another newbie

[dido]

hello everyone my name is Dido, f, philippines, just turned 23 today, and i always feel a little weird whenever birthday turns up...anxiety, birthday blues? Anyway i'm more of a loner than lonely, although loneliness and depression are no strangers to me.
My depression started when i was 12, not sure how and why it started but since then it's given me a feeling of desolation and impending doom. When i'm in my good days i'm a carefree, well meaning person without dark undertones. I love nature, and going out for a hike or whatever activities that let me in touch with nature give of freshness and joy. And being a loner by nature, i prefer my own company over others. Always keeping things to myself, not getting used to around many people make it difficult to form bonds with other people, and even keeping up on a normal conversation, and it's especially hard to share my thoughts and emotions to someone, even they,re my own family. It's frustrating, as well as disappointing... Made me think i'm not normal but i keep on trying, however cold it is to some. I have few close friends, never been in a relationship; i know i need to interact with others more from all walks of life... It seems that the internet is a good place to start.
Detachment and simplicity are two things i'm trying to achieve in life, that is, finding contentment and peace on what i have and making the most of the moment.
That's it for now and i hope we'll meet down the road.
Fare meeting you well, good people, and have a nice day.

 

[pacman]

Happy birthday!!!

And welcome to the forum

 

[dido]

^thanks pacman, for the greeting and the warm welcome.
-D

 

[Barbaloot]

Welcome to the forum. I'm sure you will find a lot of people with whom you can relate to here. And happy birthday!

 

[AfterDark]

Hi and welcome....
I think I know why you are anxious when your birthday is coming up. You start to wonder.. was I really born? I don't recall it! Where is the proof? A birth certificate? It's just a piece of paper... You can never be sure that it really is your birthday :O

I can relate as I am a bit of a loner too, but I don't believe anyone would be better off all alone if they could only find the right company.

Take care!

 

[harmony]

Hi there, I'm new too.

I can relate to a lot of what you say. I get lonely a lot but I'm also a loner and have been since I was a child. I wish I had more company sometimes but I do need my own space. I love nature and often sit out in my garden watching the birds. Spirituality is important to me and leading a simple life in the present moment is a major part of that. You mention 'detachment' - is that in context with Buddhism or something else?

I hope you get what you need from this nice looking site.

 

[ladyforsaken]

Hi Dido, welcome to the forum

 

[MissGuided]

Hi and happy belated birthday. Welcome to ALL.

 

[dido]

Hi and welcome....
I think I know why you are anxious when your birthday is coming up. You start to wonder.. was I really born? I don't recall it! Where is the proof? A birth certificate? It's just a piece of paper... You can never be sure that it really is your birthday :O

I can relate as I am a bit of a loner too, but I don't believe anyone would be better off all alone if they could only find the right company.

Take care!

Yeah I thought on that too last week though it’s more like nervous about the coming ‘deadline’. It’s as if you haven’t done enough living your age and seeing yourself as a failure for not doing things you should have done. But I’m okay now, though. I agree with you. My two close friends know that I’m a loner and they don’t push me on going out with them in gatherings they know I don’t like. My respect goes out to them.

Hi there, I'm new too.

I can relate to a lot of what you say. I get lonely a lot but I'm also a loner and have been since I was a child. I wish I had more company sometimes but I do need my own space. I love nature and often sit out in my garden watching the birds. Spirituality is important to me and leading a simple life in the present moment is a major part of that. You mention 'detachment' - is that in context with Buddhism or something else?

I hope you get what you need from this nice looking site.

Thank you. I’m relieved I’m not alone on this. I thought I’m missing a major part of my life ‘cause I’m don’t really hang out with people that much and lacking social skills I just find solace in nature and doing solitary activities. You’re right in mentioning detachment in Buddhism context; I also draw it from other two philosophies Taoism and Stoicism. I still have not come to terms with my spirituality, but I’m open to any thought that would cultivate the right way of living.


@AfterDark, @harmony, @ladyforsaken @Barbaloot @Missguided
Thank you guys for such warm welcome, and the greetings too, though it takes time learning on how forums work...

 

[MissyEchelon]

hi and welcome

 

[harmony]

[/quote]
Thank you. I’m relieved I’m not alone on this. I thought I’m missing a major part of my life ‘cause I’m don’t really hang out with people that much and lacking social skills I just find solace in nature and doing solitary activities. You’re right in mentioning detachment in Buddhism context; I also draw it from other two philosophies Taoism and Stoicism. I still have not come to terms with my spirituality, but I’m open to any thought that would cultivate the right way of living.

[/quote]

Me neither re spirituality, an endless search...but I like Buddhism and resonate with its teachings.

Look forward to chatting with you.