My sister just confessed that she created a fake profile to toy with a desperate man

[Tiina63]

It's not something that attractive people do, it's something that insecure people do. You've already described her set of issues. Rather than getting upset, which is the kind of response she's trying to evoke, you should let her know that you're sorry she's hurting badly enough to do something like that. That way, instead than getting a kick from it, she'll realize what it really makes her look like: someone in need of help.

Excellent reply. I agree completely.

 

[rollingtrouble]

Lonesome Crow definitely has his enemies here. I guess he tells it like he sees it, which can either be a positive or negative thing, to different people.

He managed to get 30 or so points, because half the time he does offer helpful advice. But he is also majorly screwed up, and offers bad advice as well. This is one of them.

My sis is now mad, because my mom criticized her smoking, and told her to go smoke in the car. Unless she is a lurker on here, and is mad about that, too? I don't know if she realizes how I feel about her actions - I do love her dearly, but she makes bad decision after bad decision.

And it's not only cruel, it's unnecessary. She has 5 kids, no job, no income, and isn't going to school. What the fresia is she doing, exactly? That's what pisses me off. Okay, she threw together a dishwasher full of dirty dishes last night...great. I am the one feeding the animals, loading the dishwasher, doing laundry, cleaning up her messes (oh, did I neglect to tell you that she has turned our house into a pigsty?), and trying to deal with anxiety when she yells at her troubled 7 year old.

Great life right now, just great. I cope by writing music, listening to music, writing here, reading, and diving into my coursework at college. As a SA sufferer, I would avoid everyone else, anyway, but I have to push myself to interact, since she does jack honeysuckle.

Oh, I feel for you man, I really do. You can pick your friends but not your family. And I'm so sorry there are kids involved in her life that are affected by her bad decisions. I know that you care for her. Sometimes all you can do is try to be there for her kids, and try to help her pick up the pieces of her life once she gets tired of they way things are, and wants to make a change for the good. Thats where the love comes in, and she is very lucky to have you around. Until she recognizes the issues she has, and wants to change, things won't change. It is indeed a sad situation thats affecting many innocent people in her life, and I hope things get better soon for all concerned. Stay strong for her kids and help them the best you can, they are the most innocent victims in the whole thing.

 

[VanillaCreme]

I don't know if she realizes how I feel about her actions - I do love her dearly, but she makes bad decision after bad decision.

I feel the same way about my brother. He's very intelligent, but it doesn't show with the stupid decisions he's made. I'll be the first to admit how smart he is. I just wished he showed it more. I used to hate that all attention was turned on him, and it seemed like no one ever paid attention to me. But I realize now, that I'm not the one who needs it. I don't make bad decisions like he does. I think in the long run, and I make choices based on that.

He married a girl who did drugs and drank, who lied about her age, who cheated on him before and after they were married, and all in between every break up... AND he had the nerve to blame me and my mom for marrying her. Claiming that he only married her because mom is sick and he knew she wanted to see one of us get married before she died.

Just a whole bunch of senseless, silly honeysuckle. Still though, I know once mom is gone from this world, that I'm going to be the only one who will ever be able to get him out of any trouble he puts himself in. I'm two years younger than he is, and I've been bailing him out of tough situations and helping him pull his pieces back together for years now. What's sad to me is that he's never appreciated me or what I've done for him. I've done more for him in our lifetime than anyone else - excluding our parents and our mommom - and he refuses to give me any thanks. In fact, when my back was hurting so bad, I couldn't even stand up straight and walk, he started to call me lazy when I couldn't clean and cook like normal.

Didn't give me any support, not a word of comfort... Nothing. I know it's hard, and I know you care about her and love her, but you can't fix or change her or anything she does. You have to let it go and let her do what she wants. Because in the end, she's going to anyway. It's just sad that they refuse to listen to reason.

 

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

Took a nap, and my mom managed to put into words while I was sleeping all of this honeysuckle. My sister listened, understood, and she's going to try to do better next time.

I understand she went off and did her own thing, and she needs to screw up. But she's getting closer to 40. She needs to act like an adult.