Disclaimer: I'm completely insane.

[Solace]

Ok so. I've been having issues lately. I've made a post on here about how I feel like I'm waiting for someone, expecting someone. Missing someone so intensely. But I don't know who it is.

Disclaimer: I already know i'm insane. I'm coping and dealing with it. So just bear with me. I just feel like I need to talk about it cause I can't in real life.

I'm always having weird experiences. feeling people tap me on the shoulder, hearing music in my head, hearing the door open or the phone ring when it didn't, seeing strange figures watching me, not to mention all the every day stuff like hearing voices and fighting paranoia and delusions and stuff.

Once in a while though I get these memories that aren't mine.

Well every night I get lonely and feel like I'm missing someone but I don't know who. Sometimes I even cry.

Well last night I found myself suddenly feeling like I was somewhere else. Completely whisked away. I was in the room, yes. I didn't really go anywhere. But it's like when you're heading to work or something and you suddenly remember your vivid dream from the night before? For an instant you're not anywhere, you're back in your dream remembering everything, back in that weird castle you dreamed about where you were a knight only your armor was made out of cheese or something. Then you blink and are back in your car going "what the hell?".

That's what these memories are like. I remembered suddenly, the anguish of being separated from your people, of being scattered in strange lands and not being known. Suddenly I was sobbing over this. And then I came to my senses and was like "what the hell!?"

But hey. look it's 1:30 and i'm just having a weird episode.

I feel like if I don't figure out some answers to all this crap i'm gonna end up believing something weird. And I hate that the only places anyone talks about this kind of stuff is on weird psychic sites. Aren't there any normal people that have weird stuff happen to them? I don't believe in all that weird stuff. I honestly don't! No problem to people who do. I just think it's weird.

Anyway.... please no one tell me i'm an indigo child or some other stuff like that. I'm liable to believe it and I don't want to.

Just. I don't even know. Just thanks for letting me ramble.

 

[alonerly]

For the wisking away part...Maybe you were holding your breath and your brain was being deprived of oxygen causing your synapses to fire rapidly and subsequently sending your mind into a dreamlike state?

 

[Spare]

When I was little my parents 'gave away' our two dogs, because they were always fighting. I have since come to wonder if one didn't actually end up killing the other. Anyway, that night after I'd gone to bed I saw Ira, the one we'd had the longest and whom I'd loved the most, come trotting into my room. His tail was wagging and he had a big doggie grin on his face, and the whole of his head was cut up and bloody. But there he was, coming in to check on me, as he'd always done when I was small.

I know this was most likely a dream, brought on by a little boy's sadness over a companion gone forever. But at the time, indeed for years, I felt it had been real, that I had been awake, that Ira was checking in on me one last time. I sometimes wonder about it still.

If there's anything we can be sure of it's how little we actually know about the world, the universe, and the human psyche. We can make some educated guesses, most of them very likely acurate, but whose to say what is or isn't possible in the grand scheme of things? God only knows.

I'm not by any means suggesting these experiences you've been having are real. They probably aren't; who am I to make such an assessment? If it were me, I'd be every bit as concerned as you, if not more so (overall, I'm a pretty conservative guy). I'm just saying, don't be so quick to call yourself insane. The human mind truly is the final frontier.

 

[cubatown88]

this is weird or deja vu because this has been happening to me since I was 11 years old, the year that I turned 11 was filled with moments in which I felt like I was missing something then I realized that I am missing someone or some place I even had dreams of this place that looks like a school but not so much and in this place I know everyone and everything and when I wake up I say to myself ( in my head of course) "I'm going to be late" this is when I realize that this place doesn't exist and that I am not in a rush. I always wonder about that but most importantly I worry about the person that I am missing I have cried about it and basically would be depressed over it for many days I feel like I have to find this person or at least find out why I feel this way.

glad to know I am not the only one.

 

[Solace]

heh. I can't believe I posted that.

Thanks for the feedback though. I just don't want to feel like I have to keep all this secret.

Today i've been really forgetful. My mom called to say something and I talked with her and then I hung up, and I had to call back 2 mins later to ask her what she said. LOL.

I ended up sleeping till 12 this afternoon. Which was nice I guess.

I had a cool dream where I could fly really high above a really big city. At one point I realized it didn't matter if those people I was running from caught me because I was dreaming and decided to have some fun zipping around overhead. For some reason no one saw me flying except the bad guys.

Fairly often in my dreams I realize I am dreaming. Usually I forget after a while.

It is good to know you're not the only one, isn't it Cubatown?

I should probably eat something.

 

[ledchick]

I hear things, see things, experience events, have memories that are not mine, have conversations with people that I have never met...etc. I am classified by others as schizophrenic....and all sorts of other 'labels' etc
I truly believe, and have since I was a small child, that I was placed here by an alien race, to observe. I also believe that they will come back for me and that I am watched over. All my suffering is for purpose. My life is hard and it is all for a purpose. I know it sounds crazy but it is what I believe and I will be vindicated one day. I believe I belong to a race called the Nephalim part angel part human.

 

[torontonian]

At least you people know you're alone because you're schizophrenics and people do notice