how do you progress from general chatting ?

[ladyforsaken]

^Indeed.

 

[Triple Bogey]

Hmm... The gap is so big because there's a connector missing. Try adding flirting in between the general chit chat and asking out. It helps to see if there's any interest and chemistry. The truth is it only takes a person a few minutes to know if they're initially interested in someone. It's the whole basis of speed dating. I'm not saying you have to go crazy with the sexually charged double entendres and over the top pickup lines, but playful flirting is a good place to start.

that's the problem, I never see interest from anybody !
I know I am wasting my time.

---

"Would you like to meet for coffee after work Thursday?"
"Would you like to go see the new Hobbit film?" (Make sure you go to coffee afterwards so you can actually talk
"Would you like to meet for lunch at --- on Saturday?"
"Would you like to go to the zoo on Sunday?"
"I'm going to --- on Saturday to take some photos, would you like to join for some fresh air?"
"There's a new photography exhibit at --- gallery, would you like to join me Saturday afternoon to have a look?"

The more you ask, the more confident you'll get
Try one and let us know how it goes!

-Teresa

thanks and nice suggestions. They would probably work for someone else.

---

Don't quit before you start.

-Teresa

---

I will let you know if anything happens

---

Please do
I'm pretty sure a lot of us are rooting for you

-Teresa

---

Yes I know and everybody is very sweet on here and I appreciate it !

But I don't have any confidence at the moment, it is gone. That woman came in today and I found myself feeling nervous and a huge wave of hopelessness came over me. It was busy as well and I didn't get to serve her, somebody else did. It's not very practical as well, it is very busy and you don't get a minute to yourself. I can't see it anything happening.

I know I should forget about women customers and I should go somewhere to meet other women, a group or a club. I can't force myself though. My confidence is shot to bits at the moment !

 

[SofiasMami]

Sorry you didn't get a chance to talk to your customer. Try not to be too hard on yourself
Perhaps she'll come in again during a slow day and you'll be feeling confident that day

On a side note, I used to work in jobs with the public and sometimes I wish I still did! These days I sit at a desk at a computer all day in an office with 95% women with a snowball's chance in hell of meeting a man there

-Teresa

 

[Triple Bogey]

Sorry you didn't get a chance to talk to your customer. Try not to be too hard on yourself
Perhaps she'll come in again during a slow day and you'll be feeling confident that day

On a side note, I used to work in jobs with the public and sometimes I wish I still did! These days I sit at a desk at a computer all day in an office with 95% women with a snowball's chance in hell of meeting a man there

-Teresa

it's the best part of my job talking to the customers. They all call me 'Dave' and chat about football and golf. Some come to my till on purpose for a chat. Some are very lonely. I understand all about that, going into a shop and talking to the cashier will probably be the only conversation they have all day. It annoys me the manager and area manager says we are rude to the customers. The staff can't be any more friendly and the customers love us !

That lady only comes in on Saturday and it's always busy. I was going to ask her what her job was today.

 

[Realist]

Im the other way around. Just flitt with them and make them know you are interested.