rothniel
Active member
Here's some background:
I'm the eldest of three boys. I'm twenty-eight, and the other two are twenty-two and sixteen respectively.
Both of my parents are clinically depressed introverts, my mother much more so than my father. When I was four my mother decided that the world was a big bad scary place and decided to move our family (then of just the three of us) outside the city limits into the country.
I did not have an unhappy childhood, but it was a lonely one. Fortunately after a long while I found a true friend at school (since I saw no one but my family at all other times) and he helped me develop some social skills. My brothers have not been so lucky.
Alan (or so I'll call him) is the middle brother. He graduated high school and has no motivation in life (which I understand). He is now my roommate, and I've been trying to help him meet people. He has no friends. He wants to meet a nice girl, but he doesn't know how.
The youngest, Jay (or so I'll call him) had it the worst. My mother, over-protective as she is, took him out of junior high and started homeschooling him. That would have been fine if he had any sort of social contact outside the immediate family whatsoever, but he doesn't. He, also, has no friends.
I get them involved when I can. The three of us share several interests but none of which are very conducive to meeting new people. They want to make friends, but because they have had so little chance and so little experience they are naturally very reserved. It took me a long time to learn to open up and talk to people at all, and I'm afraid it will be even more difficult for them.
I've asked advice from a lot of different people. I know that ultimately all of this will have to come down to the decisions they make for themselves. But I'm trying to do everything I can to help my younger brothers who can't find help anywhere else. I'm also still dealing with some anger toward my mother for isolating us. I made it out okay, but they really haven't yet. I know she was just doing what she thought best...but it simply wasn't.
Any thoughts or suggestions are welcome. Chances are, I've already tried it, but fire away.
I'm the eldest of three boys. I'm twenty-eight, and the other two are twenty-two and sixteen respectively.
Both of my parents are clinically depressed introverts, my mother much more so than my father. When I was four my mother decided that the world was a big bad scary place and decided to move our family (then of just the three of us) outside the city limits into the country.
I did not have an unhappy childhood, but it was a lonely one. Fortunately after a long while I found a true friend at school (since I saw no one but my family at all other times) and he helped me develop some social skills. My brothers have not been so lucky.
Alan (or so I'll call him) is the middle brother. He graduated high school and has no motivation in life (which I understand). He is now my roommate, and I've been trying to help him meet people. He has no friends. He wants to meet a nice girl, but he doesn't know how.
The youngest, Jay (or so I'll call him) had it the worst. My mother, over-protective as she is, took him out of junior high and started homeschooling him. That would have been fine if he had any sort of social contact outside the immediate family whatsoever, but he doesn't. He, also, has no friends.
I get them involved when I can. The three of us share several interests but none of which are very conducive to meeting new people. They want to make friends, but because they have had so little chance and so little experience they are naturally very reserved. It took me a long time to learn to open up and talk to people at all, and I'm afraid it will be even more difficult for them.
I've asked advice from a lot of different people. I know that ultimately all of this will have to come down to the decisions they make for themselves. But I'm trying to do everything I can to help my younger brothers who can't find help anywhere else. I'm also still dealing with some anger toward my mother for isolating us. I made it out okay, but they really haven't yet. I know she was just doing what she thought best...but it simply wasn't.
Any thoughts or suggestions are welcome. Chances are, I've already tried it, but fire away.