Ode to The Most Interesting Man

[Badjedidude]

-His picture counts as a WMD.

-He can crack a coconut by staring at it.

-300 Spartans could not defeat him in battle. Sorry, Gerard Butler.

-His scent is so powerful that it can draw women for hundreds of miles.

 

[MissGuided]

-Signs that say, ‘This is not an exit’…don’t apply to him.

-Even lucha libres remove their masks in his presence.

-He serves sizzling fajita platters barehanded.

-Mosquitoes refuse to bite him – purely out of respect.

 

[frizzler]

-He's the only one that called Chuck Norris a wuss and lived.

 

[Badjedidude]

-He once rode Joe Camel through the Sahara in a pan-Maghreb race. And won.

-He earns $5 for every $1 he earns.

 

[MissGuided]

-The front of his house looks like it was built by the Mayans…because it was.

-He can open a piñata with a wink and a smile.

-Even if he forgets to put postage on his mail, it gets there.

 

[Badjedidude]

-Ever wonder who really came up with the original KFC chicken recipe? Yup. It was him.

-The Indiana Jones franchise was modelled after his life.

-If you ever want to win an argument, just drop his name in the debate.

-His wine collection is worth more than Microsoft.

 

[MissGuided]

-If you were stuck in an elevator with him, you wouldn’t want to be saved.

-Even watching him sleep has been described as breathtaking.

-He is left-handed. And, right-handed.

 

[Badjedidude]

-When he dances, even the music stops to watch.

-When he loves a woman, she stays loved. Forever.

-He's fantastically rich, but never pays for anything. All of his money goes to charities.

 

[MissGuided]

 

[Badjedidude]

^^^hahaha

 

[MissGuided]

^No, that one was way better than mine!


-You can see his charisma from space.

-He has been pronounced dead 7 times…make that 8.

-He is against cruelty to animals, but isn’t afraid to issue a stern warning.

 

[MissGuided]

 

[Badjedidude]

-He can count pi out to an infinite number of decimal places.

-He can divide by zero.

-When he plays a guitar, it sets itself on fire.

 

[MissGuided]

-If there was an interesting gland, his would be larger than most men’s entire lower intestines.

-He has won the lifetime achievement award – twice.

-He charm is so contagious, vaccines have been created for it.

 

[Badjedidude]

-His penis cannot be measured in feet. Or yards.

-He could be given the Nobel Peace Prize for committing an act of war.

-He didn't enjoy reading Fifty Shades of Grey; 50 was not enough for him.

 

[MissGuided]

-His penis cannot be measured in feet. Or yards.

OMG, The Most Interesting Man....is Limlim??? :O

 

[Badjedidude]

OMG, The Most Interesting Man....is Limlim???

I don't know. He's never showed his kak to me. *shrug*

 

[MissGuided]

^Well, it's real and it's spectacular.


-Were you to pass him on the street and he didn’t see you, you would still feel like he said hello and asked you about your day.

-The Aztec calendar has his Cinco de Mayo party chiseled in.

-Regardless of temperature, you can never see his breath.

 

[Badjedidude]

^Well, it's real and it's spectacular.

Ew, no thanks.

I'm only gay for pay.

-He's invented more things than NASA.

-He's unnaturally quiet; even when he's loud.

-Legend has it that when he was growing up, he was the one to discipline his parents.

 

[MissGuided]

-His shirts never wrinkle.

-He is left-handed. And, right-handed.

-The police often question him, just because they find him interesting.