anyone

[Jeremi]

Ooh, that's very brave of you to go to the movies by yourself, Sarah and Evanescence. I LOVE movies, but I can't remember the last time I visited a cinema. I saw "A Knights Tale" alone around 5 years ago, but I've been to scared to go alone ever since ^^

 

[jales]

How-dee do? Lana Lue?
Okay Well yes I can relate to not having any real friends and all that.. except for people on this site like lonelwolf and so on.. i really do have no friends. Well I have no present touchable friends lol.

But this is life; for now. So Miss. Sarah.. let's talk..where do you work? do you enjoy your job?
And yes guys can be such jerks (girl can be mean as well ..but lucky that's not our consern hehe). I don't know how to find a good guy.. How old are you btw?

Humm..well my day was pretty slow and depressing got up for class, felt really sad in class, went for brownies and there was none.. its amazing how much I waste money just to get rid of the sadness lol. It's a stupid sadness as well.

You say you pretend to be happy... I think they were right when they said pretend something long enough and you become what you pretend. Does it feel that way for you? Well it's the weekend.. how do weekends usually go for you?

Hoping you reply..
a fellow alonelylifer
Jales

Hi Jales
I am sorry to hear that you have no touchable friends. I am an RN and yes, I do like my job. I work in emergency rooms. I feel rewarded when I have made somebody else's day a little better plus, it is instant gratification. The people I work with are just aquaintences. At times I blame my job as the cause of my being alone. I work such really odd hours.

I really didn't mean to lump all guys into the jerk group eventhough my message read that way. I have not taken a poll so I do not have the statistics to support my claim. I am not really lookin for a anybody but it would sure be nice to learn how to spot the jerks so that I could take the opposite direction.

No brownies? How could that possibly happen?:shy: Ok, I am being silly now. I have been known to try to eat myself out of a depressing day. For me, trying to eat my way happy is counterproductive because, I have to pay that back in workouts. What class did you have that day?

Weekends....well, if I am not working (more often than not) I just watch tv, watch movies, study, over eat, or, sleep. I get so depressed when I have more than 2 days off. I do not like the weekends that I am off of work. Come to think of it, I don't like to spend my weekends working either. What do you do with your weekends?

Pretending to be happy has not been fruitful but, then again, how long do you have to pretend something before it becomes true?

Sarah

Hey Sarah..

You know I think it would be great to have a touchable friend, but the online-people that I know and spend time with are so amazing that I know I'm blessed in any case. Recently I was in an emergency room for almost an entire day and I saw two people died. It was something I don't think I'll ever forget.

Hospitals seem like an amazing place to work because they are like an entire 'world' or community.. and it's purpose is defined. I mean..within a hospital there is so much.. food is made there... there are laundry places..everything that is necessary can be done. It's an interesting place to observe.

The odd hour thing can really make your time seem shorter. When you come home from work at 2am instead of 5pm youre more likely to just sleep I guess. But it depends on your pattern... and if you dont sleep..since everyone else is sleeping you can feel strangely alone; it's why I'm so grateful for the internet ..and people who live in different time zones.

As far as telling the difference between good and jerk guys.. I've been fooled pretty badly before so I guess I dont really have the answers. But my advice would be to keep exploring, protect your heart for the sake of your sanity, and have an idea of what you want.

Also know that whatever comes your way or will come your way.. you can survive it..and you can heal after it..just like in medicine. Some scars are to deep to really heal but most arent. I must sound like one of those crazy motivational writers now..lmao. I'm usually a pretty depressing soul.

Recently I've been spending my weekends with a friend from this site. Maybe you get depressed because you need someone to talk to? What sort of stuff do you think when you get low? Lol this is getting long so...sorry that this reply was so long.. reply whenever you get the time.

also..I study rocks and we'll try an experiment with the pretending thing.. how long have you been at it?

bye 4 now
Jales.

 

[Sarahlone]

Ooh, that's very brave of you to go to the movies by yourself, Sarah and Evanescence. I LOVE movies, but I can't remember the last time I visited a cinema. I saw "A Knights Tale" alone around 5 years ago, but I've been to scared to go alone ever since ^^

It is not so bad if you go at an odd time of day to avoid the dinner and a movie date crowd.

 

[Sarahlone]

Hey Sarah..

You know I think it would be great to have a touchable friend, but the online-people that I know and spend time with are so amazing that I know I'm blessed in any case. Recently I was in an emergency room for almost an entire day and I saw two people died. It was something I don't think I'll ever forget.

Hospitals seem like an amazing place to work because they are like an entire 'world' or community.. and it's purpose is defined. I mean..within a hospital there is so much.. food is made there... there are laundry places..everything that is necessary can be done. It's an interesting place to observe.

The odd hour thing can really make your time seem shorter. When you come home from work at 2am instead of 5pm youre more likely to just sleep I guess. But it depends on your pattern... and if you dont sleep..since everyone else is sleeping you can feel strangely alone; it's why I'm so grateful for the internet ..and people who live in different time zones.

As far as telling the difference between good and jerk guys.. I've been fooled pretty badly before so I guess I dont really have the answers. But my advice would be to keep exploring, protect your heart for the sake of your sanity, and have an idea of what you want.

Also know that whatever comes your way or will come your way.. you can survive it..and you can heal after it..just like in medicine. Some scars are to deep to really heal but most arent. I must sound like one of those crazy motivational writers now..lmao. I'm usually a pretty depressing soul.

Recently I've been spending my weekends with a friend from this site. Maybe you get depressed because you need someone to talk to? What sort of stuff do you think when you get low? Lol this is getting long so...sorry that this reply was so long.. reply whenever you get the time.

also..I study rocks and we'll try an experiment with the pretending thing.. how long have you been at it?

bye 4 now
Jales.

Study rocks as in geology? How did you become interested in rocks? Your post was not too long, say as much as you want. Isn't that interesting that hospitals seem to be a world all its own and yet I am lonely in and out of there. Wounds do tend to heal however, not every disease can be cured and not every injury can be healed.

I do not know how long I have been pretending. How odd. It seems as if it has been forever but it has not been constant, there have been brief episodes of happiness. When I am low it is because I am thinking that I wish I was not alone and that I wish I had someone to talk to, to laugh with, etc.

I like to read the posts on this site. I visit here everyday. I like reading the posts.

Write soon

 

[jales]

well today was one of the most depressing days i've had in months.. i really thought for a second that i was past this stage of my life. I cried for basically the entire day...but the tears are just water its the pain that comes with them that hurts.

i know there is something wrong with me ..im just losing faith that its something that can be fixed.

how was your day?

 

[seekingpeace]

I often wonder how I ended up this way. There have been days where I have tried to convince myself that I will always be lonely and to just get used to it and be happy. I usually only wind up even lonelier.

My mother thinks (my conclusion) is that if she talks to me everyday I will not be lonely. I let her believe that and at least one of us is sort of happy.

yes, I too am just taking it day by day. I am glad to hear that you have not given up on things getting better.

Sometimes when ur taking ti "day by day" you encounter one of those hard days. yesterday was one of those hard days for me, aside from my own personal pain i had the weight and guilt of the pain i cause the people around me.its a real hopeless feeling when ppl seem fed up of u and u cant help urself, i'm feeling a bit better now but that sense of burdening others still lingers with me. amidst all of this chaos i still try to remind myself that u gotta take it day by day.

 

[jales]

Ooh, that's very brave of you to go to the movies by yourself, Sarah and Evanescence. I LOVE movies, but I can't remember the last time I visited a cinema. I saw "A Knights Tale" alone around 5 years ago, but I've been to scared to go alone ever since ^^

It is not so bad if you go at an odd time of day to avoid the dinner and a movie date crowd.

a knights tale was a brilliant movie

after you go a couple of times on your own..its not that bad lol.

 

[evanescencefan91]

ya, i guess you could say you get use to it.

 

[Sarahlone]

well today was one of the most depressing days i've had in months.. i really thought for a second that i was past this stage of my life. I cried for basically the entire day...but the tears are just water its the pain that comes with them that hurts.

i know there is something wrong with me ..im just losing faith that its something that can be fixed.

how was your day?

Oh Jales I am so sorry to hear about your bad day. I am all too familiar with the pain and the tears. I often think that there is something wrong with me also. I just wish somebody would come forward and explain it to me. Don't loose faith in the something good that is coming our way because there are times when that is all we have to cling to.

Today I ordered take out food and while I was waiting for my order, I looked around and noticed a man eating alone. I wondered if he was eating alone because he was alone and lonely. I have never been able to bring myself to dine out alone.

 

[Sarahlone]

I often wonder how I ended up this way. There have been days where I have tried to convince myself that I will always be lonely and to just get used to it and be happy. I usually only wind up even lonelier.

My mother thinks (my conclusion) is that if she talks to me everyday I will not be lonely. I let her believe that and at least one of us is sort of happy.

yes, I too am just taking it day by day. I am glad to hear that you have not given up on things getting better.

Sometimes when ur taking ti "day by day" you encounter one of those hard days. yesterday was one of those hard days for me, aside from my own personal pain i had the weight and guilt of the pain i cause the people around me.its a real hopeless feeling when ppl seem fed up of u and u cant help urself, i'm feeling a bit better now but that sense of burdening others still lingers with me. amidst all of this chaos i still try to remind myself that u gotta take it day by day.

I think the good part about taking it day by day is that when you get to the hard days......you only have to do one at a time. I have noticed that people also get fed up if they can not help you.

How are you causing pain to those around you?

 

[jales]

I'm okay now.. I have some really good internet friends.. I dont know what I'd do with em.

You know my brother eats out alone all the time.. and he is the most 'not lonely' person I know. He does it to get peace he says.. When I say he's not lonely I mean.. he too many friends, a girlfriend and basically a life lol... because he has interest and has stuff to do all the time. But yet still he would go out and have dinner and a movie by himself..and he says that he enjoys it. He enjoys the break from people

I dont know if this guy is like my brother or not though. I think with me and dinning out alone.. I could/have do it but I eat really fast because otherwise I feel like I'm wasting time. lol.

Are you off from work this weekend? How is everything at your end?

well today was one of the most depressing days i've had in months.. i really thought for a second that i was past this stage of my life. I cried for basically the entire day...but the tears are just water its the pain that comes with them that hurts.

i know there is something wrong with me ..im just losing faith that its something that can be fixed.

how was your day?

Oh Jales I am so sorry to hear about your bad day. I am all too familiar with the pain and the tears. I often think that there is something wrong with me also. I just wish somebody would come forward and explain it to me. Don't loose faith in the something good that is coming our way because there are times when that is all we have to cling to.

Today I ordered take out food and while I was waiting for my order, I looked around and noticed a man eating alone. I wondered if he was eating alone because he was alone and lonely. I have never been able to bring myself to dine out alone.

 

[Sarahlone]

I'm okay now.. I have some really good internet friends.. I dont know what I'd do with em.

You know my brother eats out alone all the time.. and he is the most 'not lonely' person I know. He does it to get peace he says.. When I say he's not lonely I mean.. he too many friends, a girlfriend and basically a life lol... because he has interest and has stuff to do all the time. But yet still he would go out and have dinner and a movie by himself..and he says that he enjoys it. He enjoys the break from people

I dont know if this guy is like my brother or not though. I think with me and dinning out alone.. I could/have do it but I eat really fast because otherwise I feel like I'm wasting time. lol.

Are you off from work this weekend? How is everything at your end?

I am glad you are feeling better. I only have Friday off and then I have to work Sat, Sun and Monday. I have worked the last three weekends in a row. I am working from 11 am to 11 pm. I generally get my days off during the week.

Everything is going as well as can be expected and actually a little better now because I have found someone to talk to/correspond with. For me, the topic does not matter, it is the exchange of ideas and thoughts that I like.

What are your weekend plans?

 

[Hijacc]

ello

 

[Sarahlone]

ello

Hi

 

[jales]

I am glad you are feeling better. I only have Friday off and then I have to work Sat, Sun and Monday. I have worked the last three weekends in a row. I am working from 11 am to 11 pm. I generally get my days off during the week.

Everything is going as well as can be expected and actually a little better now because I have found someone to talk to/correspond with. For me, the topic does not matter, it is the exchange of ideas and thoughts that I like.

What are your weekend plans?

woah.. from 11am to 11pm? You have got to be rich. That's 12 hours a day.. I would complain all day long if it was me. Yes it's nice to have someone to communicate with.

my plan for this weekend is to study...a lot (for all the times i wasnt studying you know lol)

its a lot of work...and its only 1am but i'm sleepy sucks
i'm gonna do an hour again then sleep.

how was work today? hey do you want to post in PM's or so.. because I was thinking to ask you more about yourself but didnt know if you would want to post it in the thread...

okay ttys.
Jales

 

[Wishtobemyself]

Hi, Sarah. I'm not talkative, but you can talk to me if you want.

 

[Sarahlone]

Hello wishtobemyself, I will talk to you. In fact, I don't think that I can ever have too many friends. I have met some nice people here. How did you find this forum and do you like it so far? How do you spend you days and evenings?

 

[exeronorama]

[email protected]

it wud be fun to have an ePAL who cn understand my feelings just the same way!

 

[SadRabbit]

Hey sarah...hummm. Hi and welcome to the forum. A rather late welcome. Hee...if you don't mind me at all, we could be [email protected]

 

[Sanal]

diggin up the old threads wabbit? lol sup sarah?