African_weasel
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Discuss how to try to make friend and try to spend time with them? discuss!!!:club:
Darrell_Licht said:Simply become interested in other people. Some people won't respond the way you like, but I guarantee you ONE person will. It only takes is one person at a time. Next thing you know, you're part of a network.
With people like us (introverted, anxious, eccentric etc.) it helps to learn not to wear your feelings on a sleeve and be extra patient with others. try not to think all about yourself.
Keep in mind these things take time. Especially with the older you get.
imlikeasilhouette said:Darrell_Licht said:Simply become interested in other people. Some people won't respond the way you like, but I guarantee you ONE person will. It only takes is one person at a time. Next thing you know, you're part of a network.
With people like us (introverted, anxious, eccentric etc.) it helps to learn not to wear your feelings on a sleeve and be extra patient with others. try not to think all about yourself.
Keep in mind these things take time. Especially with the older you get.
I agree with this. Normally, I just try expressing and showing my interest in other people and see how they'd respond first.
Peaches said:just before seeing this thread I read this: http://www.elephantjournal.com/2014...riends-in-real-life-no-social-media-required/
ashita said:I am still in school, so I've been trying to join clubs and organizations. It hasn't worked out nicely for me, though. I feel very left out at gatherings and it's very scary for me to go up to people and talk to them. But I can see how shared interest can bring people together.
Cucuboth said:I understand this. Joining clubs, interest groups, trying to do volunteering, none of it has worked for me. Even when it's been promised that it will, it doesn't. I just always seem to be the 'odd one out'. Even when the other people are supposed to be like me, have the same interests, I seem to be the one that doesn't fit in, and doesn't get accepted. By anyone. If I try to be nice to someone, greet them, talk to them, ask them about themselves (as so many therapists used to tell me to do) I just get told to get lost .... although, not in as nice a way as that. Even happens 9/10 times on the internet, a place where you would think it would be actually easier to find someone to at least talk to regularly.
You can't be friends with people who don't want to be friends with you. It's sadly as simple as that.
SofiasMami said:Hi,
First off, your most satisfying and deep friendships will be found offline, not on the web. So the first step is to turn off your computer or phone.
VanillaCreme said:SofiasMami said:Hi,
First off, your most satisfying and deep friendships will be found offline, not on the web. So the first step is to turn off your computer or phone.
I don't think this is necessarily true for everyone. A friend is a friend, regardless of if you know their screen name better than their first name, or if you grew up together from birth.
Tiina63 said:VanillaCreme said:SofiasMami said:Hi,
First off, your most satisfying and deep friendships will be found offline, not on the web. So the first step is to turn off your computer or phone.
I don't think this is necessarily true for everyone. A friend is a friend, regardless of if you know their screen name better than their first name, or if you grew up together from birth.
I agree with Vanilla Creme on this one, ever since I made a great cyberfriend in another country. I know that I can tell her anything and that she will be supportive and interested and she knows the same applies the other way round.
SofiasMami said:Hi,
First off, your most satisfying and deep friendships will be found offline, not on the web. So the first step is to turn off your computer or phone.
When I was in college, I read a book called How to Win Friends and Influence People. I believe the author's last name is Carnegie if I remember correctly. I'm sure it's still in print. I still remember some of the points in the book, like people love to talk about themselves (that includes me and you and 99% of people you will meet!). So when you meet someone, if you get them talking about themselves and show a genuine interest in them, they will tend to view you positively.
Friendships must be cultivated. You can't just sign up for one. You must make an effort, be patient and if someone isn't interested in being your friend don't take it personally.
-Teresa
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