LonelySutton
Well-known member
- Joined
- May 10, 2014
- Messages
- 721
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I think I have decent self esteem, but I think one of the biggest issues in my life is that I always shoot too low in every aspect of my life. My co worker just got a new job and I stumbled upon her offer letter by accident -- it was in the common mail box. Her salary- obscene. Even though I have sort of equal goods and experience... I never even considered going for one of those jobs. In my heart I feel I wouldn't do well there because they are for "winners" and I am not one. But I never even tried.
When I was younger I had a bit of a spark. But I only had that spark when I was allowed to be nieve' about my life and pretend good things were going to happen. As I started seeing them not happen my eye of the tiger dropped out.
Same with marriage and kids. So I dated some guys half heatedly but I honestly think in the back of my head I had this idea that it was pretty pointless (accurate or not) I should have been working for the best guy I could get instead I just kind of sat around and waited for people to ask.
Maybe it is an energy issue, I know I have less energy than most... but, I also feel like I am just healthy enough not to be released from the expectations and disappointments of life.
When I was younger I had a bit of a spark. But I only had that spark when I was allowed to be nieve' about my life and pretend good things were going to happen. As I started seeing them not happen my eye of the tiger dropped out.
Same with marriage and kids. So I dated some guys half heatedly but I honestly think in the back of my head I had this idea that it was pretty pointless (accurate or not) I should have been working for the best guy I could get instead I just kind of sat around and waited for people to ask.
Maybe it is an energy issue, I know I have less energy than most... but, I also feel like I am just healthy enough not to be released from the expectations and disappointments of life.