Alone

[MHD]

I'm 15 years old and i don't have any friends. I just moved to high school last month but I still have no friends, no one to talk too even though i don't speak much. I have no siblings either so im completely alone in my life. Im unattractive, useless, lazy and depressed, I have motivation, I live every day because i have to not because i want to, i want to disappear from this world.

 

[dd11]

You are not all those things you describe. You are not unattractive, lazy and useless. Stop describing yourself in that manner. OK you are in HS now. That can be tough. I have a 14 yr old daughter. I get it. For now, be your best YOU. Be enthusiastic about what you are enthusiastic about. You can be attractive by simply taking care of yourself. If you have no motivation that needs to come from within you. Others cannot motivate what is you. Find what it is that you care about, like, enjoy and have interest in and go pursue those things.
Everyone can't or won't be your friend or best friend. So what? Have fun and smile and laugh and be lighthearted with whoever you are with. Act AS IF you are their friends and soon you will be.

 

[TheRealCallie]

You are not all those things you describe. You are not unattractive, lazy and useless. Stop describing yourself in that manner. OK you are in HS now. That can be tough. I have a 14 yr old daughter. I get it. For now, be your best YOU. Be enthusiastic about what you are enthusiastic about. You can be attractive by simply taking care of yourself. If you have no motivation that needs to come from within you. Others cannot motivate what is you. Find what it is that you care about, like, enjoy and have interest in and go pursue those things.
Everyone can't or won't be your friend or best friend. So what? Have fun and smile and laugh and be lighthearted with whoever you are with. Act AS IF you are their friends and soon you will be.

I have to agree with this. If you go into it like you are going to fail, chances are high that you will fail. Find something you enjoy and run with it. Talk to people and make friends if you want them.

You have your whole life ahead of you and YOU get to decide what that life will be like. It's never to late to change who you are if you don't like who you are.

 

[randomhero1984]

I know at 15 it can seem like nothing will change, I felt similar at 15 but I would give anything to go back to then to start again.

You're entire life is in front of you, you don't see it now but you hold all the power for your future life in your hands. Craft what you want to be and succeed, happiness doesn't come from others, but within. Be who you want to be, be happy, succeed and then watch as those around you who seem like they have it all now struggle to cope with life and relationships very soon.

Keep your head up

 

[amacolor]

I'm 15 years old and i don't have any friends. I just moved to high school last month but I still have no friends, no one to talk too even though i don't speak much. I have no siblings either so im completely alone in my life. Im unattractive, useless, lazy and depressed, I have motivation, I live every day because i have to not because i want to, i want to disappear from this world.

hey. high school is shitty. people are shitty. find the least shitty people you can and start hanging around with them. people are shitty but also people will be nice to you if you show up, you know? just be around. joe biden them. just be there.

 

[MortSahlfan]

Sorry to hear. Do you have any hobbies? Laughter is great medicine, music, movies.. Things you can do alone until you find what you are looking for.

 

[constant stranger]

15 can be a tough age but it's too soon to disappear from the world. Coming here is a good move for you and people have already given you some pretty good advice....it isn't going to be easy to make it real, the advice that is, but don't quit on yourself. And that useless and lazy stuff.....? Don't be making that a self fulfilling prophecy. I'd like to hear from you again on this forum, preferably with at least an intention on your part to improve your self esteem. Believe that you're in control of your own fate!

 

[Droopy]

Education phase is what it is. It's hit or miss or alright.

Try not to waste it though. You're 15. You still have more than 5 years you can stay in school for.

If you don't like the way you look, change. It's as simple as that.

You have a chance, I'm already done with school. I already wish I had done it differently. I wish I had started to take care of myself and work out sooner.

 

[MentatsGhoul]

Honestly, I would have hated to hear this at 15, and I still hate hearing it at 20, but you haven't even started your life yet. That doesn't make your problems any less legitimate, that doesn't mean you don't have a right to feel the way you do, and don't let anyone make you feel bad for that. But seriously mate, take a step back and think rationally.
At 15 you
a) aren't even fully grown/fully developed mentally or physically
b) you haven't finished high school, in fact, you're not even on your last two years (presumably). Universities, colleges, jobs. Chances are, they won't even look at your current achievements much yet. So it's not like you've messed anything up yet, because that would be essentially impossible
c) Even if you don't make many friends in high school, chances are you're not gonna see any of them once you graduate anyway. Very few people actually establish their adult social lives primarily with people they knew at your age, and honestly, would you even want to?

As for looks, laziness... I had the same problems. But I know this sounds like generic advice, but hit the gym. Change around your style. Experiment with different looks. I'm a well above average looking guy, but guess how I look when I just wear glasses and baggy shorts and old t-shirts and don't style my hair. Hint, I still look like honeysuckle. The truth is, you can't even KNOW how attractive you are unless you give yourself the chance to actually be attractive and put the work in to present yourself well. Trust me, it's way easier than it sounds, and you can get addicted to working out pretty quickly, if you do something you enjoy.
And now's the time to get a **** hobby. I started writing at 18. If I had started at your age, I might be on a near professional level now. Instead I have to deal with a lot of frustration, and slowly watching myself progress while having to deal with my future career and degree at the same time. So, if there's anything you want to do, drawing, writing, animation, whatever it may be... if you're reading this, get started, now, today. Don't "plan" it or feel sorry for yourself for not being great. Just get started now. Might change your life

 

[MHD]

Honestly, I would have hated to hear this at 15, and I still hate hearing it at 20, but you haven't even started your life yet. That doesn't make your problems any less legitimate, that doesn't mean you don't have a right to feel the way you do, and don't let anyone make you feel bad for that. But seriously mate, take a step back and think rationally.
At 15 you
a) aren't even fully grown/fully developed mentally or physically
b) you haven't finished high school, in fact, you're not even on your last two years (presumably). Universities, colleges, jobs. Chances are, they won't even look at your current achievements much yet. So it's not like you've messed anything up yet, because that would be essentially impossible
c) Even if you don't make many friends in high school, chances are you're not gonna see any of them once you graduate anyway. Very few people actually establish their adult social lives primarily with people they knew at your age, and honestly, would you even want to?

As for looks, laziness... I had the same problems. But I know this sounds like generic advice, but hit the gym. Change around your style. Experiment with different looks. I'm a well above average looking guy, but guess how I look when I just wear glasses and baggy shorts and old t-shirts and don't style my hair. Hint, I still look like honeysuckle. The truth is, you can't even KNOW how attractive you are unless you give yourself the chance to actually be attractive and put the work in to present yourself well. Trust me, it's way easier than it sounds, and you can get addicted to working out pretty quickly, if you do something you enjoy.
And now's the time to get a **** hobby. I started writing at 18. If I had started at your age, I might be on a near professional level now. Instead I have to deal with a lot of frustration, and slowly watching myself progress while having to deal with my future career and degree at the same time. So, if there's anything you want to do, drawing, writing, animation, whatever it may be... if you're reading this, get started, now, today. Don't "plan" it or feel sorry for yourself for not being great. Just get started now. Might change your life

Alright. I think I should tell more about myself, so here's a short list:
-I'm a gym member for 4 months, tho i don't have much time for it because of school, transport and other stuff...
-I play chess, I'm not in any chess club, but I play it at home with dad or on internet, so this is hobby I guess?
-I'm not fat in case if anyone think this, I'm skinny but tall, but I can't change my height
-some my schoolmates smoke tobacco and weed, and I don't, never tried, never want to try, so you can see I'm not in very deep sh*t yet
-some people in high school are stupid and are there just to make troubles (two things are infinite: universe and human stupidity and I'm not sure about the universe  -Einstine)

 

[MentatsGhoul]

Alright. I think I should tell more about myself, so here's a short list:
-I'm a gym member for 4 months, tho i don't have much time for it because of school, transport and other stuff...
-I play chess, I'm not in any chess club, but I play it at home with dad or on internet, so this is hobby I guess?
-I'm not fat in case if anyone think this, I'm skinny but tall, but I can't change my height
-some my schoolmates smoke tobacco and weed, and I don't, never tried, never want to try, so you can see I'm not in very deep sh*t yet
-some people in high school are stupid and are there just to make troubles (two things are infinite: universe and human stupidity and I'm not sure about the universe  -Einstine)

You're way less alone than you think on most of those points. Not to undermine your issues, but a lot of people face similar problems in high school
- Good that you're a gym member. Honestly, you can work out at home too, that's how I started out. Just get a pair of dumbbells, learn some exercises and get a routine. If you can't do a full hour, just do 20 minutes of intense workout or something.
- The chess part... that's up to you. Are you passionate about it? Does it help you feel fulfilled? Would you like to meet other people who play chess? If so, then sure, if not, try to find some more stuff to do
- I'm confused (sorry). Did you mean to say you're skinny but not tall? Or are you tall? Because that's not a bad thing
- Honestly, I can relate since I was pretty clean in high school. But, as someone who is currently a borderline alcoholic, in university I've met A LOT of people who are pretty much straightedge or whatever you call it. You CAN find people who don't smoke, drink or do drugs, there's a lot more than you think. Don't just focus on the loud, obnoxious "popular" people who you probably wouldn't like anyway. And if not now, probably later on in life

 

[MHD]

Alright. I think I should tell more about myself, so here's a short list:
-I'm a gym member for 4 months, tho i don't have much time for it because of school, transport and other stuff...
-I play chess, I'm not in any chess club, but I play it at home with dad or on internet, so this is hobby I guess?
-I'm not fat in case if anyone think this, I'm skinny but tall, but I can't change my height
-some my schoolmates smoke tobacco and weed, and I don't, never tried, never want to try, so you can see I'm not in very deep sh*t yet
-some people in high school are stupid and are there just to make troubles (two things are infinite: universe and human stupidity and I'm not sure about the universe  -Einstine)

You're way less alone than you think on most of those points. Not to undermine your issues, but a lot of people face similar problems in high school
- Good that you're a gym member. Honestly, you can work out at home too, that's how I started out. Just get a pair of dumbbells, learn some exercises and get a routine. If you can't do a full hour, just do 20 minutes of intense workout or something.
- The chess part... that's up to you. Are you passionate about it? Does it help you feel fulfilled? Would you like to meet other people who play chess? If so, then sure, if not, try to find some more stuff to do
- I'm confused (sorry). Did you mean to say you're skinny but not tall? Or are you tall? Because that's not a bad thing
- Honestly, I can relate since I was pretty clean in high school. But, as someone who is currently a borderline alcoholic, in university I've met A LOT of people who are pretty much straightedge or whatever you call it. You CAN find people who don't smoke, drink or do drugs, there's a lot more than you think. Don't just focus on the loud, obnoxious "popular" people who you probably wouldn't like anyway. And if not now, probably later on in life

Yes I'm tall and skinny. Sometimes it is a bad thing when people stare at you or something like that (I'm 187cm, yeah I know too tall, but I can't do anything )=
Yes I would like to meet other people who play chess, but I'm not very good at it and if there are people who play only chess and do nothing else i probabl would't like them. I play billiard too and bowling. (I don't play basketball, maybe people ask me that)
I don't have dumbbells, but I do have chest extander and hand grips. I do push ups few times a day (5-10, I can't do more) and I do some sit ups, russian twists, leg raises... stuff like that.
I would like some friends that would go out with me and play billards, watch movies on friday nights, have fun (jokes and stuff) but the reality is that I sit here behind the computer searching for help

 

[MentatsGhoul]

Alright. I think I should tell more about myself, so here's a short list:
-I'm a gym member for 4 months, tho i don't have much time for it because of school, transport and other stuff...
-I play chess, I'm not in any chess club, but I play it at home with dad or on internet, so this is hobby I guess?
-I'm not fat in case if anyone think this, I'm skinny but tall, but I can't change my height
-some my schoolmates smoke tobacco and weed, and I don't, never tried, never want to try, so you can see I'm not in very deep sh*t yet
-some people in high school are stupid and are there just to make troubles (two things are infinite: universe and human stupidity and I'm not sure about the universe  -Einstine)

You're way less alone than you think on most of those points. Not to undermine your issues, but a lot of people face similar problems in high school
- Good that you're a gym member. Honestly, you can work out at home too, that's how I started out. Just get a pair of dumbbells, learn some exercises and get a routine. If you can't do a full hour, just do 20 minutes of intense workout or something.
- The chess part... that's up to you. Are you passionate about it? Does it help you feel fulfilled? Would you like to meet other people who play chess? If so, then sure, if not, try to find some more stuff to do
- I'm confused (sorry). Did you mean to say you're skinny but not tall? Or are you tall? Because that's not a bad thing
- Honestly, I can relate since I was pretty clean in high school. But, as someone who is currently a borderline alcoholic, in university I've met A LOT of people who are pretty much straightedge or whatever you call it. You CAN find people who don't smoke, drink or do drugs, there's a lot more than you think. Don't just focus on the loud, obnoxious "popular" people who you probably wouldn't like anyway. And if not now, probably later on in life

Yes I'm tall and skinny. Sometimes it is a bad thing when people stare at you or something like that (I'm 187cm, yeah I know too tall, but I can't do anything )=
Yes I would like to meet other people who play chess, but I'm not very good at it and if there are people who play only chess and do nothing else i probabl would't like them. I play billiard too and bowling. (I don't play basketball, maybe people ask me that)
I don't have dumbbells, but I do have chest extander and hand grips. I do push ups few times a day (5-10, I can't do more) and I do some sit ups, russian twists, leg raises... stuff like that.
I would like some friends that would go out with me and play billards, watch movies on friday nights, have fun (jokes and stuff) but the reality is that I sit here behind the computer searching for help

Dude 187 too tall? I'm 194, and I was probably a little bit taller than you or around the same height when I was 15. Sometimes there are some legitimate issues with being tall and it drawing attention to you (as I know myself all too well), but it's still generally seen as a good quality, and it's not like you're circus freak height or anything. Maybe you live in a country where the average height is a bit shorter, but that really isn't too bad. Haha, I can relate to the basketball part though.
Chest extender and hand grips are good, also keep up the push ups and sit ups and stuff, good work on that. I'm naturally bigger, so I never really had these issues, but maybe for someone who is skinny, perhaps also look at diet? Growing muscle requires protein and you need to be pretty well fed. I also do recommend getting dumbbells or something of similar nature just to better workout your arms and maybe enhance some of your exercises.
As for chess and stuff, well, one bit of advice that's helped me is show a genuine interest in the things other people do. Even if it's not something you're into, ask them about it. In my experience, people LOVE talking about the stuff they enjoy, and often it's easier to make friends by having someone introduce you to something new, rather than talking about stuff you already know

 

[ardour]

Even if you grow a couple more inches you won't be "too tall". A lot of women love tall and skinny guys, certainly more than average to below average height men.

 

[MHD]

There is another thing I didn't want to talk about, but I think I can tell it here, I have sunken chest or Pectus excavatum. Basicly my chest is about 3cm deep and it doesn't look good, so I don't like to walk without t-shirt in summer for example. Life really hates me.

 

[BadGuy]

I am sure lots of us here would like to go back to 15 with the knowledge we have now a do over
As normal as smoking weed seems no everyone does ...I think your stronger than you realize for not wanting too

A over weight person wants to be thinner ...a short person wants to be taller .... curly hair wants straight
It seems we always want or think somebody else has something better

I have met people who I thought had it all and found out they also have insecurities

 

[Xpendable]

A over weight person wants to be thinner ...a short person wants to be taller .... curly hair wants straight
It seems we always want or think somebody else has something better

One of those 3 is not possible.

 

[BadGuy]

A over weight person wants to be thinner ...a short person wants to be taller .... curly hair wants straight
It seems we always want or think somebody else has something better

One of those 3 is not possible.

just SOME examples of people wanting 

As one of the biggest kids in high school I was close friends with one of the skinniest kids 
Neither of us cared about the others weight BUT I also made sure he didnt  get picked on by others because of his size

 

[Xpendable]

A short person can't grow, but an overweght person can lose weight and curly hair can be straighten. Some people can achieve a phisical change, but we have to be realistic.

 

[BadGuy]

A short person can't grow, but an overweght person can lose weight and curly hair can be straighten. Some people can achieve a phisical change, but we have to be realistic.

part of being realistic is realizing everyone is different