Anniversaries of bad events

[edamame721]

I'm having a rough night and feeling overwhelmed. Last December my grandfather was hospitalized and my best friend hurt me at the worst possible moment, even though I was trying to be there for her. Things became hell shortly, with both my grandparents hospitalized. It was pretty traumatic for me -- it's been a year, but suddenly, I'm remembering all those events.

How do you guys deal with anniversaries of bad events? Do they ever fade away?

 

[9006]

We as humans remember bad events much easier than good or normal events as a way of protecting ourselves, and this time of year has bad memories attached to it so it's normal you're remembering all this again.

For some people these memories will never go away, but at least they're definitely get easier to deal with, hopefully if you have a good year this time then it's something that will become better as time goes on.

 

[ladyforsaken]

We as humans remember bad events much easier than good or normal events as a way of protecting ourselves, and this time of year has bad memories attached to it so it's normal you're remembering all this again.

For some people these memories will never go away, but at least they're definitely get easier to deal with, hopefully if you have a good year this time then it's something that will become better as time goes on.

I gotta agree with 9006 here. It's not easy to forget things like these that happen in our lives. And I also gotta agree that with time, it would get easierto deal with the loss/pain...and the timing varies with each person too.

Try to relax, and try to stay calm with these memories in mind. Try to also think of the things they taught you, maybe that might help. *hugs*

 

[Gutted]

I tend to try not to remember. Not the best thing to do but I'm still here in decent health. Worked so far lol.

 

[Tiina63]

Hello edemame, I don't think that traumatic events ever fade away completely. As time goes by, we may put them more to the back of our minds, but when the anniversaries come around, they naturally occupy the forefront of our minds once again.
My dad died in December 1997 and mum in December 2000, so like you I have no great love for this month.

 

[Solivagant]

Hello edemame, I don't think that traumatic events ever fade away completely. As time goes by, we may put them more to the back of our minds, but when the anniversaries come around, they naturally occupy the forefront of our minds once again.

^ I agree. I have one coming up on Friday myself, and while I'm trying not to let it occupy my thoughts, it's still there, looming, with all the memories attached to it, ready to invade.

 

[edamame721]

Thanks everyone, for letting me know you've experienced similar unpleasant reminders. I'm still having some bad nights but not as bad as the one that prompted me to post. I'm trying to make sure I plan something to look forward to and keep myself going through the month.

 

[Shelterdog71]

I can relate. I've had pretty much every holiday or birthday ruined by bad events that had to do with my parents health issues (mom's cancer, dad's heart attack). It's been a few years and it's getting easier to deal with now. I don't dwell on the bad stuff anymore but I will ALWAYS remember.

 

[Sci-Fi]

For some people these memories will never go away, but at least they're definitely get easier to deal with, hopefully if you have a good year this time then it's something that will become better as time goes on.

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