Pavell said:
Um. Don't know where to start but maybe people here will understand.
This past year or so I'd gone from being a moderately happy introvert to a lonely and depressed introvert. I could cope with being single. But one by one my friends have stopped bothering to so much as talk to me. The two I have left I only get to speak to about once a week. And now I'm so neurotic I'm liable to just withdraw rather than make any new friends.
I'm a mess
Hello Pavel! Welcome to ALL!
I recently join this forum community not to long ago, and I know where you are coming from.
The friends that have stopped being your friends probably weren't your friends to begin with, maybe good acquaintances but not friends.
The few you have left if they are your "REAL" friends they will stick with you no matter what, but then again friends do need space from time to time but then again you can also tell when someone is being for real with you or not as well. You know your friends you know when there being sincere or deceptive you just have to decipher which of the two is occurring on a case by case basis.
I think out of all my life, I might have had a total of four "REAL" friends, All of which I lost touch with due to either relocation or separation due to abuse of friendship.
I am huge believer of loyalty in a "real" friendship, I would say my best and only friend of nine years took advantage of my kindness, ravaged my loyalty to him, and thought no matter how inconsiderate or selfish he was I was just going to continue to be the door mat I suppose I clearly was. Nevertheless we never the same towards one another ever again. He has since been reduced to that of a confidant nothing more than an acquaintance. He reaches out to me and I to him on rare occasion when something significant has occurred and that's it. Therefore I learned over time... People are ultimately going to stay true to there-selves and they will never change who they truly are, so I realized why should I change who I am as well.
We all want friends, its in our nature as human beings to have companionship, to be accepted. The question you have to ask yourself is... At what price?
Utterly changing who you are to being more appealing to people that's not really changing for your sake? That makes a lot of sense I guess.
I say all of this to encourage you to be of good cheer. Know thy self, and don't allow your emotions to be governed by the words of others.
We are to live a life of experience, which will undoubtedly vary from person to person. Not one person's life will EVER be the same no matter how much we may desperately want to be so.
Be happy with your life as it is for what it is, If you a happen to make a genuine friend or two... value there input and company and preserve them always. Also know if you don't make a friend today or tomorrow that's okay too! There is someone out there that is bound to resonate with your core ideas and ways of being. Be not of despair continue to be happy and find your joy wheresoever you can.
There many encouraging people on the forums here at "ALL" that will happily talk to you I am sure, and I will continue to make myself available to you should you wish it.
My final words to you are simply....
"Stay True to yourself, you are who you are! Now go far!
Peace!
