akyia
Member
i'm female. i live in central Illinois. and i just turned 29. so i get to be 29 for the next ten years!
Akyia is my cat's name. She'll be 8 on May 1.
i love to read--philosophy, classic lit., postmodern lit., and books about depression. i like to jog, hike, rollerblade, and when it's too cold outside, i workout on my eliptical. i watch a fair amount of tv shows and movies. i like to cook and bake. i just took up painting.
i've been lonely and depressed (clinically) for most of my life. i've never belonged. guys don't like me. i had a few friends growing up, but always felt like an outsider. in college, my depression got really bad and i couldn't develop any friendships.
during and after college, a few people came into my life who seemed to care about me and wanted to be there for me while I was struggling with depression and suicidal thoughts. i became emotionally attached to a couple of them; but they all abandoned me.
i wanted close relationships so much for so long. but then, last summer, i inexplicably stopped wanting relationships so much. maybe i was giving up, resigning myself to a solitary life. since then, being alone hasn't been excruciating, but it's still very painful.
Akyia is my cat's name. She'll be 8 on May 1.
i love to read--philosophy, classic lit., postmodern lit., and books about depression. i like to jog, hike, rollerblade, and when it's too cold outside, i workout on my eliptical. i watch a fair amount of tv shows and movies. i like to cook and bake. i just took up painting.
i've been lonely and depressed (clinically) for most of my life. i've never belonged. guys don't like me. i had a few friends growing up, but always felt like an outsider. in college, my depression got really bad and i couldn't develop any friendships.
during and after college, a few people came into my life who seemed to care about me and wanted to be there for me while I was struggling with depression and suicidal thoughts. i became emotionally attached to a couple of them; but they all abandoned me.
i wanted close relationships so much for so long. but then, last summer, i inexplicably stopped wanting relationships so much. maybe i was giving up, resigning myself to a solitary life. since then, being alone hasn't been excruciating, but it's still very painful.