Embarrassed myself

[Tramp]

Thought I'd do something "nice" for my wife, who I've known for three years now. With our infant, it's hard to have a lot of time together or do anything fun together these days, so thought this would be a nice deviation from that.

My wife and I are in an interracial marriage. I wrote out the lyrics of a relatively famous song in my native tongue (not my lyrics, but the handwriting was mine - one up for originality?) and gave it to her to get it translated however she can, as the song portrays how I feel about her. I was thinking that if a woman did the same for me, I would be very touched and would try my best to figure out the meaning. I thought that my woman would feel the same and this would be a fun little game for us to play. Her prize for being able to successfully translate the song would be a small piece of art made by our infant son.

I thought it wouldn't be too hard, all she would have to do is scan the piece of paper and put it up on a forum or something, where someone could translate it for her, or even ask one of my friends who speaks the same language.

I didn't realize she would take offense to it. Her reaction kind of broke my heart, as she got pissed and threw something across the floor (the diaper she had just changed, lol). She said it was offensive as she didn't know the language. I guess I didn't think of it that way. I completely embarrassed myself and now realize this wasn't a good idea at all. It feels like I ruined Easter.

 

[Limlim]

Wait, you sang it to her while she was arm deep in poo? She was changing the diaper at the time?

 

[painter's radio]

Jeeze couldn't she just type it into google translate or something? Even though it's usually inaccurate! I think it was a nice idea and she is just being ungreatful. You may feel silly because it didn't work how you hoped, but it was a good idea and I know many girls who would find that very sweet.

 

[WildernessWildChild]

It was a well intentioned gesture on your part OP but I think it may have been more meaningful if you'd had it translated in advance- what you gave her was an unreadable jumble and instead of seeing it as the adventure you'd hoped for she saw it as work- you've got an infant at home, that's a full time job in itself, does she really have the time for trying to translate lyrics?

Bad timing as well- diaper changing hardly inspires romantic setting.

 

[duff]

Thought I'd do something "nice" for my wife, who I've known for three years now. With our infant, it's hard to have a lot of time together or do anything fun together these days, so thought this would be a nice deviation from that.

My wife and I are in an interracial marriage. I wrote out the lyrics of a relatively famous song in my native tongue (not my lyrics, but the handwriting was mine - one up for originality?) and gave it to her to get it translated however she can, as the song portrays how I feel about her. I was thinking that if a woman did the same for me, I would be very touched and would try my best to figure out the meaning. I thought that my woman would feel the same and this would be a fun little game for us to play. Her prize for being able to successfully translate the song would be a small piece of art made by our infant son.

I thought it wouldn't be too hard, all she would have to do is scan the piece of paper and put it up on a forum or something, where someone could translate it for her, or even ask one of my friends who speaks the same language.

I didn't realize she would take offense to it. Her reaction kind of broke my heart, as she got pissed and threw something across the floor (the diaper she had just changed, lol). She said it was offensive as she didn't know the language. I guess I didn't think of it that way. I completely embarrassed myself and now realize this wasn't a good idea at all. It feels like I ruined Easter.

well at least you know not to do anything like it in the future.

---

Thought I'd do something "nice" for my wife, who I've known for three years now. With our infant, it's hard to have a lot of time together or do anything fun together these days, so thought this would be a nice deviation from that.

My wife and I are in an interracial marriage. I wrote out the lyrics of a relatively famous song in my native tongue (not my lyrics, but the handwriting was mine - one up for originality?) and gave it to her to get it translated however she can, as the song portrays how I feel about her. I was thinking that if a woman did the same for me, I would be very touched and would try my best to figure out the meaning. I thought that my woman would feel the same and this would be a fun little game for us to play. Her prize for being able to successfully translate the song would be a small piece of art made by our infant son.

I thought it wouldn't be too hard, all she would have to do is scan the piece of paper and put it up on a forum or something, where someone could translate it for her, or even ask one of my friends who speaks the same language.

I didn't realize she would take offense to it. Her reaction kind of broke my heart, as she got pissed and threw something across the floor (the diaper she had just changed, lol). She said it was offensive as she didn't know the language. I guess I didn't think of it that way. I completely embarrassed myself and now realize this wasn't a good idea at all. It feels like I ruined Easter.

reading stuff like this makes me happy I'm single !

 

[Veruca]

I think that was a very sweet thing to do actually. Perhaps she was in a bad mood or something and that's why she reacted that way? Don't beat yourself up too much about it though, its still a nice gesture.

 

[ladyforsaken]

Hey *hugs* I'm sorry you feel embarrassed.

Like everyone else says, it was a nice gesture. Perhaps different people react differently, but she probably thought you'd take the extra step in translating the words for her. But try to learn her and see how you can do things that will make her happy.. I realise we can't change other people or the way they see things.. but we can work around it to make it work. More effort on our part.. but it's cos we love the significant other, right?

 

[Liam]

Wow. This is amazing. People call themselves intelligent creatures, yet look how horribly they struggle in terms of simple communication between eachother. I feel sorry that you had to marry someone who's getting so buttfrustrated only because she didn't know the language. Consider divorce. Really. If you two argue over such small things, if you can't communicate well, then what's the point? Sooner or later, things will escalate, you'll notice you grow apart from eachother and one of you will be devastated by the inevitable declaration "I don't love you anymore".

 

[Okiedokes]

It might have been because she'd have to look up the lyrics herself as well as changing a diaper. You did nothing wrong though..I'll put it that way. Since you felt you'd love that type of present yourself, you thought she'd feel the same way and it showed your love you wanted to share. Have you explained that to her? You can't control other peoples reactions though, don't feel like you did a bad thing. It was done with love. I suppose maybe you two could discuss different types of gifts you would like to receive for next time.

 

[WildernessWildChild]

Wow. This is amazing. People call themselves intelligent creatures, yet look how horribly they struggle in terms of simple communication between eachother. I feel sorry that you had to marry someone who's getting so buttfrustrated only because she didn't know the language. Consider divorce. Really. If you two argue over such small things, if you can't communicate well, then what's the point? Sooner or later, things will escalate, you'll notice you grow apart from eachother and one of you will be devastated by the inevitable declaration "I don't love you anymore".

I think I'd pass on this "advice"

 

[perfanoff]

Sorry that happened to you. Communication is definitely not easy - there will always be fouls sometimes. Maybe ask her how you can make it up to her?

 

[LonelyLola]

She may well have reacted that way just because of the situation- perhaps she was on her last nerve, stressed to the max and unable to handle it, then you do this incredibly wonderful gesture (because it was, thoughtful and caring) but because of the time it was presented it ended up making her feel worse instead of better.

I would just take care of the little one while you let her relax in a bath or with a tea and a book, or something, and then hug her and explain you just wanted to give her something personally from you.

 

[Liam]

Sorry that happened to you. Communication is definitely not easy - there will always be fouls sometimes. Maybe ask her how you can make it up to her?

lol
that stupid woman got offender for NO REASON and you're telling him to MAKE IT UP FOR HER?

jesus christ, this is just pathetic

 

[perfanoff]

It's not pathetic. She's his wife and it's not, it should never be a tug of war.

If you can't forgive your SO for offending you in isolated cases, you really wouldn't be able to handle any relationship. And it goes both ways.

Then there's this thing I've heard (I don't really have close friends who have children) that some women are unstable during and after pregnancy. Taking care of a baby is also living hell too, I've heard. For all we know, the wife could be pissed off because it would be more of a romantic gesture to change the diaper instead of her lol.

 

[painter's radio]

I'm inclined to agree with Liam (with the logic at least). If anyone should be making things up to anyone, it's her, to him. I don't usually pay much attention the whole alpha/beta thing, unless it's used in the context of ironic forum-trolling, but weasely trying to apologise to someone who should be the one doing the apologising, just screams of beta-male to me

 

[BrokenInside]

I am sorry to hear that. You shouldn't be embarrased, that was a sweet thing. She probably was annoyed and took it out on you. Talk about it, when she is in a better mood. Hope things get better. Goodluck

 

[perfanoff]

I'm inclined to agree with Liam (with the logic at least). If anyone should be making things up to anyone, it's her, to him. I don't usually pay much attention the whole alpha/beta thing, unless it's used in the context of ironic forum-trolling, but weasely trying to apologise to someone who should be the one doing the apologising, just screams of beta-male to me

That might be my own standard, but if I have to work and train her/fight for being treated like an "Alpha", actually treated well, I'd just kick her to the curb.

Maybe that's why I'm single, lol. I have kicked out a couple girls out before for mistreating me. I don't want to have a basic "animal"-style relationship with a SO. Don't really care for women who have problems feeling feminine and want the hurt to be put on them from time to time to feel like they have a real man. Lol.

 

[Liam]

I'm inclined to agree with Liam (with the logic at least). If anyone should be making things up to anyone, it's her, to him. I don't usually pay much attention the whole alpha/beta thing, unless it's used in the context of ironic forum-trolling, but weasely trying to apologise to someone who should be the one doing the apologising, just screams of beta-male to me

this forum is full of beta's and borderline omegas

 

[EveWasFramed]

that stupid woman got offender for NO REASON ...

You weren't there and you don't know what's going on in their lives at the moment, so calling her stupid is absurd IMO.

To the OP - there is more here than meets the eye is she got frustrated enough to throw a diaper. Trust me on this.

 

[perfanoff]

I'm inclined to agree with Liam (with the logic at least). If anyone should be making things up to anyone, it's her, to him. I don't usually pay much attention the whole alpha/beta thing, unless it's used in the context of ironic forum-trolling, but weasely trying to apologise to someone who should be the one doing the apologising, just screams of beta-male to me

this forum is full of beta's and borderline omegas

My guess is you're the one of those omegas