Ymir
Well-known member
Hello everyone!
Guess I should tell a little about myself. If there's one word to describe me, it would be "overachiever": I am 17 and have been working on a research about optimization of biodiesel production, have the top grades on my class and am currently on the final steps of writing my very first novel, a 90K words science fiction novel (as in I'll finish it next month yay).
Everyone sees a pretty and smart girl with a perfect life. Or something.
Well, I also have been dealing with depression with self-harm and chronic health problems on the side. I have to live on 1500 calories per day, can't have most, if not all, medications as they upset my already cranky digestive system and my energy levels range from "I need a 7 hours nap" to "Leave me alone to die".
This all paired up with my lack of emotional response towards most relationships makes me pretty much a loner. I resent the fact that I'm unable to keep close relationships for any longer than a couple of months without wearing out and starting hating the guts of the person I'm talking to.
Or, if by a chance I do like a person and enjoy the relationship, the other person is not very interested in me. While I'm aware I'm not unpleasant to talk to, I always think there's something missing about me or my personality that makes people I like go away. The feeling of not being enough was what triggered my self-harm habits, in the first place.
I've decided it would be therapeutical to share this side of myself (something I tend not to do at all) and meet other people who think and feel the same way.
So, nice to meet you all
Guess I should tell a little about myself. If there's one word to describe me, it would be "overachiever": I am 17 and have been working on a research about optimization of biodiesel production, have the top grades on my class and am currently on the final steps of writing my very first novel, a 90K words science fiction novel (as in I'll finish it next month yay).
Everyone sees a pretty and smart girl with a perfect life. Or something.
Well, I also have been dealing with depression with self-harm and chronic health problems on the side. I have to live on 1500 calories per day, can't have most, if not all, medications as they upset my already cranky digestive system and my energy levels range from "I need a 7 hours nap" to "Leave me alone to die".
This all paired up with my lack of emotional response towards most relationships makes me pretty much a loner. I resent the fact that I'm unable to keep close relationships for any longer than a couple of months without wearing out and starting hating the guts of the person I'm talking to.
Or, if by a chance I do like a person and enjoy the relationship, the other person is not very interested in me. While I'm aware I'm not unpleasant to talk to, I always think there's something missing about me or my personality that makes people I like go away. The feeling of not being enough was what triggered my self-harm habits, in the first place.
I've decided it would be therapeutical to share this side of myself (something I tend not to do at all) and meet other people who think and feel the same way.
So, nice to meet you all
