How do you cope with your loneliness

[xninjaguyx]

When you feel especially lonely, what do you do?

At my loneliest I try to be alone. My meaning being that I notice how lonely it is when I'm sitting with other people, usually people I'd rather not be around. Of course I feel lonely by myself, but I can deal with it if I have something to do.

I like to play video games or watch a comedy. I also like watching a tv series I'm into or sometimes I'll continue a book I'm reading.
I can't watch love stories or anything too sad. I just can't stand them unless I'm watching them with someone else.

How do you cope?

 

[ladyforsaken]

Just keep myself distracted.. that's how I cope. Maybe recent years I've just basically embraced loneliness and I actually prefer being alone. So it doesn't serve as much of a problem to me now.

 

[xninjaguyx]

Just keep myself distracted.. that's how I cope. Maybe recent years I've just basically embraced loneliness and I actually prefer being alone. So it doesn't serve as much of a problem to me now.

Doesn't it bother you sometimes? I mean you still spend a lot of time on A Lonely Life, don't you. Or do you just come back for the friends?

 

[ladyforsaken]

I spend a lot of time on here for distraction really. And coping. Sometimes it's so much harder to face those things that bother me. Being on the forum kinda helps me distract and cope and deal... because I can let it out here and people here care.

Also, I've always had a goal in life to help others in need.. because there were strangers who helped me when I was really low at a point in my life before this. So I want to give back what I received. Being on here allows me to do that.. help others. Sometimes I feel like I thrive on helping others.. otherwise I kinda just feel dull.

It doesn't bother me anymore, being alone or lonely. I choose to be alone now more often than not. Previously, I would only get depressed and I pass time by watching a lot of shows and movies and videos on YouTube. I no longer do that though.

 

[Nice But Dim Jim]

I cope badly and often turn to darker friends,alcohol and drugs.

Yesterday I felt positively comfortable with myself and after months and months of being unhappy in my somewhat lonelylife, I remembered that the things I was doing now that made me unhappy were actually the things that used to make me happy but for so long I was told that they shouldn't make me happy that I ended up thinking that. With this in mind, I had a great day watching movies without feeling guilty for cutting myself off from civilisation for another day. Yesterday was the first day since August 2012 that I genuinely did not feel lonely.

 

[xninjaguyx]

Yesterday was the first day since August 2012 that I genuinely did not feel lonely.

I hope you more frequently have days like that. May I ask why yesterday was different from the others?

I spend a lot of time on here for distraction really. And coping. Sometimes it's so much harder to face those things that bother me. Being on the forum kinda helps me distract and cope and deal... because I can let it out here and people here care.

Also, I've always had a goal in life to help others in need.. because there were strangers who d me when I was really low at a point in my life before this. So I want to give back what I received. Being on here allows me to do that.. help others. Sometimes I feel like I thrive on helping others.. otherwise I kinda just feel dull.

It doesn't bother me anymore, being alone or lonely. I choose to be alone now more often than not. Previously, I would only get depressed and I pass time by watching a lot of shows and movies and videos on YouTube. I no longer do that though.

Thats a great trait. Never lose it, even if you have a time when you feel betrayed. That's when you'll need it most.

 

[Nice But Dim Jim]

Yesterday was the first day since August 2012 that I genuinely did not feel lonely.

I hope you more frequently have days like that. May I ask why yesterday was different from the others?

I think it was just the first time I remembered who I am rather than who I was and who I thought I needed to be. I spent 70% of my adult life up until now in one relationship and i think for a very long time my body and mind just couldn't deal with it's ending, I've been so negative and bitter about myself recently thinking I wasn't good enough and how wrong the choices I made were but now it just doesn't matter, I'm just going to enjoy being me to the best of my ability.

 

[xninjaguyx]

Yesterday was the first day since August 2012 that I genuinely did not feel lonely.

I hope you more frequently have days like that. May I ask why yesterday was different from the others?

I think it was just the first time I remembered who I am rather than who I was and who I thought I needed to be. I spent 70% of my adult life up until now in one relationship and i think for a very long time my body and mind just couldn't deal with it's ending, I've been so negative and bitter about myself recently thinking I wasn't good enough and how wrong the choices I made were but now it just doesn't matter, I'm just going to enjoy being me to the best of my ability.

Good luck to you bro!

 

[Stillwaters]

For most of my life I coped with loneliness by pursuing hobbies and spending a lot of time outdoors. I've always had a great love of nature and felt more at peace with the world when I was surrounded by trees rather than people. A couple of years ago though, things changed and I lost interest in everything, I'm not quite sure why.... For about eighteen months I just spent my days drinking and sleeping for the most part, I've eased up on the booze now and started to return to my hobbies again, but they're just simple distraction now rather than enjoyment.

 

[murmi97]

I know what you mean about wanting to be lonely alone. The semester I was at college and couldn't seem to make any friends I ended up not eating much because eating meant going out in public to sit alone surrounded by people.

 

[Peaches]

sit down and make plans on how to get less lonely, at its worst I look for someone to talk with on facebook or even call my mother, even if only dysfunctional stuff arises from that

 

[asdfghjkl]

Spiritual work. I do a lot of talking to God and asking for help to get me through the day. Most of the time it works.

Also, not focus on my short comings. I'm not in college and have no job, and I stay home a lot. It has been this way for almost 4 years. Focusing on that is a sure enough way to make me not feel close to good in any way.

Talking myself up. I try to remember that everyday that passes is one less day to feel lonely. I remember there are good things about myself that one day someone will see in me. I've got talents. The present time isn't the end all be of my existence.

My physical body. Sometimes I feel achy or like I have really low energy. I try to take vitamins and eat right, if I can. I try to move around--listening to music helps with that. Deep breathing. Giving a **** about the way I look and not just sitting in night clothes everyday.

Staying away from things that trigger loneliness. When I'm lonely, I long for a deep connection. There are a few people I talk to online, but we there's something in the way with all of them. Two don't get online like they use to, and the one person I can talk to easily, in terms of availability, just doesn't understand this, not that its his fault but it doesn't help me at the time, so I avoid people. I also avoid the facebook news feed, seeing that it's graduation season. and so on.

Getting it out in the open while I'm alone. I pray, talk to myself, I write, vent online. Do what I gotta do to experience and feel it, hopefully it moves on.

Get/watch/do something I like. I like making cards and tags, maybe I'll eat some chocolate or cake if I got anything. Find an excuse to get out and drive (not that I need one, my parents know it's boring here day after day but I still feel like I'm leeching off gas since they have jobs and I don't) or go to grandmas. Watch something funny, etc.

AND sometimes, none of that works. I just whine and sigh and this depression gets overwhelming. Like I'm better off dead. But no matter how far I drop I try to remember that I always come back.

 

[Dissident]

I engage my mind entirely in intellectual pursuits, life planning, or video games. Basically anything to keep my mind from getting bored and wandering into lonely territory.

 

[xaero]

Games and more games

 

[hye345]

Games and more games

One thing I used to do in the past was go on walks at night. At the time, I lived at the very edge of town, so for a mile or so there was only one highway that led into town, and there weren't a lot of street lights in this section of the highway, nor was there much traffic, so it was very dark and peaceful. Something about walking down a quiet road under the stars really puts things in perspective, makes you forget about your problems.

 

[Bones]

Distract myself with complex thoughts or write fantasy novels in my head.

 

[SunWeb]

When i feel completely broken i can't do anything. Lately i am being drawn in my emptiness. Feeling ompletely alone, don't want to go on public, have some unexpected problems at home that striked like thunder, can get decent job(though i am still trying). All this honeysuckle came together somehow and don't release me for about 3 months already.
I've tried to go in the park and will try to go to the sea soon. Park is awful place when i felt even more lonely surrounding by happy people. My loneliness is surely not a problem comparing to another honeysuckle going on in my life but i can't focus on a bigger problems because of it.

P.S. Can't believe i am on the site again. Thats a bad sign but thats surey the place where i can talk more freely.

 

[xninjaguyx]

I used to go to a nearby park with a lake, or I'd go to the gym when I don't feel like playing any games. None of that stuff seems to help anymore tho... My heart just feels too heavy. I'm trying to find a new hobby but have no clue what to do. All I really want to do now is just drink the day away at a local bar.

 

[TheHydromancer]

Sometimes I cope with being lonely. In times like that I sort of drift around the house, lost in my own thoughts and comtemplations.
On occasion, I don't cope. Mostly because I don't want to have to cope with my loneliness. I want to live. That's about then I either become hyperactive or I have an emotional breakdown.
Recently, I have begun to deal with this problem by taking up studying psychology as a hobby. It's the one thing I love more than science and reading books.

 

[perfanoff]

I used to go to a nearby park with a lake, or I'd go to the gym when I don't feel like playing any games. None of that stuff seems to help anymore tho... My heart just feels too heavy. I'm trying to find a new hobby but have no clue what to do. All I really want to do now is just drink the day away at a local bar.

One of the best ways to forget your problems and it might get you fit, too.

I recommend it. Or even push-ups or something.