Broken heart
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- Joined
- Apr 17, 2019
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I am a 51 yr old professional woman. I work part time only to be a more-or-less stay home mom. I have 2 teens. I also have a small catering business and a fashion blog.
However, every time I cook something, my husband throws the food in my face and tells me "what is this honeysuckle you cooked". Every single time. He also never forgets to mention how I am completely useless and do nothing whatsoever at home since I have help at home.
I have about 20 years of education, master's degree, and am a very competent person where I work.
Yet his words kill me.
He is very successful. Everybody loves him. And I do too.
But his constant humiliation to me destroys me from the inside and leaves me with very low self esteem. He never ever tells me: you look really nice today (if I do) or thank you or please.
I feel so lonely that it tears me apart.
He never forgets to remind me that it is his money and his house and his everything.
I try to keep fit, dress very very well and look good at all times. The house is always clean, his clothes ironed, yet in his eyes I am useless and evetybody else is better. So much so that I wish I could die just so he would know what he missed.
Why do men act like they are God? Why does it hurt them so much to be just "nice"? Why? Would this hurt their ego so much?
I cannot leave him for complicated circumstances..but I wish that just once he can feel I am valuable. That I am important. That I am not like those no-brain women spending all their days in shopping malls and doing nothing.
Except he only sees me as one.
Maybe I am venting but I am just so tired of it all.
However, every time I cook something, my husband throws the food in my face and tells me "what is this honeysuckle you cooked". Every single time. He also never forgets to mention how I am completely useless and do nothing whatsoever at home since I have help at home.
I have about 20 years of education, master's degree, and am a very competent person where I work.
Yet his words kill me.
He is very successful. Everybody loves him. And I do too.
But his constant humiliation to me destroys me from the inside and leaves me with very low self esteem. He never ever tells me: you look really nice today (if I do) or thank you or please.
I feel so lonely that it tears me apart.
He never forgets to remind me that it is his money and his house and his everything.
I try to keep fit, dress very very well and look good at all times. The house is always clean, his clothes ironed, yet in his eyes I am useless and evetybody else is better. So much so that I wish I could die just so he would know what he missed.
Why do men act like they are God? Why does it hurt them so much to be just "nice"? Why? Would this hurt their ego so much?
I cannot leave him for complicated circumstances..but I wish that just once he can feel I am valuable. That I am important. That I am not like those no-brain women spending all their days in shopping malls and doing nothing.
Except he only sees me as one.
Maybe I am venting but I am just so tired of it all.