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I am tired and I want to give up
#1
I feel depressed again.
I feel like I am trapped in a box and can't escape my problems but that's all I want to do.


I was doing good for a while.  I went back to learning again but I ran into a problem that I am having trouble solving.
I stopped for a few days.  Then I tried to learn another way to make money without spending money.
It still required work but no money to start up.  At first I was kind of motivated but now that I am closer to finishing I feel
afraid and depressed again.  I felt the same way when I came here the first time.

I have been trying to learn a skill so I can make money and hopefully fix my life.
It seems so futile.  I'm just tired.


I keep moping about my problems and the only thing I can do to stop it is distract myself (video games, music, daydreaming).
I wish I could just run away from everything.
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#2
I’m sorry your feeling depressed. 
When I’m down I try to think that every single time im feeling this way, it always gets better at some point. How long it takes is a mystery, but. It always gets better.
Got to keep on keeping on! There should be a switch you could press to feel better. I would have use for something like that. Power down and power up. 
Sending happy thoughts your way. 🌈
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#3
Its a vicious cycle isn't it? Always circling back to depression. Video games and music only push back the bad thoughts for a little bit but not always and not for long. Sometimes you feel hopeful and channel that energy towards improving yourself but depression is a jealous mistress(yes its a girl), she pulls you right back when you start to ignore her. You look to the horizon and see more of the same so you ask yourself, what's the point?.

I am gonna be egocentric for a bit and speak only from my own ongoing struggle with depression. I find that what triggers my depression the most is isolation. You see, the less people I interact with, the more I stay in my own head, the more my fear and anxiety get amplified, the more worthless I feel, the more I despair. 

The key element here is, "Stay out of your head". I can achieve that sometimes by keeping busy with an activity or training. So you find out what works for you.

Best of luck, friend.
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#4
(11-14-2018, 12:04 PM)worthless_loser Wrote: I feel depressed again.
I feel like I am trapped in a box and can't escape my problems but that's all I want to do.


I was doing good for a while.  I went back to learning again but I ran into a problem that I am having trouble solving.
I stopped for a few days.  Then I tried to learn another way to make money without spending money.
It still required work but no money to start up.  At first I was kind of motivated but now that I am closer to finishing I feel
afraid and depressed again.  I felt the same way when I came here the first time.

I have been trying to learn a skill so I can make money and hopefully fix my life.
It seems so futile.  I'm just tired.


I keep moping about my problems and the only thing I can do to stop it is distract myself (video games, music, daydreaming).
I wish I could just run away from everything.

Hi- I’m very sorry you feel depressed.When I feel sad, I cried while thinking that this too shall pass then start to feel alright. Please don’t lose hope. You’ve been doing good for a while, please don’t give up. Take one day at a time. 

I pray that things will get better for you and you will feel better. God bless.
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#5
Thanks for all the kind responses.

I think getting interactions from other people feels good.
It is nice to know I am not the only one with these kinds of problems.
Not that I am glad other people are suffering.

I have been feeling a little better.
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#6
I don't know exactly what skill you're trying to learn, though it doesnt really matter; you're obviously striving and that of itself is a good thing, it means you're interested in changing things. If you get discouraged so quickly, maybe its because your goal is, for the moment, too big or massive to be achieved; it happens. Were all different, do not have the same skills and do not advance at the same speed or rythym. What I would suggest, without exactly knowing what it is, is that you take something smaller, a more readily available goal and build on that. It is much easier to build on multiple small successes than it is to say, jump over a 40 foot gap and expect to make it AND look graceful AND still feel confident in oneself. Smaller steps. Several smaller goals instead of one big immediate one. Or break down your major goal in several, seperate smaller steps. It will help you gain confidence in yourself AND help you realize you ARE much better and also capable of doing great things than you suspect.

I hope this helps Smile
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#7
(11-14-2018, 12:04 PM)worthless_loser Wrote: I feel depressed again.
I feel like I am trapped in a box and can't escape my problems but that's all I want to do.


I was doing good for a while.  I went back to learning again but I ran into a problem that I am having trouble solving.
I stopped for a few days.  Then I tried to learn another way to make money without spending money.
It still required work but no money to start up.  At first I was kind of motivated but now that I am closer to finishing I feel
afraid and depressed again.  I felt the same way when I came here the first time.

I have been trying to learn a skill so I can make money and hopefully fix my life.
It seems so futile.  I'm just tired.


I keep moping about my problems and the only thing I can do to stop it is distract myself (video games, music, daydreaming).
I wish I could just run away from everything.

Well....you're trying and that's the great thing .keep trying even you feel like quitting.what if this option don't work you have another way.as I know there might be another choices.

as you know being in depression is worst thing.and you only one who can get rid of this.sometimes life is like that which never stopped giving you problems. so don't give up .
good luck Smile
Strong people don't put others down,
They lift them up.

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#8
Cycling seems much more common than perpetually unipolar.

a strong person can expose and put down a sociopathic demons because it doesn't count as a "other" or "others" as you know it.

A destructive force is preferable in a demierge.  creativity ain't for this realm. Vishnu the detroyerneeds to open a holy can while Brahma the creator cheerleads and put an end to this error.
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#9
You sound a bit like me.
But you have a better understanding of your issues than me.
I am waiting to hear from mental health team. Doctor mentioned possible PTSD.
I used to be different.
I had everything I ever wanted.
An awesome family. A great job. I was confident. I was hard.
But there were issues.
My gfs ex.
He traumatised her and her kids.
When I found out he slept with his daughter I went mental. He tried to hit my gf and I nearly killed him.
The kids know it was me and they love me even more. They call me dad. But my gf changed.
I know she loves me and misses me cos kids tell me.
But she had a breakdown. Kids are messed up.
I had a breakdown.
We had to separate.
I don't understand what is wrong with me.
I used to bareknuckle. I used to be debt collector.
People feared me. I had money and respect. But I changed my life, found the girl of my dreams. Got a 9-5 real job, earning money on the right side of the law.
Life was sweet.
Now I can't even go to supermarket. Too many people. I can't concentrate. Everything is turning to shit.
I can't get my family back until I am me again.
But without my family everything is shit.
I don't know how to fix me.
I need help.
I wish someone would just tell me what's wrong with me so I can figure out how to fix it.
I want my head back.
I have a different outlook on mental health issues now.
And I am shocked at what I have found out.
There is no help.
Unless you go and find it.
How can you go and find it when you don't even want to get out of bed in the morning (or afternoon)?
I don't want to take mong pills.
I want to understand why and how my brain broke so bad.
I want to fix me.
But I have to wait on a letter.
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy is what I am pinning my hopes on.
I believe you need to speak to somebody. I believe speaking to the right person would do you far more good than taking the mong tablets.
Why is there so little help out there for people with Mental Health issues?
I feel for you, I really do.
Do not give up.
This is no life.
There is something better out there.
We just have to fix our heads so we can find it.
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#10
(11-14-2018, 09:35 PM)Phantimos Wrote: Its a vicious cycle isn't it? Always circling back to depression. Video games and music only push back the bad thoughts for a little bit but not always and not for long. Sometimes you feel hopeful and channel that energy towards improving yourself but depression is a jealous mistress(yes its a girl), she pulls you right back when you start to ignore her. You look to the horizon and see more of the same so you ask yourself, what's the point?.

I am gonna be egocentric for a bit and speak only from my own ongoing struggle with depression. I find that what triggers my depression the most is isolation. You see, the less people I interact with, the more I stay in my own head, the more my fear and anxiety get amplified, the more worthless I feel, the more I despair. 

The key element here is, "Stay out of your head". I can achieve that sometimes by keeping busy with an activity or training. So you find out what works for you.

Best of luck

I'm the same when it comes to depression. I'm usually pumped after having done something noteworthy or new, especially if it involved interacting with new people. I just have trouble sustaining things like that. I tend to fall backwards, instead of using that feeling and bringing about real change in my life.
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