Not sure what to do . . .

[st642]

Thanks in advance for reading a wacky girl problem . . .

So, there's a female friend that I've known since sometime in January, I think. In the time we've known each other, we've frequently talked about relationships that have failed, or in some cases potential relationships that failed before they even got started.

This was the case last night, as she was frustrated that a potential relationship fell through, and that she hates that she's single. But then she adds that a guy she went on a date (said she wasn't sure if it really was a date) once popped back up again. She thought he was flirting with her when they last talked, but she didn't realize at the time.

But as we continued talking it just got into more of how bad and frustrating it is being single. I tried to drop some hints and imply that we were both single. Nothing became of that. So what should I do? Drop more hints, be direct, not do anything? Never been in a situation like this before, and I obviously don't know what she's thinking.

 

[Treehere]

Been here before lol.

It's well possible that she simply hasn't considered the idea yet of you two together. I would suggest dropping some hints next time you touch on this conversation and watch her reaction carefully. Now I don't know her myself, but it should give you some inkling, for example if she looks a bit uninterested or detatched, it might be a no-go.

Girls like it when things are clear, so if you feel confident about it, take the plunge, as her out and see what becomes of it. And if that doesn't work, simply take this as good life experience and try to stay friends with her!

Good luck!

 

[evanescencefan91]

hey st642 tree here has a great point be direct and confident, girls like confidence.


just be casual and let here know that hey if this thing with that guy doesn't work out I'd love to take you out for dinner sometime

I hope it works out , you seem like a nice guy

 

[Badjedidude]

You have to be direct about it. She sees you as a friend. Try romancing her a bit and flirting with her. The key is to introduce yourself to her as also a sexual being, not just a friend to talk to when she's feeling down.

 

[Electric_Fusilier]

...and if, in the end, she says to you 'can we just be friends', then don't look on it as a defeat. Remember, the person can transcend the relationship; and there is much to be said for having a platonic galpal - a guy can let his guard down a bit with a female friend, and can talk to her about those emotional and vulnerable things which he often can't talk about with other men (and I'm sure she'd be receptive: in my experience, most woman LOVE it when a guy lowers his guard a little; women want to know what makes men tick just as much as men want to know what makes women tick)

And besides - it's not unknown for friendships to develop into something deeper, so who knows...

 

[Papabear]

Be direct, don't be clingy, don't be too available.

Tell her what YOU want, then leave it at that. If she doesnt return interest then don't push the point.

 

[st642]

Thanks for all the replies! I will be direct about it next time I get the chance. Hopefully it will go well.

 

[freedom]

hi.

first things first, do you like this girl? it may sound like a dumb question, but you didn't make it clear if you do or not. the reason i'm asking is because if you do like her, then i would go with the direct approach and tell her straight up what you feel for her and that you'd like to spend some time with her to get to know her.

if you don't like her and you're just looking for a relationship because you yourself are also tired of being single, then i would just keep dropping hints. why? because in this case, i don't think you'd be too motivated to be in a real, meaningful relationship and dropping hints here and there would be like casting your line out over and over to see if the fish bite. if they bite, then great. if not, that's great too.

on the flipside, it sounds to me like she's also casting her line at you. if you don't bite, there are always other ponds to cast it out on.

best of luck!!!

 

[st642]

hi.

first things first, do you like this girl? it may sound like a dumb question, but you didn't make it clear if you do or not. the reason i'm asking is because if you do like her, then i would go with the direct approach and tell her straight up what you feel for her and that you'd like to spend some time with her to get to know her.

if you don't like her and you're just looking for a relationship because you yourself are also tired of being single, then i would just keep dropping hints. why? because in this case, i don't think you'd be too motivated to be in a real, meaningful relationship and dropping hints here and there would be like casting your line out over and over to see if the fish bite. if they bite, then great. if not, that's great too.

on the flipside, it sounds to me like she's also casting her line at you. if you don't bite, there are always other ponds to cast it out on.

best of luck!!!

I do indeed like her. I really wouldn't have considered pursuing it just for the sake of not being single. Interesting that you think she might be interested as well. Obviously I've wondered that before. I guess I'll find out soon enough.