lgbt out there?

[cumulus.james]

"community" is just the acceptd word in the community
LoL
definitely isnt always "warm and cozy"
everythn has its positives n negatives
sum ppl choose nt 2 interact w/the community
sum ppl interact w/it sumtimes
n sum ppl r very strong in the community
its all a matter of personal choices

Nonsense.

 

[Chasm]

"community" is just the acceptd word in the community
LoL
definitely isnt always "warm and cozy"
everythn has its positives n negatives
sum ppl choose nt 2 interact w/the community
sum ppl interact w/it sumtimes
n sum ppl r very strong in the community
its all a matter of personal choices

Nonsense.

LoL wtf james

 

[cumulus.james]

"community" is just the acceptd word in the community
LoL
definitely isnt always "warm and cozy"
everythn has its positives n negatives
sum ppl choose nt 2 interact w/the community
sum ppl interact w/it sumtimes
n sum ppl r very strong in the community
its all a matter of personal choices

Nonsense.

LoL wtf james

That is the sort of stuff the arrogant shallow queens on gaydar come about with its not befitting of a person on a forum for lonely/depressed people!

I dont get a choice in the matter how do I get a choice? If I had a choice to intersct with a community then I would choose to do so and not be on here sat on my own and alone.

The 3 things that unite most truly lonely people on here are 1)lack of support 2) Lack of social skills and 3) Depression I dont choose to have those. gay men especially like their stereotypes and they like people who follow the crowd. I would not be welcomed by any circle of gay men in the UK. Gay men can not bare depression or self pity, they wont give you the time of day if you display those traits (unless your a "twink" in which case they can pretend to be interested in your feelings to try to get to shag you). A gay man learns that I am bipolar or I dont like glee and I'm finished.

This was ok when I was 22 and half a piece of ass. People overlooked my quirks. now I am just seen s "different". Not interested. Go watch the xfactor get a generic Alan Carr wannabe persona and never mention your feelings or mine then come back to me.

 

[roguewave]

James, I'm totally lost here.

One of the best friends I've ever had was very flamboyant and different/quirky/weird. He literally put the queer in queer but always managed to get dates.
I thought that guys liked other guys who had their own sense of self, independent from the mainstream?

 

[Chasm]

nt sure how thngs might wrk in the uk
but in the us?
its a choice how involvd u want 2b in the community
u want 2b involvd?
u get out there
u go 2 the conventions
u go 2 the rallies
etc
u get involvd in the ACTIVITIES OF the community
wut ur tlkng about james?
is ur own difficulty w/relationships
yes>>
that can b a focus IN the activities OF the community @ times?
but there is a lot more 2 it than that

 

[cumulus.james]

nt sure how thngs might wrk in the uk
but in the us?
its a choice how involvd u want 2b in the community
u want 2b involvd?
u get out there
u go 2 the conventions
u go 2 the rallies
etc
u get involvd in the ACTIVITIES OF the community
wut ur tlkng about james?
is ur own difficulty w/relationships
yes>>
that can b a focus IN the activities OF the community @ times?
but there is a lot more 2 it than that

If things are so simple as hat then why are you on here? I mean its easy just go out and join a community there's no excuse chop chop pull yourself together man!!!

You appear to be saying that not just me, but the whole of this forum chooses to be lonely?

 

[Chasm]

again>>
ur connectng community involvment directly transversd 2 ur individual success w/men
not very rel8d james
2 diffrnt animals
n i m involvd w/2 communities
a lot of ppl who work here also combat loneliness
just bcuz ur AROUND ppl doesnt mean ur ne less apt 2 lonely

 

[mana]

This issue is not black or white. there is a wide gray area. you can be lonely as well as being part of the "community" as well as being not lonely and not a part of it.

I don't think being gay made me feel lonely. I do however think it reflects on every issue in my life in one way or another. I wake up with it and fall asleep with it.

Being lonely is a choice in some point - at least in my case. I wasn't lonely until 3 years ago so I think something psychological and/or something in my brain have caused my loneliness situation.

Ans yes I am not a part of the gay community.. However, I do have some bad habits related to this community such as not having a serious relationship for two years...

 

[Chasm]

all well said
tho?
it is tru that being a membr?
of the lgbt community>>
can b a catalyst 4 loneliness
since it makes u "diffrnt"
but that would apply 2 any othr diffrnce fr "avg society" also
it all depends on how u view n deal w/ur diffrnces
that has a lot 2 do w/how othrs view n deal w/them 2
iv noticd the more comfortable u r w/urself?
the more comfortable othrs r w/u 2

 

[mana]

@Chasm

so what shall one do when he does not feel comfort with himself?

 

[cumulus.james]

See I went into a local gay Chatroom last night. within 10 minuets they were all instructing me to kill myself. That very much sums up gay men in the uk. Rather be alone than have to change myself to fit in with such nasty people. I dont like myself but I like myself better than i like gay people right now!

I know what your gonna say "not all gays are like that", I know legend has it there are decent gay men in the world. But I have never experience any. Arrogant, self obsessed, shallow, fake, two-faced and damned right nasty is all Ive come across.

I think that is why I start gay threads s on here, I keep thinking that if a gay guy has found his way to a forum about loneliness then he might have a bit of depth.

I tell you another thing also you never meet such a narrow minded bigoted people in your life as the gay guys round here. The only way your allowed to be different is if your drag. For example I can be a bit gothy and I used to like wearing nail varnish and eye make up when I used to go out. I would literally get bullied for it.

 

[roguewave]

I've always loved that gothy look.

What about trying to find gay women to hang out with for friendship?

 

[cumulus.james]

I've always loved that gothy look.

What about trying to find gay women to hang out with for friendship?

The lesbians round here tend to be very bolshy and arrogant and that. You need to be a very confident person to get on with them and they tend to have hundreds of friends anyhow. How would I meet a lesbian for gods sake anyway?

 

[roguewave]

Idk. You can chat with me if you want.

 

[cumulus.james]

Idk. You can chat with me if you want.

I like chatting with you already, you seem cool

 

[Esca]

Re: LGBT out here.

I'm here.

 

[cumulus.james]

Well hello

 

[reynard_muldrake]

Just stopping by (I'm part of the "G"). I am willing to talk to anyone else, though.

 

[cumulus.james]

Hi reynard, given how the gay scene is for men currently, I am amazed this forum is not flooded with them!

Either there is something deeply wrong with me or matters are worse. I was gay cruising at 13, 22 yrs later and I find myself more isolated than I was in the homophobic 90s. The gay bars that spread out from the gay villages in the late 90s all closed and if you are not under 30 and gym fit no gay guy will talk to you. I find that no gay man under 60 would piss on me if I was on fire. That is a trauma for me, given they used to pay to fresia me.

 

[reynard_muldrake]

Was there a sense of closeness back then? From what I've seen, everyone's all spread out now. So many sub-communities and whatnot. The problem for me, anyway, is finding gay guys to befriend. I've found enough willing to talk to me, but many weren't friend material.