scottishgirl said:
i am 22 i live in scotland.my life so far has been hell ive went through so many things that words cant describe.I dont talk to any of my family set from my dad.my sister is a junkie my other sister did the worst thing possible to me that sent me over the edge.my own mother used to tell me when i was younger that i was the biggest mistake of her life!!!i went through the worst possible thing that can happen to a girl.i have loads of scars of selfharm and i knw when people look at me the dont see me they see the scars.and for a while i pretended that i was this happy full of adventure girl but i couldnt keep it i cant talk to my friends because they dont really get it and tell me 2 suck it up and knw i should do that.ive been seeing my thepist for about 8 months and it helps.but when i go home im all by myself no-one to talk to but the worst thing is i see everybody moving on getting engaged having kids then i look at me all i see is emptyness and its so sad it seems i cant get anything right not yet anyways.the question i really want to ask is this all jus me or is there other people out there that feels the same n that im not the only 1!!!!
i feel the same as yours. but if you know more about my loneliness maybe it can console your troubled heart more or less.not like you, i have no friends to talk to,and the only listener in my real life is my echo, no one asks, no one cares, no one senses the pain of my thoughts. and the only companion that'd not leave me alone is my shadow, but even this would be destroyed by the darkness of night. no light, no moon, no star, no sound, and the only visitor is but a mother fly who carries her babies here and there in my empty room, though disgusting, yet, she's the only living who can give me some noise, though very monotonous and dull, yet it's the only living music that i can hear. but even this would not last long for when i open the window in the morning she would fly away too, to a place to enjoy her happiness of begetting her thousands of generations. so i was alone again, say a hello to my new formed shadow in the morning sunshine and start a new day of the same loneliness. as if it's a maze without any exit. i cannot escape, but to accept the fact of being alone, completely and desperately. robinson crusoe，the famous lonest, even he had a cat and a dog and a parrot to talk to, while i have none but my shadow and the sound of my breath at night. maybe some day i'd put some rotten things in my room, so that some damned insects would give me a visit, and sing a disturbing solo or chorus to my terrible silence, and give my life a new impetus to live on.
so cheer up when you feel low, think of my case and be released from your feeling of loneliness. for someone somewhere is feeling more tensely the same feeling you're feeling now.
blessed are those who are feeling alone, for they'll be fed up with it, and want to live in a new way.
