Poe's Prodigy
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- Joined
- Feb 7, 2010
- Messages
- 14
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OK, so here's me writing this, quite pissed off, while my sister, who cries over nothing is being comforted by my mother downstairs. I have seen my mom for a total of 5 MINUTES this entire week! Week being since Saturday, and it is now Thursday evening.
Do you want to know what my sister is crying about? No, you probably don't care, but I'm so mad right now that I'll completely disgregard any sense of ettiquette and tell you anyways!
While I was attempting to tell my mother about all the wonderful things that have happened to me this week, my spoiled, bratty, selfish litte sister (12 years old) decides to cut in, after having already prevented me from even seeing my mother for the hour and a half she has been at home from work by throwing a fake hissy fit, decides to cut in and start crying about how our diabetic cat, who cannot control her bladder, has peed on her Juicy Couture or Ambercrombie clothes once again.
Side note: we are majorly in debt, and can barely afford our bills, much less her clothes. I took a look at the spreadsheet my dad makes every month for our household costs. My parents let my sister spend more money on clothes than we spent on groceries. By thet way, I have been walking around with giant (non-intentional, just signs of wear) holes in my pants for three months, and I have been begging to get just one pair of jeans. I was flat-out refused and told "we don't have money for your every need". Really? And they have enough money for my sister to wear Victoria's Secret underwear? I'm not saying that I want fancy brands- I'm happy with my Target clothes. I only wish that they weren't so old that people from my middle school recognize them.
Anyways, I say, in a very nice and sincere tone, that if she closed the door of her room she wouldn't have this problem. That sparks a huge emotional meltdown with her screaming at the top of her lungs that I am a horrible person, that all of her life's many problems, like broken fingernails or whatever, are my fault, and that I should just die because nobody even likes me because I"m so fat and ugly. Yes, those are the exact words she used.
Does anybody want to know which crying daughter was conforted in the next two minutes?
Million-dollar answer: not me.
How is anyone surprised that I have problems when I live in this kind of unfair, hateful, and hostile enviroment? How can I live like this?
I tried to love my sister, but the fact is that I don't like her as a person. If she was someone I knew at my school, I would hate her. As it is, I'm not allowed to hate her because she's my sister.
Do you know who's always there for my highly emotional mother whenever she has one of her breakdowns or "I hate my life, I'm a failure" phases, or the nervous fits of hysteria? I always have been, and most likely will continue to be, the one who abandons her homework and stays up until one in the morning trying to comfort my mother while my sister yells at her and orders her to "stop being so stupid and weird and start being normal!". That is an actual quote. That is the daughter my mother runs to comfort.
Everything I do is to try and make my parents happy. I don't like any of the extra classes they "ask" (force) me to take, or the sports they make me play, or pretty much everything they make me do. They, however, have no idea, because I have tried to win their approval and love so desperately that I have smiled and taken it all with the hope that they will finally show that they care about me too.
This is the first time I have ever written/told someone about any of this, and it's just makikng it feel worse. It's not a relief at all, but I'm so sad, and angry, and bitter and desperate that I'm just trying to catch myself on something before I completely drown in my emotion.
Do you want to know what my sister is crying about? No, you probably don't care, but I'm so mad right now that I'll completely disgregard any sense of ettiquette and tell you anyways!
While I was attempting to tell my mother about all the wonderful things that have happened to me this week, my spoiled, bratty, selfish litte sister (12 years old) decides to cut in, after having already prevented me from even seeing my mother for the hour and a half she has been at home from work by throwing a fake hissy fit, decides to cut in and start crying about how our diabetic cat, who cannot control her bladder, has peed on her Juicy Couture or Ambercrombie clothes once again.
Side note: we are majorly in debt, and can barely afford our bills, much less her clothes. I took a look at the spreadsheet my dad makes every month for our household costs. My parents let my sister spend more money on clothes than we spent on groceries. By thet way, I have been walking around with giant (non-intentional, just signs of wear) holes in my pants for three months, and I have been begging to get just one pair of jeans. I was flat-out refused and told "we don't have money for your every need". Really? And they have enough money for my sister to wear Victoria's Secret underwear? I'm not saying that I want fancy brands- I'm happy with my Target clothes. I only wish that they weren't so old that people from my middle school recognize them.
Anyways, I say, in a very nice and sincere tone, that if she closed the door of her room she wouldn't have this problem. That sparks a huge emotional meltdown with her screaming at the top of her lungs that I am a horrible person, that all of her life's many problems, like broken fingernails or whatever, are my fault, and that I should just die because nobody even likes me because I"m so fat and ugly. Yes, those are the exact words she used.
Does anybody want to know which crying daughter was conforted in the next two minutes?
Million-dollar answer: not me.
How is anyone surprised that I have problems when I live in this kind of unfair, hateful, and hostile enviroment? How can I live like this?
I tried to love my sister, but the fact is that I don't like her as a person. If she was someone I knew at my school, I would hate her. As it is, I'm not allowed to hate her because she's my sister.
Do you know who's always there for my highly emotional mother whenever she has one of her breakdowns or "I hate my life, I'm a failure" phases, or the nervous fits of hysteria? I always have been, and most likely will continue to be, the one who abandons her homework and stays up until one in the morning trying to comfort my mother while my sister yells at her and orders her to "stop being so stupid and weird and start being normal!". That is an actual quote. That is the daughter my mother runs to comfort.
Everything I do is to try and make my parents happy. I don't like any of the extra classes they "ask" (force) me to take, or the sports they make me play, or pretty much everything they make me do. They, however, have no idea, because I have tried to win their approval and love so desperately that I have smiled and taken it all with the hope that they will finally show that they care about me too.
This is the first time I have ever written/told someone about any of this, and it's just makikng it feel worse. It's not a relief at all, but I'm so sad, and angry, and bitter and desperate that I'm just trying to catch myself on something before I completely drown in my emotion.
