Dating websites

[Carljones90]

So I've been on a few dating websites (Match.com and POF) for quite some time now, I would say since the beginning of this year but yet I have had such little luck with them that it's really getting to me now. I did have some success a while back where I went on a few dates with one girl and nearly went on a date with another recently.

The thing that get's me though is that I am constantly sending messages to lots of girls, trying to make them witty, funny and interesting but I barely get any replies back. I think out of the 30-50+ girls I have tried to speak to, 2 have written back and maybe 1 I have actually striked up a conversation with. The rest are just more views on my profile so I can't help feeling that I'm going wrong somewhere and I don't know where. I know and understand that not everyone will be interested but it's quite aggravating to see all these people viewing me but no one actually reply. I'm going out of my way to make the effort, at least try to meet me halfway or something.

So um yea...little advice here maybe?

 

[putter65]

So I've been on a few dating websites (Match.com and POF) for quite some time now, I would say since the beginning of this year but yet I have had such little luck with them that it's really getting to me now. I did have some success a while back where I went on a few dates with one girl and nearly went on a date with another recently.

The thing that get's me though is that I am constantly sending messages to lots of girls, trying to make them witty, funny and interesting but I barely get any replies back. I think out of the 30-50+ girls I have tried to speak to, 2 have written back and maybe 1 I have actually striked up a conversation with. The rest are just more views on my profile so I can't help feeling that I'm going wrong somewhere and I don't know where. I know and understand that not everyone will be interested but it's quite aggravating to see all these people viewing me but no one actually reply. I'm going out of my way to make the effort, at least try to meet me halfway or something.

So um yea...little advice here maybe?

my advice is forget about dating sites and go out and meet women.

I know what you mean, Ive sent dozens of messages, winks, interest whatever - no interest whatsoever.

Have you had any scammers bothering you ?

It's all I get, loads of them wanting to know me and sending me their emails addresses. I think the chances of finding someone on these sites is nil, for me anyway.

The added extra kick in the balls is when women on dating sites complain about the men on there. Where are they ? Where are the nice ones ? blah, blah.

Makes me sick.

I think the best bet is to meet women face to face and hope you come across somebody who you like and more important, they like you back.

Good Luck !

 

[Carljones90]

I'm usually out most saturday nights with my mate and I do meet women so it's not uncommon, I'm getting there slowly but surely. I've had no scammers or creepy people bothering me so I guess that's good.

Oh yes that's the worst bit, they say they just want a nice guy to talk to and have a good conversation with. I present myself but they never bleeding reply! Such hypocrisy it's unreal...

 

[friendlyheart]

I know how you feel, when i started using a dating site i wrote mesages to guys and barely any of them wrote back so i eventually stopped writing and if/when someone writes me i'll write back.

I guess dating sites are really about giving a lot of effort in and hoping for the best outcome, without too much success but a nice message ever now and then.

What i like when a guy sends me a message is to see he read my profile, to see he's interested in my personality and has something in common with me. I like when they do take the time to write a message and it's not just the hi how are you message, i sometimes can't bother to answer to those.

I hope you have more luck in the future

 

[Unwanted94]

I have been through sooo many accounts on these **** dating websites. Very very little luck,and no one even messages me. Of course, I don't message anybody anymore. Though, I used to message people all the time, but it just gives me the feeling like I do in real life;desolated. It makes me feel rejected and worthless, so I just don't deal with it. I just wait for someone to message me,and that within itself is highly improbable. I don't even know what's wrong with me either...

 

[putter65]

I have been through sooo many accounts on these **** dating websites. Very very little luck,and no one even messages me. Of course, I don't message anybody anymore. Though, I used to message people all the time, but it just gives me the feeling like I do in real life;desolated. It makes me feel rejected and worthless, so I just don't deal with it. I just wait for someone to message me,and that within itself is highly improbable. I don't even know what's wrong with me either...

It's awfull to think the only 'interest' I get is either scammers or fake messages trying to get to join a dating site. My junk email account is full of 'you have a new message' emails from some hot blond who is never really going to be interested.

When I'm bored I tend to join a dating site just to look thru the women on there. I often don't bother filling in my profile and I hardly put a photo on there. Yet I get emails galore, of course to view these message I have to pay money. It's all a con.

 

[Unwanted94]

I have been through sooo many accounts on these **** dating websites. Very very little luck,and no one even messages me. Of course, I don't message anybody anymore. Though, I used to message people all the time, but it just gives me the feeling like I do in real life;desolated. It makes me feel rejected and worthless, so I just don't deal with it. I just wait for someone to message me,and that within itself is highly improbable. I don't even know what's wrong with me either...

It's awfull to think the only 'interest' I get is either scammers or fake messages trying to get to join a dating site. My junk email account is full of 'you have a new message' emails from some hot blond who is never really going to be interested.

When I'm bored I tend to join a dating site just to look thru the women on there. I often don't bother filling in my profile and I hardly put a photo on there. Yet I get emails galore, of course to view these message I have to pay money. It's all a con.

What sites are you on?? Hmm. I hear you on the lack of profile and pics.
It's a shame really. I used to put a lot of photos on my page. Now, I'll just post 1 or 2 and won't even bother filling in the 'about me' for a list of reasons. To me, it just seems like a bit of a waste of time. It's like playing the lottery when you think about it.

 

[putter65]

I have been through sooo many accounts on these **** dating websites. Very very little luck,and no one even messages me. Of course, I don't message anybody anymore. Though, I used to message people all the time, but it just gives me the feeling like I do in real life;desolated. It makes me feel rejected and worthless, so I just don't deal with it. I just wait for someone to message me,and that within itself is highly improbable. I don't even know what's wrong with me either...

It's awfull to think the only 'interest' I get is either scammers or fake messages trying to get to join a dating site. My junk email account is full of 'you have a new message' emails from some hot blond who is never really going to be interested.

When I'm bored I tend to join a dating site just to look thru the women on there. I often don't bother filling in my profile and I hardly put a photo on there. Yet I get emails galore, of course to view these message I have to pay money. It's all a con.

What sites are you on?? Hmm. I hear you on the lack of profile and pics.
It's a shame really. I used to put a lot of photos on my page. Now, I'll just post 1 or 2 and won't even bother filling in the 'about me' for a list of reasons. To me, it just seems like a bit of a waste of time. It's like playing the lottery when you think about it.

even the so called respectable ones; e harmany and match dot com, i have filled in all the pages of crap and a few minutes later you get a 'match' - of course to view their 'message' or profile you need to sign up and cough up some money.

A few months ago I typed 'ugly dating sites' on google and was surprized to find something. I did join that, full profile, photo, signed up and paid money for £40 for a couple of months. That's where I met that russian woman who scammed me out of £800. No english women were interested.

 

[PlayingSolo]

My advise: try OKCupid dot com. It's (imo) by far the best dating website, and it's completely free. I've never received any kind of spam or anything.

Don't be surprised if most girls don't message you back. I think you just have to understand that most women on there get 20+ messages per day, and it's almost certain that they won't reply to all of them. They just pick out a few good messages from guys that they think are attractive and reply to those and ignore the rest. That's kind of the way I always thought of it.

I've been on various sites over the years myself. Talked to quite a few girls. Only ever went on one date (i ended up not really liking her). I asked another girl out and she initially said ok, but then canceled and kept hinting that she didn't really want to meet and (i guess) didn't actually want to talk to me. But hey, she was nice enough not to ignore my messages. I don't really take these sites seriously any more. I've kind of given up on the whole thing, but thats just me. I think its pretty hard to get to know someone through a profile page, so when a girl views your profile I don't think they're really seeing who you are. Which might make it that much harder to get a date.

Anyways, good luck in your search

---

I just realized how negative that whole post sounded. I'm not meaning to turn you off of the whole online dating thing, just putting my experiences out there. I do hope you find someone, I know there's plenty of people out there that have had success with it.

 

[putter65]

My advise: try OKCupid dot com. It's (imo) by far the best dating website, and it's completely free. I've never received any kind of spam or anything.

Don't be surprised if most girls don't message you back. I think you just have to understand that most women on there get 20+ messages per day, and it's almost certain that they won't reply to all of them. They just pick out a few good messages from guys that they think are attractive and reply to those and ignore the rest. That's kind of the way I always thought of it.

I've been on various sites over the years myself. Talked to quite a few girls. Only ever went on one date (i ended up not really liking her). I asked another girl out and she initially said ok, but then canceled and kept hinting that she didn't really want to meet and (i guess) didn't actually want to talk to me. But hey, she was nice enough not to ignore my messages. I don't really take these sites seriously any more. I've kind of given up on the whole thing, but thats just me. I think its pretty hard to get to know someone through a profile page, so when a girl views your profile I don't think they're really seeing who you are. Which might make it that much harder to get a date.

Anyways, good luck in your search

---

I just realized how negative that whole post sounded. I'm not meaning to turn you off of the whole online dating thing, just putting my experiences out there. I do hope you find someone, I know there's plenty of people out there that have had success with it.

---

i will try ok cupid then. What are the odds I get a message from a scammer within 5 minutes ?

 

[Unwanted94]

I have been through sooo many accounts on these **** dating websites. Very very little luck,and no one even messages me. Of course, I don't message anybody anymore. Though, I used to message people all the time, but it just gives me the feeling like I do in real life;desolated. It makes me feel rejected and worthless, so I just don't deal with it. I just wait for someone to message me,and that within itself is highly improbable. I don't even know what's wrong with me either...

It's awfull to think the only 'interest' I get is either scammers or fake messages trying to get to join a dating site. My junk email account is full of 'you have a new message' emails from some hot blond who is never really going to be interested.

When I'm bored I tend to join a dating site just to look thru the women on there. I often don't bother filling in my profile and I hardly put a photo on there. Yet I get emails galore, of course to view these message I have to pay money. It's all a con.

What sites are you on?? Hmm. I hear you on the lack of profile and pics.
It's a shame really. I used to put a lot of photos on my page. Now, I'll just post 1 or 2 and won't even bother filling in the 'about me' for a list of reasons. To me, it just seems like a bit of a waste of time. It's like playing the lottery when you think about it.

even the so called respectable ones; e harmany and match dot com, i have filled in all the pages of crap and a few minutes later you get a 'match' - of course to view their 'message' or profile you need to sign up and cough up some money.

A few months ago I typed 'ugly dating sites' on google and was surprized to find something. I did join that, full profile, photo, signed up and paid money for £40 for a couple of months. That's where I met that russian woman who scammed me out of £800. No english women were interested.

I don't understand how the fresia people still date these days. Dating isn't what it once was. It's all messed up. It's such a waste of time.

 

[blackdot]

I think out of the 30-50+ girls I have tried to speak to, 2 have written back and maybe 1 I have actually struck up a conversation with.

The things to remember about dating websites. Women in general create an account and immediately get swamped by guys sending them messages. Men in general create and account and get very few messages.
A lot of women expect men to start the conversation. Since they get swamped with messages, they usually only respond to the ones that they see the most promise with and even then they may only respond once or twice before saying they are too busy to be on dating websites and then vanish.

 

[Carljones90]

I guess it's just like real life really, you get rejected tons of times but the one person makes it all worth it. So lately I've had two replies, one who seemed to actually engage in conversation (or want to) and the other just replied 'Are you serious? :/' which was not quite the answer I was expecting.

Oh well, move on and all that...

 

[PlayingSolo]

I think out of the 30-50+ girls I have tried to speak to, 2 have written back and maybe 1 I have actually struck up a conversation with.

The things to remember about dating websites. Women in general create an account and immediately get swamped by guys sending them messages. Men in general create and account and get very few messages.
A lot of women expect men to start the conversation. Since they get swamped with messages, they usually only respond to the ones that they see the most promise with and even then they may only respond once or twice before saying they are too busy to be on dating websites and then vanish.

Yeah that's pretty much what I was trying to say lol

 

[Antihero]

I thought this might be helpful here... The Founder of OKCupid, Christian Rudder, wrote a great blog post on the methodologies and crappy business practices of the Pay Dating sites, which then disappeared when Match.com bought them. Here is a link to a mirror. Enjoy.

http://www.columbia.edu/~jhb2147/why-you-should-never-pay-for-online-dating.html

 

[PlayingSolo]

I thought this might be helpful here... The Founder of OKCupid, Christian Rudder, wrote a great blog post on the methodologies and crappy business practices of the Pay Dating sites, which then disappeared when Match.com bought them. Here is a link to a mirror. Enjoy.

http://www.columbia.edu/~jhb2147/why-you-should-never-pay-for-online-dating.html

Wow, that's a really good article, I had no idea. All the more reason I won't pay for a dating site

 

[Unwanted94]

So I've been on a few dating websites (Match.com and POF) for quite some time now, I would say since the beginning of this year but yet I have had such little luck with them that it's really getting to me now. I did have some success a while back where I went on a few dates with one girl and nearly went on a date with another recently.

The thing that get's me though is that I am constantly sending messages to lots of girls, trying to make them witty, funny and interesting but I barely get any replies back. I think out of the 30-50+ girls I have tried to speak to, 2 have written back and maybe 1 I have actually striked up a conversation with. The rest are just more views on my profile so I can't help feeling that I'm going wrong somewhere and I don't know where. I know and understand that not everyone will be interested but it's quite aggravating to see all these people viewing me but no one actually reply. I'm going out of my way to make the effort, at least try to meet me halfway or something.

So um yea...little advice here maybe?

That's exactly how it is with me on dating websites. I get ignored by every guy that I message and it actually pisses me off. If I do happen to get a response, they say very little and I get the vibe that they're being really indifferent and aren't interested. Then I'm thinking "Why the fresia are you even on here then!?". I mean, really? Why join an online dating website if you're going to be so apathetic and dry when somebody shows a slight interest in you? I don't know. I'm unwanted. Anyway... I would just move away from online dating. There's very little hope in it. Sorry.

 

[Gutted]

Try not to worry about yourself. There is nothing wrong with you. When you think about how relationships can change you life, you realize you have to be patient. It makes sense that people are fussy due to this, but I am with anyone who doesn't like it when a person says "They're looking for a nice guy/girl" and then when you add them they say nothing.

Also, try Oasis.co.uk if you can. It's 100% free. I actually used it to see what Dating sites are like. I never met any scammers. But I did meet some nice people, some crazy people and a lot of gay guys lol.

 

[Unwanted94]

My advise: try OKCupid dot com. It's (imo) by far the best dating website, and it's completely free. I've never received any kind of spam or anything.

Don't be surprised if most girls don't message you back. I think you just have to understand that most women on there get 20+ messages per day, and it's almost certain that they won't reply to all of them. They just pick out a few good messages from guys that they think are attractive and reply to those and ignore the rest. That's kind of the way I always thought of it.

I've been on various sites over the years myself. Talked to quite a few girls. Only ever went on one date (i ended up not really liking her). I asked another girl out and she initially said ok, but then canceled and kept hinting that she didn't really want to meet and (i guess) didn't actually want to talk to me. But hey, she was nice enough not to ignore my messages. I don't really take these sites seriously any more. I've kind of given up on the whole thing, but thats just me. I think its pretty hard to get to know someone through a profile page, so when a girl views your profile I don't think they're really seeing who you are. Which might make it that much harder to get a date.

Anyways, good luck in your search

---

I just realized how negative that whole post sounded. I'm not meaning to turn you off of the whole online dating thing, just putting my experiences out there. I do hope you find someone, I know there's plenty of people out there that have had success with it.

---

i will try ok cupid then. What are the odds I get a message from a scammer within 5 minutes ?

---

From my experience, okcupid is worse. You may not get any spam, but you probably won't get any messages at all. You're better off on pof. Because literally;NO ONE messages me on okcupid,and I've been through like...4 accounts. There's something about that site. It really sucks. On pof, I would receive messages at first,and then all the sudden, everyone just stop messaging me.

 

[putter65]

My advise: try OKCupid dot com. It's (imo) by far the best dating website, and it's completely free. I've never received any kind of spam or anything.

Don't be surprised if most girls don't message you back. I think you just have to understand that most women on there get 20+ messages per day, and it's almost certain that they won't reply to all of them. They just pick out a few good messages from guys that they think are attractive and reply to those and ignore the rest. That's kind of the way I always thought of it.

I've been on various sites over the years myself. Talked to quite a few girls. Only ever went on one date (i ended up not really liking her). I asked another girl out and she initially said ok, but then canceled and kept hinting that she didn't really want to meet and (i guess) didn't actually want to talk to me. But hey, she was nice enough not to ignore my messages. I don't really take these sites seriously any more. I've kind of given up on the whole thing, but thats just me. I think its pretty hard to get to know someone through a profile page, so when a girl views your profile I don't think they're really seeing who you are. Which might make it that much harder to get a date.

Anyways, good luck in your search

---

I just realized how negative that whole post sounded. I'm not meaning to turn you off of the whole online dating thing, just putting my experiences out there. I do hope you find someone, I know there's plenty of people out there that have had success with it.

---

i will try ok cupid then. What are the odds I get a message from a scammer within 5 minutes ?

---

From my experience, okcupid is worse. You may not get any spam, but you probably won't get any messages at all. You're better off on pof. Because literally;NO ONE messages me on okcupid,and I've been through like...4 accounts. There's something about that site. It really sucks. On pof, I would receive messages at first,and then all the sudden, everyone just stop messaging me.

---

I can't be arsed to waste my time.

On my russian site, I get between 5 and 10 women writing to me every day or showing interest. Why the difference ? My photo is the same and so is my profile.

The answer is unless a woman is after scamming me out of my money, they are not interested.