luckyplatypus said:
Just_Some_Dude said:
luckyplatypus said:
Lonesome Crow said:
Lonliness is a chioce. A feeling, a habit, an addiction, a life style.
Loneliness is not a choice. It is a sort of pain in response to negative stimuli, and exists in order to motivate you to change things so you stop hurting. It works just like physical pain. For example when you get burnt by something, you feel pain to tell you to change what you are doing until you are no longer in pain and being burnt. To say loneliness is a choice is to say that physical pain as a result of an injury is a choice. You seem to be over dramatizing it.
we have more control over how we perceive (or better yet, what we perceive) as loneliness, than we do physical pain though. to be fair. i see both your points. i think lonesome crow was just saying it never hurts to readjust your outlook to try to find a little peace.
To be fair I only skimmed the rest of his post after reading that. I wanted to share that point of view though because it was really interesting to me when I was first presented with it. There is a marvelous book that came out in the past year called
Loneliness by Cacioppo and Patrick, which explains what exactly loneliness is and why it is while citing tons of studies, a number of which conducted by the authors in Chicago. It helped me a lot and now I seem to be doing a lot better.
Back to the topic at hand, the idea of monotony or things being like that forever depressed me very much before I started breaking down the mental steps I was taking with help from the aforementioned book. That feeling of not being able to see the light at the end of the tunnel was what drove me to wind up in two separate mental facilities for suicidal thoughts and actions. If you want my advice based on what helped me, start breaking down what you're thinking, figuring out why you're thinking that way, and so on. Providing reason and purpose to your emotions, I guess. It's like a mental version of defusing a bomb, tracing wires back to the source and whatnot.
Anyway, I'll cease my rambling.
It's still by chioce no matter how to try to colure it...after you get to
the core, after defusing the bomb, removing vails/delusions.
It's a chioce you made.
Unhealhty or not, painful or not...you made that chioce.
You can chose to staying in your pains or do something healthy about
it.
As I stated before...you don't lack motivations.
You're either more motivated to be lonely or more motivated to not be lonely.
Being lonely has it's pay off...It was convient. i din't have to face anything. I didn't have to deal with anyone.
In other words it's just another form of escape....
Knowing that you made that chioce is unlocking your miseries.
You're no longer living in denial...No one to blame, even yourself.
If you have the power to make the chioce to be lonely...you also
have the power to make decision and take actions to not be lonely.
You are free to make different chioces. In other words CHANGE
You can simply make different chioces, alter your actions. Change your life.
It might not be easy to get yourself out of a rut, a hole you dug for yourself, or break your habits and addiction of lonilness.
You simply didn't get lonely overnight.
True...Jenni died. Sherry was a selfish, self centered person.
However ...i still made a chioce to isolate myself and not deal with life on life's terms.
It was my chioce to become lonely...Jenni is dead, she didn't make that chioce for me.
Sherry..don't give a fresia. She didn't make this chioce for me either.....
Life is unfair...but it was my chioce to be lonely.
It's not about blaming myself or anyone else. It's not about judging myself. It's about acknowleging the truth. I made the chioce to be lonely or isolated myself.
The truth will set me free....
It's not convient for me to step out of my comfortzone.
It's not convient for me to reach out to people.
It's not convient for me to have hope again.
It's not convent for me to want to trust again.
It's not convient for me to want to love again.
It's not convient for me to fall in love again.
It's not convient for me to be happy...
True..I'm fucken done with my miseries becuase I've had had enough....it's always fucken refundable though.
So I'm making chioces today not to be my own fucken victim...I'm my own worst enemy.
