Me, myself and the rest of us

[lusker]

I think that somewhere in my DNA is an incompatibility gene. I can't be myself around anyone, not even my wife, because they wouldn't want to know the real me. They prefer the version I've made for them, and for years I kept every aspect of my life separate so that my worlds wouldn't collide. My work self was unrecognisable from my married self which was unrecognisable from my private self. It helped to keep my world small - not engage in hobbies or sport or the community, even though I wanted to - because I was running out of alters.

The thing is, over time the public alters have amalgamated. Now they are one. The guy I am at work is now the guy I am at home. I am stepping out into the world, doing new things, because the alter I've become seems to be someone people can associate with. Maybe even like.

But it's still not me. Before I die I'd like to meet someone who likes that person. But it's hard to imagine another creaure so foul.

 

[9006]

Hello Lusker.

I think in your DNA there's gym genes too by the looks of your pic.

But yeah I kinda know what you mean, I've felt this before. But in my personal experience me thinking that was a clouded version of myself without me even realising it.

Welcome to the forum!

 

[ladyforsaken]

I know you're jealous, 9006.

Hi lusker, welcome to the forum.

I've learnt something from my previous relationship. Stop being someone I'm not and to be honest in my wants, needs and thoughts as well as to have boundaries.

Do you mean when you say it's not you, that you act differently in those different situations on purpose?

 

[Veruca]

Aww 9006, no need to be jealous, we all still love you with or without packs

Hey Lusker. In so many ways I can relate to what you're saying. For me personally, I think being different people in different groups works better than being myself with everyone, but I have carefully chosen a few people I'm very close to, to know the real me. And it doesn't matter if people disagree with such a concept because ultimately if you can do something with peace of mind and a clear conscience, then that's enough.

If people seem to treat you well with an amalgamated personality, then perhaps things aren't so bad? Perhaps who you think you are isn't so awful?

And maybe, you can start to show the real you little by little to the people you are closest too? You may be surprised at how accepting your loved ones might be of the person you think you really are.

And a very warm welcome to the forum!

 

[9006]

Why does everyone think I don't have 'em already??

haha

 

[Veruca]

Why does everyone think I don't have 'em already??
haha

OMG you sexy beaassst

 

[ladyforsaken]

Why does everyone think I don't have 'em already??
haha

OMG you sexy beaassst

Lmao Veruca!

 

[Veruca]

Why does everyone think I don't have 'em already??
haha

OMG you sexy beaassst

Lmao Veruca!

 

[9006]

Hope you're referring to me!

 

[ladyforsaken]

Hope you're referring to me!

 

[Veruca]

Hope you're referring to me!

Of course!

 

[ladyforsaken]

Hope you're referring to me!

Of course!

Why are you feeding his ego??

 

[Veruca]

Hope you're referring to me!

Of course!

Why are you feeding his ego??

I'm crazy...crazy for 9006..lol

Sorry about sabotaging your thread Lusker

 

[9006]

I wouldn't be! I just wanted to be clear

 

[Veruca]

Awww and here we thought you had such a big ego

 

[9006]

Such a big what? Oh ego.. maybe haha

 

[ladyforsaken]

Such a big what? Oh ego.. maybe haha

Lol see!

 

[Veruca]

Such a big what? Oh ego.. maybe haha

Lol see!

What can I say Lady, 9006's sexy abs made me irrational

 

[ladyforsaken]

*whistles* I see a cute pair forming here

 

[Gondwanaland]

I can't be myself around anyone.

You're not alone, Lusker. We have masks to hide some aspects of our lives.

Welcome to the forum. You can be yourself here and no one's gonna criticize or offend you for it.