I am ancient
- Thread starter Chris 2
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Help Support Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum:
Chris 2 said:I have been a member on here since early 07 and nothing has change in the last 7 years.
You mean in your life, right? Sometimes sitting and waiting for things to change doesn't do nothing, you have to make a change.
Sometimes you can put your heart and soul into trying to change your life and still end up back at square one. This doesn't mean you shouldn't try, but sometimes it is exhausting to keep trying and not to get anywhere.
Lady Gaga Snerd
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So in 6 yrs what have you done to try to change the situation you are unhappy with?
I understand that to a point. The last 3 years my life has not moved at all. At the same time, for the first two years I didn't even try to make it change. I just sat around hoping it would. This year I said things would change. I put a little bit of effort into it for the first 3 months, then sat around another 5. Then stuff happened making me realize how sad my life is. So I decided wow, if I lose another year and nothing changes it's going to destroy me on the inside.
There's still 3 months left in a year. Huge change can happen in small amounts of time if you put the effort in. Put the effort in.
There's still 3 months left in a year. Huge change can happen in small amounts of time if you put the effort in. Put the effort in.
Baka
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Chris 2 said:I have been a member on here since early 07 and nothing has change in the last 7 years.
Yeah, life sucks that way.
It's easy for other people to judge and assume that you haven't done anything to change your life, but sometimes your best efforts just don't make a difference. It's gloomy and hard to accept since we all want to hope, but it's true.
For every person who succeeds at life, there are probably thousands who fail at it. I guess we can only keep at it. Keep trying to obtain the things we think will make us happy or reevaluate those things and lower our expectations.
Lately, I've been trying to appreciate the things that do make me happy. I'm lucky in that I have a great family. I have no friends and no lover, but at least I have them. They make me happy. I also feel life's worth living as long as I can listen to great music, watch great movies or TV, and enjoy great food. It sounds very basic, but beggars can't be choosers.
It's not that people are assuming you didn't try to change anything. But if you have a belief that your best effort won't make a difference then you've given up all hope. That in itself is a self-fulfilling prophecy of failure.
Life isn't easy. It's hard... and not equally hard. Some people really do have it rough. But I think we all have to strive to improve ourselves.
The biggest things haunting me, are failures, and regrets. So for the last 3 years I've sat around doing almost nothing. Sure not trying helps me avoid the failures, but the regret of not even trying and wasting all that time is unbearable.
It's true we have to learn to love what we have instead of hating what we don't have. But that doesn't mean we should ever settle either. Everybody needs to come to peace with their own terms of course. But if a person is on this forum they obviously aren't truly at peace, and I think everyone should keep trying to do better, because I think everyone can.
Life isn't easy. It's hard... and not equally hard. Some people really do have it rough. But I think we all have to strive to improve ourselves.
The biggest things haunting me, are failures, and regrets. So for the last 3 years I've sat around doing almost nothing. Sure not trying helps me avoid the failures, but the regret of not even trying and wasting all that time is unbearable.
It's true we have to learn to love what we have instead of hating what we don't have. But that doesn't mean we should ever settle either. Everybody needs to come to peace with their own terms of course. But if a person is on this forum they obviously aren't truly at peace, and I think everyone should keep trying to do better, because I think everyone can.
Is there something that you could change, that you have been doing (or not doing) in the years you have been here...? Have you been saying "no" to opportunities, or feel like your comfort zone will never be breached? I know I've done that. No to hanging out, no to going out, no to lots of things... Found it shut people off, which is why I got nowhere fast.
jzinsky
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Chris 2 said:
What's the mess? Let's sort it out together
MTrip
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lostatsea said:
You got that right. *nodding* Listen to the wise counsel here, Chris 2. If you've been struggling to change things for the better, & no good results have come, then take & step back & askwhy haven't my efforts succeeded? All the effort in the world won't help if it is expended in the wrong direction, or if you don't find useful help in your quest.
