they only want one thing and then to leave (forgot to mention I’m gay lol) which I’m not into at all I think it might be im a bit mature for my age but I don’t know maybe????, like a few people have said it and said that it’s scares them but am I really mature because I don’t want just a one time fling ?.


And I think it has a lot to do with I don’t have a lot of time for people so I’m kinda scared about getting  into a relationship because I’m either working or baby sitting, but I can’t tell my mum that im not babysitting because that wouldn’t make me a bad person and make her homeless???

Any advice people please !!!. 🖤
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#2
(03-01-2018, 05:46 AM)AveryTroubledBoy Wrote: Hi All.

As you can all probably tell I’m reasonably new to this forum and I’ve got a couple of things that i would like to share with you all and possibly get some input.

So basically I’m 20 years old and I work as a support worker for people with learning disabilities I also look after my sisters so my mum can work to keep a roof over her head and the girls which means when I’m not working she is and I’m baby sitting from 7.30am-10pm (I don’t charge her to look after them).

So I have no time to myself so I’ve tried online dating with no luck at all like I’ve met a few guys but they only want one thing and then to leave (forgot to mention I’m gay lol) which I’m not into at all I think it might be im a bit mature for my age but I don’t know maybe????, like a few people have said it and said that it’s scares them but am I really mature because I don’t want just a one time fling ?.


And I think it has a lot to do with I don’t have a lot of time for people so I’m kinda scared about getting  into a relationship because I’m either working or baby sitting, but I can’t tell my mum that im not babysitting because that wouldn’t make me a bad person and make her homeless???

Any advice people please !!!. 🖤

LOL That's a lot of information, maybe I'm a bit daft; what exactly are you look to get advice on?
I personally think you do sound like a very mature person. Not everyone would have the patience to coach people with learning disabilities as well as looking after your family. That does give you a measure of responsibility that is not often seen in young adults your age. I applaud that.

But I'm unsure what advice you're looking for. Dating advice? I personally don't do online dating, specifically for the reasons you mentionned, among others I won't go into great detail with. Honestly your best bet would be to reserve some time, maybe one evening a week for starters, to either go the old fashion way of going into bars, or engaging in social activities where you are more likely to meet people who are single and available. As you're gay, I'm sure there are (I couldn't advise you on that, not being gay myself lol) places exclusive to gay people, either bars or social activity centers or groups, which favor the gathering of young men looking for stable, secure relationships. I'd advise you to at least try and make some time to investigate and engage in those activities.

I hope this helps, even if a little bit and good luck on your quest, dude!
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#3
How old are your sisters? Will they be an age where they can watch themselves soon? It is wonderful that you are caring for your family, but is there anyway for you to have a little bit of time for yourself?
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#4
There must be some way you can get at least a few hours to yourself, possibly even a whole day. Is there any way you could maybe find a babysitter and just take a few hours? Of course, you would have to be able to afford it, but it might be worth checking into. Or even a friend or family member that might help you out?
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#5
(03-01-2018, 06:30 AM)Richard_39 Wrote:
(03-01-2018, 05:46 AM)AveryTroubledBoy Wrote: Hi All.

As you can all probably tell I’m reasonably new to this forum and I’ve got a couple of things that i would like to share with you all and possibly get some input.

So basically I’m 20 years old and I work as a support worker for people with learning disabilities I also look after my sisters so my mum can work to keep a roof over her head and the girls which means when I’m not working she is and I’m baby sitting from 7.30am-10pm (I don’t charge her to look after them).

So I have no time to myself so I’ve tried online dating with no luck at all like I’ve met a few guys but they only want one thing and then to leave (forgot to mention I’m gay lol) which I’m not into at all I think it might be im a bit mature for my age but I don’t know maybe????, like a few people have said it and said that it’s scares them but am I really mature because I don’t want just a one time fling ?.


And I think it has a lot to do with I don’t have a lot of time for people so I’m kinda scared about getting  into a relationship because I’m either working or baby sitting, but I can’t tell my mum that im not babysitting because that wouldn’t make me a bad person and make her homeless???

Any advice people please !!!. 🖤

LOL That's a lot of information, maybe I'm a bit daft; what exactly are you look to get advice on?
I personally think you do sound like a very mature person. Not everyone would have the patience to coach people with learning disabilities as well as looking after your family. That does give you a measure of responsibility that is not often seen in young adults your age. I applaud that.

But I'm unsure what advice you're looking for. Dating advice? I personally don't do online dating, specifically for the reasons you mentionned, among others I won't go into great detail with. Honestly your best bet would be to reserve some time, maybe one evening a week for starters, to either go the old fashion way of going into bars, or engaging in social activities where you are more likely to meet people who are single and available. As you're gay, I'm sure there are (I couldn't advise you on that, not being gay myself lol) places exclusive to gay people, either bars or social activity centers or groups, which favor the gathering of young men looking for stable, secure relationships. I'd advise you to at least try and make some time to investigate and engage in those activities.

I hope this helps, even if a little bit and good luck on your quest, dude!

Thank you for your advics maybe I wasn’t very clear just don’t know what to do but thank you will take all you’ve said into considerationSmile

(03-01-2018, 11:57 AM)TheRealCallie Wrote: There must be some way you can get at least a few hours to yourself, possibly even a whole day.  Is there any way you could maybe find a babysitter and just take a few hours?  Of course, you would have to be able to afford it, but it might be worth checking into.  Or even a friend or family member that might help you out?

Will look into a baby sitter that’s a good idea but I just need to see how they will deal with that, unfortunately it’s a no no with family’s members as don’t have any well don’t talk to any thank you for your suggestions Smile

(03-01-2018, 11:57 AM)TheRealCallie Wrote: There must be some way you can get at least a few hours to yourself, possibly even a whole day.  Is there any way you could maybe find a babysitter and just take a few hours?  Of course, you would have to be able to afford it, but it might be worth checking into.  Or even a friend or family member that might help you out?

I keep trying but no luck yet but thank you for the advice Smile
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#6
How old are you siblings?
Do you ever go out and do things with them? I know you can't take them on dates or anything like that, but you could take them out to do things and possibly meet people that way. I'm talking more friendships with this one, but it could open you up to more possibilities.
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