Does this site work?

[randomman]

I'm very attracted by the idea of this site. However, it does scare me a little. I've suffered from depression and loneliness for most of my life, since I was 12, and I'm almost 25 now. However, the usual answer to that kind of issue is just "buck up, suck it in, it'll get better".

That might work for some people, but it hasn't worked for me. I have a multitude of passive, unhealthy, or just plain useless coping methods that I won't go into here. Basically, how do I break out of this loneliness? I am considered by most people to be an intelligent man, and normally I solve my problems by simply thinking them through.

This, I can't.

It's been 12 years since I felt I belonged to anything, or anyone.

It's been ten years since I was happy for longer than a week or two at a time.

Well, that's just me. Again, maybe I'm just complaining and need to be told to buck up, I really don't have any answers. I'd just like any ideas that anyone has.

 

[nerdygirl]

What does it mean for the site to "work"? I do find that I have been less lonesome while here, if that's what you're wondering.

 

[Just_Some_Dude]

it doesn't work.

as a matter of fact, i can't even see this topic.

 

[nerdygirl]

Oh, erm... welcome, by the way!

 

[EveWasFramed]

That's cuz you're drunk, JSD.

Welcome to the forum, Random.

 

[randomman]

Well I suppose what I really mean, is, does that site really solve the issue, or can it?

For instance, there's a website for people who are involuntarily celibate. Obviously, if those people get the right advice, they could solve the problem!

What really distresses me is that loneliness and depression has been a constant factor in my life ever since I could shave. I'm not likely to ever stop shaving, but am I ever likely to really have that circle of close relationships around me that would potentially cure this depression/loneliness?

I suppose as you guys don't really know me that well it's impossible for you to specifically say.

I really just want to know has anyone else here really come from what they'd consider a black pit of loneliness into the light of feeling good, every day, even when alone?

I know this is a bit emo to write, but heck, it's a forum for lonely people, I really think that we're allowed to be a bit emo!

P.S. Thank you for welcoming me and poking fun at my post! I like a good ribbing now and then.

 

[sinisterplague]

Well I suppose what I really mean, is, does that site really solve the issue, or can it?

For instance, there's a website for people who are involuntarily celibate. Obviously, if those people get the right advice, they could solve the problem!

What really distresses me is that loneliness and depression has been a constant factor in my life ever since I could shave. I'm not likely to ever stop shaving, but am I ever likely to really have that circle of close relationships around me that would potentially cure this depression/loneliness?

I suppose as you guys don't really know me that well it's impossible for you to specifically say.

I really just want to know has anyone else here really come from what they'd consider a black pit of loneliness into the light of feeling good, every day, even when alone?

I know this is a bit emo to write, but heck, it's a forum for lonely people, I really think that we're allowed to be a bit emo!

P.S. Thank you for welcoming me and poking fun at my post! I like a good ribbing now and then.

I'm new here too. And emo was SOOO 2006! Meaning...I'm hoping in this new decade we can be emo without being called "emo." Cause Hawthorne Heights is a terrible terrible group.

 

[mintymint]

If you want a place where you'll find friendly encouragement and support, a place where you can freely express yourself, a place where you can meet all sorts of people who may share some of your experiences, a place where you can perhaps make friends and socialize with others in a generally civilized setting, then this site ain't too bad. But nothing you find here is going to "solve" your problems for you. That's your responsibility to get the help you need and put yourself out there. This site can certainly be a first step though. What I'm saying is that while it certainly isn't a cure for your issues, it can support you on your way... Welcome to ALL

 

[randomman]

I suppose solve isn't a great word. Obviously I need to do this myself. However, I just seem to fail at actually making connections with people. I can do it online, which is probably why I'm again online and looking for help.

Not to be self-pitying but I think that many of the people from my generation (and all those born after mine) will be potential victims to loneliness that is alien to that of our parents - loneliness triggered by overly reaching out online, and therefore unconsciously severing true personal connections.

 

[Badjedidude]

Welcome to the site, random. As for whether it "works" or not....it depends on what you're expecting it to do. If you're expecting it to solve all of your problems and magically make you socially fit and popular...then NO, it doesn't work.

But if you're expecting it to give you a place to chat online with some nice people and waste some of your free hours...then yeah, it'll probably work.

----Steve

 

[EveWasFramed]

Random...you may not find a "solution" here, but you will likely find some support and some wonderful people to talk to, who have experienced similar things in their lives. I hope that you can find some common ground with some kindred souls while you're here.

Again, welcome.

 

[evanescencefan91]

Hey random man welcome to the forum, well this site has helped me a lot, it's given me company and confidence

and well just having someplace to kill time helps when I'm feeling down

anyways i hope it helps and i hope that you can find some happiness if not here then somewhere

 

[Samuel]

Welcome!

Works towards your goal, one step at a time. Better late than never.

 

[rdoearth]

I've suffered with depression for years as well, mostly I think on account of loneliness. I think this site will work at last a little bit if you allow it to. I would like t think personally I can rise above by depression and grief over the loss of my fiance, and meet someone new eventually. However I also have ongoing problems with social interactions myself so I know realistically speaking I may always have to deal with feelings of emptiness. Having just lost my job naturally I have more time to think about it right now, which is why I am here.