I'm going insane.. Please, help me!! ;((

[marigold]

I think I'm going insane! I don't know how to explain it! I wasn't like this before! I mean.. Now I'm so touchy and quarrelsome, much more than what's considered normal! I realise that and still can't control it! When someone said something that's just little different from my opinion I feel offended and start an argument! The worst part is that the one who's a victim of my behaviour is my boyfriend and I'm afraid it wouldn't be far in time when he gets tired of my bullshits and break up with me! The thought itself that he consider me crazy (I think so) and he's not so keen of me as, let's say, in the beginning of our relationship, drives me crazy! I feel humiliated because of my own personality! I think all that's because all my life I've been so underestimated and I didn't gain good treatment from the others and now I'm angry and revengful, partly unconsciously, partly consciously, and I wanna pay all them back because I was so terribly unhappy and depressed and I still am! ****.. I was such a good person!.. Wanna kill myself!! ;(