How was your 2011?

[thalassa]

My main goal at the start of the year was to work on my social anxiety, particularly the kind that makes me panic around teenagers/young people. This was important to me as I couldn't face higher education anymore as I completely broke down around the others. So I agreed to join a group originally intended to motivate young people to get a job. I hoped that this might be a positive experience for me and that I might be able to feel at ease around young people. This was not the case... The people in this group clearly needed to be there - they could not get or hold down a job as they had serious attitude and agression issues. They were the last kind of young people that I should have surrounded myself with in order to 'heal'. I was tense every time I was there, never spoke a word in the group and dreaded going there every single time. On top of that, there were some very nasty individuals that made it very hard for me whilst being there. The two girls that were there never bothered speaking to me, but they thought they knew all about me and told everyone how much they couldn't stand me. I also overheard them saying that they couldn't understand what a completely asocial person was doing in a group, that I didn't belong there. We had to do some sports activities and towards the end I avoided the girl's changing room - I couldn't stand it anymore. The boys weren't any better. They found it funny to pretend they liked me and to ask me out for a drink only to stand me up or completely ignore me. I only agreed because I was too scared to say no - I was completely tormented the days beforehand because I didn't want to go and it wouldn't have felt right. One of those boys later called me a plant while I was sitting next to him. Who knows what they said when I wasn't around. I wanted to leave the group several times, some times I could not show up, but in the end I stuck it out for 7 months.

I still have social anxiety, and I have an even bigger fear of teenagers now. However I will try to go back to college this February - I am going to join a programme in which I will be one of the youngest students. No more 18-year-olds. I hope to goodness that it will work this time.

I have found a better therapist aswell.

I haven't found any friends.

 

[zero]

one of the most difficult, ugliest and worst years I`ve ever had; the second in a row. Hope the next one will be finally a good one.

 

[Wind Fish]

2011 was my first whole year after graduating and its been very depressing. I've had some time to reflect though so hopefuly things will improve next year though I've long way to go. Other positves are that I've finaly gotten round to trying my hand at writing down a few poems and fantasies rather than just think about them, I've just started back at the gym after four years and Have also gotten an amazing new laptop. I am gradualy meeting more people as well but so far there's been no one that it's been possible to make friends with.

The news has been interesting if not always positive; I was particularly exited by all the revollutions that took place.

 

[cumulus.james]

Boring, depressing and lonely just like 2010 , 2009, 2008 etc.

So what are YOU going to do to try and change that this year?

 

[kinzeUK]

First half, quite good from feb-july. Then from aug onwards.....*sigh

I might be depressed and what not now but I try to take some small consolation that this year wasn't AS bad as last year. Cos that was ******* awful.

 

[Mouse]

Of course 2012 will have global catastrophe, hunger, poverty, misery and war. But I can't do anything about what may or may not will happen except enjoy being at home because home where the heart is, for I belong to a strong family who are as optimistic as I am.

I shall take each moment, happy or sad and pack them into my bag of life; taking time out later to reflect on my scars of 2011 to prove it's worth hitting rock bottom - because the next time around, the route back up will get more and more familiar.

Tonight, that is my take on the year that soon shall be passed. And my gin & tonic never tasted better.

 

[kinzeUK]

Btw@thalassa I'm really sorry you had such a negative experience there. I just completed a 6 week SAGE computerised book keeping course paid for through our government so i.e. if your signing on and claiming JSA you can enrol. Was really worth doing all in all even though my latest bout of depression struck just before I had my induction which didn't help matters. But the group I was in were nice, mostly my age and older (i'm 37). Always good to meet other people who all have their own life story, one of them also suffering from depression and anxiety. Sure enough there were a few mouthy sorts but luckily in the other group that were doing Customer Service training (I sure hope they sort themselves out because God forbid having one of them doing that role)

Anyways, I'm sure I'm not wrong in thinking you have friends on here. I have to say in just a few days of joining here, I'm really quite impressed with the sort of people who frequent this site and offer advice or tell their stories. Seems to be a lot of genuine-sounding folk which isn't always the case for forums as I should well know....

Have a virtual hug from me thalassa *hug

 

[Lonely in BC]

Thank God it's almost over- another 10 days to go.

The wheels are already in motion to make 2012 a better year.

 

[Arsenic Queen]

Love : One semi-meaningful relationship that bit the dust on Valentine's day; a lot of wasted time; a useless, painful set back with an ex; more losses than gains.
Arts : First exhibition; was great but didn't sell as much as I thought; materially, rather losses than gains, but it's good to start being seen.
Family : A closer relationship with my youngest daughter; continued difficult relationship with my eldest, the conflict continued the whole year; one of my grandmothers died; my mother started mild alzheimer.
Money : Been OK, but I don't really care; still got school debts; gym costed too much for my means; glad that I won't have to move out this year; alot of material items broke down at my apt, I'll need to replace alot of objects in 2012.
Health : Gym was starting to get me seriously fit and that was great; "Love" failures above sent my motivation bite the dust a little later, and I'm not getting gym again until I have a permanent well-paying job, too $$$; otherwise depression starts fading off, that's good.

Been overall better than the last 2-3 years, but there's still been more losses than gains. :/

 

[sentiententity]

Glad to hear of all the improvements that people have made. Let it give hope to those of us who have had a less than stellar 2010.

As for me, Well it was difficult but not as difficult as 2009. My divorce was well over with and I didn't have to deal with that. Had a lot of rejection when it comes to dating but that's life. Overall it was probably the most lonely year of my life, but I have a dog now so that helps.

I think I'm going to volunteer at a nursing home so maybe 2012 will yeild some more social opporutnities, perhaps with some cute nurses...

 

[passage]

Some good, some bad. But I learned things and grew. Some things were not worth it for the money spent, but its all in the past. Looking forward to 2012, but I have some big challenges, finishing school and finding work.

 

[tangerinedream]

I will be pleased as fresia to see the door slam on the ass end of this year. 2011 tied me in knots.

It's going to take me a full year just to recover, I think.

I was thinking earlier that I am back to where I was a year ago, but that's not quite true: I would actually have to climb UP to get back to Square One. I had some mighty high highs this year, and some pretty bad lows. The fall (not the season, but the plummet) that came in October was bad, and followed by another bleak November.

 

[Legato]

A mix of up and down to be honest.

I'm going to make sure 2012 beats it though.