How does one write messages on dating sites?

[nerdygirl]

Aww, I was quoted.

I find the question, "Are you having luck on this site so far?" kind of awkward. I've received it, and I'm always kind of uncertain of how to respond. If I say, "no" then it sounds like I'm too particular. If I say, "yes" then it sounds like I have a guy- and I'm trying to cheat on him.

I think the key is in remembering that you're talking to somebody who has thoughts and feelings. Whether you're talking to a guy or girl, you should be friendly and respectful, and provide suitable prompts. You know, prompts that aren't about boobs.

 

[NeinEnergie]

My luck with online dating is mixed. I've met some really cool people that way, but some real sketchy people too. And right now I seem to be completely ignored by everyone. I've tried all manner of different opening messages. Just be the person and say the things that are most comfortable to you. The right potential partner with respond positively.

I think a large part of it is what site you're on too. On sites like OKC I actually get more responses from messages like "Wanna take a roadie to Vegas and elope?" than I do any serious messages.

The free sites have no way of keeping out those who aren't really interested in looking for someone for the right reasons, either. I always recommend that people use pay-sites simply for the fact you know the other people are also serious about finding someone.

So maybe it's not the content of your messages, but instead the content of the people you're writing that's the issue.

I personally have issues putting up pictures, as I don't feel as though I'm attractive at all, regardless of what elderly women tell me!

 

[Jocsaint]

I never had any luck with online dating. I met one girl, but our relationship never really developed. All last year I tried messaging ladies on this one site, but never got a response from any of them. I gave up and closed my account...

 

[LonelyInAtl]

I think if you aren't what society deems to be a "hot" guy on an OLD site, you will have no luck whatsoever.

"So many men, so little time" seems to apply here.

 

[el Jay]

I think a large part of it is what site you're on too. On sites like OKC I actually get more responses from messages like "Wanna take a roadie to Vegas and elope?" than I do any serious messages.

One of the best responses I got (and one of the only ones) was a girl I just messaged to mention something about her username. Not a serious message, just a little aside. She adored that observation (but apparently not me enough to actually reply more than twice).

I still make it a point to message any girl I see that has a username that stands out or makes me stop for some reason. I never really expect a reply (and never get one, so I guess we're even), I just do it in the hopes that I might make that girl smile for a moment when and if she reads the message. Oddly enough, it's worth it just for that possibility.

 

[Mike413]

Go out and be social in public. Don't rely on the internet. At some point after you have lots of friends that are women or only a few(even just random girls you don't really know) get them to be in some photos with you. Then if you still want to post an online profile put some of those pics of you and the girls online and bam problem solved. Women want to be with men who are with other women. That's really not even an opinion. It's how women think and the women on here can deny that all they want but they know I'm right. Even if you come across as looking like a player that's still better than having all your pictures be with just you in them. At the very least have some of your pics be of men and women not just you and your buds.

 

[PandaBoy]

the dating site that i frequent, it is easy to talk to women as they are pretty open about everything. I usually start with a "hello, i like your profile". something simple s always better if you dont know what to say.

 

[WildernessWildChild]

Lie.

 

[perfanoff]

He probably works at a dating site so it's a reasonable assumption he frequents it. The second part is not as credible.

 

[EveWasFramed]

Lie.

Is that how you write messages on dating sites, H?