Mobile phones

[putter65]

Hello Everybody !

I've never liked mobile phones and upto a couple of years ago I didn't own one. I decided to buy a basic one because I thought it would come in handy. So I bought one and added my brother as a contact. Two years on and I have a grand total of three people on my contact list. One is a woman I worked with 10 years ago. I bumped into her last year and she asked for my mobile number. So I sent it to her using facebook. She's never rang me or sent a text.

The other is another woman. I worked with her until this January. When she left she gave me her mobile number and said keep in touch. (As a side issue I have a massive crush on her and I was delighted she gave me her number !)

Of course I never knew how many texts to send her beause it was all new to me. That was three months ago. At first she replied to most of my texts, now she hardly does. I never wanted to get on her nerves so I always restricted myself to one a week, at the most two. Now I'm sending one every two or three weeks. But she's answered one out of my last four. She did come on facebook a couple of weeks ago and say she was sorry for not replying. She had forgotten to.

My brother is exactly the same, hardly ever replies to my texts and never sends me one first.

People at work know I have a mobile but never ask for my number.

I'm just wondering what I'm doing wrong ? Everybody else seem to live on their phones, they are always texting, looking at their phones.

Facebook is quite similar. Nobody sends me a message and they hardly reply to mine. I do sometimes wonder why I bother sending texts and messages to people when I don't get replies.

 

[SenjiiDragon]

I have the same issue. I have some friends who don't reply to texts very often. Do they not care? Are they not interested in being friends or talking to me? If they don't respond, do I send them another one? How often do I text them to stay in contact, but not make them think I am needy or clingy?

I'll let you know if I figure out the answers.

And don't worry if other people seem to be always checking their phones. They might be like me and checking their phone to see that they yet again have no new messages. Or they could be posting to this site using their phone!

 

[Minus]

Yeah i don't know that checking means anything. I knew a guy who would go around talking on his cell phone for appearance. The phone didn't even work. Another that would play like he was texting.

I have never had one and never had any interest in getting one, so i am afraid that i am of no help.

 

[putter65]

Yeah i don't know that checking means anything. I knew a guy who would go around talking on his cell phone for appearance. The phone didn't even work. Another that would play like he was texting.

I have never had one and never had any interest in getting one, so i am afraid that i am of no help.

lol - I always wonder when I see blokes walk around yakking away on their phone, is there anybody on the other end ? - I think they are showing off -'look at me, look how interesting my life is !'

And then you get the ones who have things stuck to their ears. Why ? Because they are so important, work needs to be touch every second ?

I thought buying a mobile would improve my social life but it hasn't.

 

[jjam]

...

 

[putter65]

I have the same issue. I have some friends who don't reply to texts very often. Do they not care? Are they not interested in being friends or talking to me? If they don't respond, do I send them another one? How often do I text them to stay in contact, but not make them think I am needy or clingy?

I'll let you know if I figure out the answers.

And don't worry if other people seem to be always checking their phones. They might be like me and checking their phone to see that they yet again have no new messages. Or they could be posting to this site using their phone!

I have the same issues with this woman. I don't want to swamp her with texts every day and then when she doesn't reply, send her one saying 'have you gone off me ?' or something like that. It just sounds soft. I started sending 2 a week and now it's one every 2 weeks. I think it's best not to mention other texts that didn't get a reply. Of course the obvious thing is not to send any more texts but that doesn't help in the long run because I will be back to square one having no friends.

Also, my last text, I just wished her an happy easter. I didn't ask her any question that needed a reply. So a reply from her would be a bonus. If I'm happy doing this (and I am) then this is the way to go. I am facebook friends with her as well and she deletes alot of people from her friends list (mostly men) and I haven't got the chop yet so I must be doing something right.

 

[user 9172]

I got a phone 3 or 4 years ago. Had some people from uni (who I never phoned or texted,) my dad, and my house number in it for a long time and never used it much at all. I use my phone more this past year, but even now it is largely for work. I've started texting with an online friend of mine as of just over a week ago though, which is nice and we swap a couple of texts almost daily.

If getting replies to your texts matters to you then I think maybe you need to make them more exciting for the other person. I mean, the other person might have a lot of people texting them and not have the time or desire to reply to texts every 15 minutes. I don't think it is a sign that someone isn't interested in you or doesn't like you though. It might be a sign that they're not as invested in you as you in them though.

 

[putter65]

I got a phone 3 or 4 years ago. Had some people from uni (who I never phoned or texted,) my dad, and my house number in it for a long time and never used it much at all. I use my phone more this past year, but even now it is largely for work. I've started texting with an online friend of mine as of just over a week ago though, which is nice and we swap a couple of texts almost daily.

If getting replies to your texts matters to you then I think maybe you need to make them more exciting for the other person. I mean, the other person might have a lot of people texting them and not have the time or desire to reply to texts every 15 minutes. I don't think it is a sign that someone isn't interested in you or doesn't like you though. It might be a sign that they're not as invested in you as you in them though.

I can imagine she gets loads of texts from her friends. Mine probably get lost in all of them. How do you make them more exciting though ? I have included a few jokes and not got a reply, sometimes I ask direct questions and that hasn't always worked. The alternative is to not bother sending them but that won't achieve much because I'll be back to square one : having no friends.

It shows how friendless / lonely I am when her giving me her mobile number was so important.

 

[Code S.O.L]

They are useful tools to have in emergencies, but for people like myself, that's all they're used for. My phone can go for months without any phonecalls being made to, or from it.

 

[putter65]

They are useful tools to have in emergencies, but for people like myself, that's all they're used for. My phone can go for months without any phonecalls being made to, or from it.

People at work laugh at me when I tell them my £5 top up lasts for 6 months.

I never take it with me anyway because there isn't any point.

Regrading that woman, she came into my work a couple of months ago for a cuppa and a chat. I asked her if she minded me sending her texts and she said she didn't. She did give me her number when she left. I suppose if I don't send too many and I can be bothered then I will carry on sending them.

 

[I'm Fine]

I get the same reaction to me when I say the same thing about my top ups. I don't get texts (apart from selling ones or odd ones from the school) and I don't text (no-one to text). It's basically so my mother/the school can phone me when I'm out if necessary. That's it. Boring, I know.

 

[putter65]

I get the same reaction to me when I say the same thing about my top ups. I don't get texts (apart from selling ones or odd ones from the school) and I don't text (no-one to text). It's basically so my mother/the school can phone me when I'm out if necessary. That's it. Boring, I know.

I got excited the other day when I saw I had 3 texts. All of them were from T Mobile though ! lol !

I don't think my mobile has ever rang, I sometimes text my brother and now I text that woman. I do enjoy sending her texts. If she doesn't reply then so what ? I think that's the best attitude to have.

My Facebook experiences are the same. I have 28 friends on there. (Most people have over 100 don't they ?) Some family members, some people will my unusual surname, people from work, a few people I don't know who I've chatted to on a shyness forum.

What's daft is when somebody 'likes' my status or makes a comment it makes me happy. It's so pathetic really. I do notice when some people write stuff they get 30 comments, when I write stuff, most of the time nobody comments even though I try to make them as funny as I can.

 

[I'm Fine]

I've got 84 'friends' on Facebook and I know precisely 2 of them - and only count one of them as a friend. They're on their for the games - you know the ones where if you don't have 3 million friends you don't get anywhere (unless you pay actual money and THAT'S not going to happen).

 

[putter65]

I've got 84 'friends' on Facebook and I know precisely 2 of them - and only count one of them as a friend. They're on their for the games - you know the ones where if you don't have 3 million friends you don't get anywhere (unless you pay actual money and THAT'S not going to happen).

There's people I don't want to be facebook friends with. All the managers, a few of the others. I used to write things like 'work was s**t today' and then this notice went up in the canteen warning us not to say anything bad about work.

 

[I'm Fine]

This is the advantage of not working. No bosses to complain about. I also don't actually post anything on Facebook. It's LITERALLY just for the games. Nothing personal on there at all.

 

[user 9172]

I can imagine she gets loads of texts from her friends. Mine probably get lost in all of them. How do you make them more exciting though ? I have included a few jokes and not got a reply, sometimes I ask direct questions and that hasn't always worked. The alternative is to not bother sending them but that won't achieve much because I'll be back to square one : having no friends.

It shows how friendless / lonely I am when her giving me her mobile number was so important.

Callback to things, compliments, lots of smileys, don't be afraid to be totally random. I mean, you have a crush on her right? Flirt with her.

So what if it shows how lonely you are? We're all lonely here, right?

 

[putter65]

I can imagine she gets loads of texts from her friends. Mine probably get lost in all of them. How do you make them more exciting though ? I have included a few jokes and not got a reply, sometimes I ask direct questions and that hasn't always worked. The alternative is to not bother sending them but that won't achieve much because I'll be back to square one : having no friends.

It shows how friendless / lonely I am when her giving me her mobile number was so important.

Callback to things, compliments, lots of smileys, don't be afraid to be totally random. I mean, you have a crush on her right? Flirt with her.

So what if it shows how lonely you are? We're all lonely here, right?

I'v had a crush on her for 6 months so this is the tail end of things. I asked her to the cinema, she said 'no' - she was nice after though, no awkard moments. When she left my work, I told her how much I thought of her. What is a bit odd is a week after that she asked if she could come to watch me play golf. So in March she came along and we had a great time. We both really enjoyed it. Since then not really heard from her much. And for an awfull couple of weeks I thought I had made an arse of myself. But she's chatted on facebook a few times since then so everything is cool.

Just thought it was odd she wanted to hang about with a guy who's asked her out.

I try not to pay her too many compliments because I'm not sure it is the right thing to do. I say 'take care' and 'have a nice day' things like that. I told her 'i care for her' in a text but that's it.

 

[kamya]

I have a small amount of numbers on my phone as well. Maybe around 20-30. I'm also notorious for missing calls or not replying to txts right away (or at all sometimes). Hell sometimes my phone can be dead in my car for a few days before I charge it up and check for messages.

It's not that I don't care, it's just that I don't really like being able to be contacted at any time by anyone with my number. I just don't pay attention to my cell phone much at all really. The only time I pay attention to my cell phone is when I'm waiting for a call for a job interview or something important. The people that know me understand this and they know there are much better ways to contact me (msn) so they usually don't bother much with txts or phone calls.

It's the same with Facebook. I might check it a few times a week in case I miss something important. I don't put up pictures really, I usually untag myself, and I've disabled writing on my wall. I just really don't like the idea of being constantly "connected" and on call for everyone who knows me. Most Facebook interactions are all small talk and lack the depth of face to face communication. It's kind of the same in xat too actually. For some reason if you can one on one chat some people on xat or talk to people you meet online one on one it seems to be a little better. But talking online with people who you first met in the physical world just isn't satisfying nope.

 

[putter65]

I have a small amount of numbers on my phone as well. Maybe around 20-30. I'm also notorious for missing calls or not replying to txts right away (or at all sometimes). Hell sometimes my phone can be dead in my car for a few days before I charge it up and check for messages.

It's not that I don't care, it's just that I don't really like being able to be contacted at any time by anyone with my number. I just don't pay attention to my cell phone much at all really. The only time I pay attention to my cell phone is when I'm waiting for a call for a job interview or something important. The people that know me understand this and they know there are much better ways to contact me (msn) so they usually don't bother much with txts or phone calls.

It's the same with Facebook. I might check it a few times a week in case I miss something important. I don't put up pictures really, I usually untag myself, and I've disabled writing on my wall. I just really don't like the idea of being constantly "connected" and on call for everyone who knows me. Most Facebook interactions are all small talk and lack the depth of face to face communication. It's kind of the same in xat too actually. For some reason if you can one on one chat some people on xat or talk to people you meet online one on one it seems to be a little better. But talking online with people who you first met in the physical world just isn't satisfying nope.

I could never imagine meeting someone online. There is something not right about it. I can't understand how a woman could like me because of words I'm typing on a screen.

I do like keeping in touch with people I already know online.

 

[I'm Fine]

Ok, so words on a screen don't come with tone or body language to help you understand their meaning BUT they still convey information and help people get to know you. AND people are often more candid online than in real life (it feels safer to talk about potentially hurtful topics when you don't see the person you're talking to). So yes, people can form friendships and other attachments simply via online messages. The hard part is translating it over to real life.