CrazyGuy123
Member
- Joined
- Feb 14, 2014
- Messages
- 11
- Reaction score
- 0
Some while ago, i posted about my troubles with life and school on here. i recieved some messages that helped me for some time and told me it would get better. Soon after i was expelled from uni cause of a group project and got used to "not having friends". I tried everything in my power to improve myself as a person to be like those that sit at the cafe and have a good time, or like those that go to work and have something they are good at. I am now sitting here nearly 4 years after my first thread, and i can tell you it hasn't gotten any better for me, it actually got worse. I am not a perfect person, but i all through these painful last few years i always thought "Why me?".
My Mental state has become worse, i still live at home, no money,haven't been able to get a job - no matter what i do with the CV. Sometimes i wonder what i did in my past to deserve this. i have just giving up hope at this point. i probably sent out about 800 job applications in the last year and my mail box is filled with rejections and not a single interview invite. My vision is getting worse and so are my other senses.
i tried studying Programming in the last few months in the hope of getting anywhere with it, but i also failed at that.
sometimes i wished for my siblings to experience what i am experiencing, but tbh i don't want them to go through with the chaos that i have been through. all hope is lost for me, my future is the nightmare i tried to avoid my whole life, but i guess i gotta live a life filled with anxierty, embarresment and sadness.
My Mental state has become worse, i still live at home, no money,haven't been able to get a job - no matter what i do with the CV. Sometimes i wonder what i did in my past to deserve this. i have just giving up hope at this point. i probably sent out about 800 job applications in the last year and my mail box is filled with rejections and not a single interview invite. My vision is getting worse and so are my other senses.
i tried studying Programming in the last few months in the hope of getting anywhere with it, but i also failed at that.
sometimes i wished for my siblings to experience what i am experiencing, but tbh i don't want them to go through with the chaos that i have been through. all hope is lost for me, my future is the nightmare i tried to avoid my whole life, but i guess i gotta live a life filled with anxierty, embarresment and sadness.