Does anyone here feel like a loser?

[Grackle]

I went through all my teens and 20's feeling like a loser or some how defected because I didn't have a girlfriend, wasn't married, didn't have children. To this day I still have comments and looks that suggest pity or shame that I'm still single. Society and family placed that on me.

 

[Triple Bogey]

no just different to everybody else

 

[Melsaldi]

i do

 

[Dexter]

I actually never thought of myself as a loser.
Why should someone consider him/herself a loser anyway? Just because someone is different compared to other people or just because someone didn't achieve the things he/she wanted to achieve? To me these are no reasons to feel like a loser!

I have spent alot of time here on the forum and I can definetely say that no one here has a reason to feel like a loser.

 

[AmytheTemperamental]

I actually never thought of myself as a loser.
Why should someone consider him/herself a loser anyway? Just because someone is different compared to other people or just because someone didn't achieve the things he/she wanted to achieve? To me these are no reasons to feel like a loser!

I have spent alot of time here on the forum and I can definetely say that no one here has a reason to feel like a loser.

I have personally never looked at life that way. Great way of thinking!

 

[Sophie99]

Pretty much my entire life, yeah. And I'm middle-aged.

I'm really trying to fight that feeling now. I'm trying to act as my own therapist (since I can't afford one) and figure out where this feeling came from. It's easy to tell myself that I'm not a loser and I shouldn't feel that way anymore, but if I really want that message to penetrate to the core of my soul, I need to figure out WHY I started feeling like a loser in the first place.

So I'm working on it. But it's really hard, and every little setback and rejection, or perceived rejection, makes it even more difficult.

 

[Ironhorse]

I'm the definition of LOSER. If you look in the dictionary it's my photo that appears.

 

[Outcast]

I do feel like a loser at times. But some of it is my personality, I care too much about what other people think. So the first negative thing I hear bums me out. At the end of the day you should only value the opinion of those close to you and most importantly your own.

But I understand sometimes it is hard.

 

[Calla]

My take on this is that it's down to social perception, it's why I view myself a loser.

To put it simply, society expects an individual to reach certain stages in their lifetime. Being a 25-year-old male who has never come close to any form of romantic relationship, I would suggest that I am roughly ten years behind where I should be. So, if I was introduced to a stranger and I had to pass on that fact to them, I imagine that they would perceive me to be a 'loser'. I have failed society's expectation and do not fit within the social norm.

 

[insomniac779]

Definitely.

I can't say that there's any aspect of my life that I'm particularly proud of.

I have a job that I don't particulalrly care about one way or the other and when I leave it I get to come to an empty apartment and no one I can even call or text. Sucks.

 

[simhthmss]

yes

 

[robinstoke]

yes

Same

 

[Hearmenow2012]

I've had thoughts that things probably weren't going to get any better and how could I have let myself get like this, but I've never thought that I was a loser.

 

[WildernessWildChild]

DAMMIT PEOPLE!

It bugs the Hell out of me there are so many here that're so down about themselves. None of us are perfect, many of us see the 'ideal' lives others have that we don't have, we might not have amazing careers or the love of a partner that we never question but WE ALL HAVE POSSIBILITIES. My life ain't perfect and I'm pretty damned lonely but I'm working towards a better one and there's no way I'm gonna find it if I'm down on myself.

I think this thread should be CLOSED and DELETED....

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Even worse- the guy who started this thread hasn't been here for about nine months and it's still encouraging negativity....

 

[ringwood]

DAMMIT PEOPLE!

It bugs the Hell out of me there are so many here that're so down about themselves. None of us are perfect, many of us see the 'ideal' lives others have that we don't have, we might not have amazing careers or the love of a partner that we never question but WE ALL HAVE POSSIBILITIES. My life ain't perfect and I'm pretty damned lonely but I'm working towards a better one and there's no way I'm gonna find it if I'm down on myself.

I think this thread should be CLOSED and DELETED....

---

Even worse- the guy who started this thread hasn't been here for about nine months and it's still encouraging negativity....

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Yep...totally agree. How about starting a thread, "Does anyone here feel like a winner?" - the constant poor-me attitudes around here really bug me too...especially when, despite the wonderful positive advice from others, some people just insist on going around in circles in their head, never really trying to change how they think. It's frustrating.

 

[robinstoke]

I dont think everybody looks at it the same way. There are a lot of sexy successful people who could be viewed as losers. I dont hate myself and I dont have a complex I just fit the term. Id rather read a book or listen to my tunes than go out on my night off sometimes.

 

[ringwood]

I dont think everybody looks at it the same way. There are a lot of sexy successful people who could be viewed as losers. I dont hate myself and I dont have a complex I just fit the term. Id rather read a book or listen to my tunes than go out on my night off sometimes.

Hang on...so you're saying that because you'd rather read a book and listen to tunes than go out you're happy to term yourself a 'loser'?! Forgive me if I'm mistaken, but this is what you're getting at, right?

I don't get how preferring a quiet night in is such a negative thing to do? Explain....

 

[robinstoke]

I dont think everybody looks at it the same way. There are a lot of sexy successful people who could be viewed as losers. I dont hate myself and I dont have a complex I just fit the term. Id rather read a book or listen to my tunes than go out on my night off sometimes.

Hang on...so you're saying that because you'd rather read a book and listen to tunes than go out you're happy to term yourself a 'loser'?! Forgive me if I'm mistaken, but this is what you're getting at, right?

I don't get how preferring a quiet night in is such a negative thing to do? Explain....

Well lol in the grand scheme of things where the cool kids on facebook rule the social world I guess I'd consider that being a loser. Not that I have a problem with that at all. Really not at all. Its just a label..

 

[Forever Misanthrope]

Not really. But look at the site I'm on.

 

[robinstoke]

Good point