Online Dating?

[TheRealCallie]

Going out on a limb here and will assume that is to Nilla and me, because...well, it always is with you.

Neither one of us said that. Nice try, though.

 

[kamya]

Stop caring about what society thinks. Stop caring what some crap website says.  Start being yourself, start finding some confidence, start worrying about your **** self.

And when they still fail then what?

Keep on truckin'

The funny thing about this comment is that the actual guy that came up with "Keep on truckin'" is extremely resentful and sexist towards women.

[Youtube]rTOM6qzmjYY[/youtube]

He was basically saying all the honeysuckle most of the guys in this thread are saying. And that was before online dating made the situation even worse. Today that guy would not stand a chance. He barely did back then.

 

[VanillaCreme]

He was basically saying all the honeysuckle most of the guys in this thread are saying. And that was before online dating made the situation even worse. Today that guy would not stand a chance. He barely did back then.

Because it's more of what's the point of being nasty about it? Not all women want to date him or whatever guy... So what? Move on. We're not supposed to click with absolutely everyone.

 

[Azariah]

how bout offline dating???? anyone here up for it.... oh wait....

 

[VanillaCreme]

how bout offline dating???? anyone here up for it.... oh wait....

Not sure what you mean by this. But, online can turn into offline, in person.

 

[user 139760]

Okay firstly to the people commenting that men just complain a lot these days, I’d say consider how you’d feel about a man reacting that way to the suffragette movement back in the day. “Women like to complain a lot theses days”. Yes they did, and they had good reason. You can wave a dismissive hand if you like, but IMO this isn’t a problem that’s going to go away just because you refuse to see the merit in in the arguments you’re hearing. Men have gotten a raw deal and they’re pissed about it. That’s why the popularity of feminism is sinking like a lead balloon.

To those saying men on Tinder are just looking for sex, I can only assume you’re either female or haven’t spent much time on tinder, because most of the women on there are also looking for sex. Most of the women I match with have the exact same story. Split with husband x months ago, went on a tinder sex spree and got laid by a bunch of hot guys. They often say they did it to “get their confidence back”. Some admit they just like having sex with hot guys.

And to the person who told me to “stop worrying about what society thinks”... what??? I don’t know where that came from or what it has to do with the conversation.

Ah. Right. Opinion null and void because "reasons".
Gotcha, Cap. Won't happen again.

 

[DarkSelene]

Stop caring about what society thinks. Stop caring what some crap website says.  Start being yourself, start finding some confidence, start worrying about your **** self.

And when you still fail then what?

If you fail, that means you gave up, which means, you didn't do any of that....

My compulsion is with consistency and truth, not with the moronic and crass shell of arrogance anyone wear to appear tough. Keep flattering yourself tho, it's my treat.

 

[TheRealCallie]

Okay firstly to the people commenting that men just complain a lot these days, I’d say consider how you’d feel about a man reacting that way to the suffragette movement back in the day. “Women like to complain a lot theses days”. Yes they did, and they had good reason. You can wave a dismissive hand if you like, but IMO this isn’t a problem that’s going to go away just because you refuse to see the merit in in the arguments you’re hearing. Men have gotten a raw deal and they’re pissed about it. That’s why the popularity of feminism is sinking like a lead balloon.

To those saying men on Tinder are just looking for sex, I can only assume you’re either female or haven’t spent much time on tinder, because most of the women on there are also looking for sex. Most of the women I match with have the exact same story. Split with husband x months ago, went on a tinder sex spree and got laid by a bunch of hot guys. They often say they did it to “get their confidence back”. Some admit they just like having sex with hot guys.

And to the person who told me to “stop worrying about what society thinks”... what??? I don’t know where that came from or what it has to do with the conversation.

Ah. Right. Opinion null and void because "reasons".
Gotcha, Cap. Won't happen again.

Ikr. Lol

No one said ALL guys, and no one said women don't.  But there are more men than women.  

Um, everyone complains.  However, here on ALL, it's pretty evident that men want it all and don't want to do the work needed to get what they want....yeah yeah, I'm a heartless *****, blah blah blah   ... They keep doing the same thing over and over again, maybe slightly changing it up, but not really.  

Which brings us to society and how you don't think it's relevant.  Though, if you look, you would see it comes up in every thread like this.  Society decides who is and is not a loser, silly.  Society decides who is and is not successfully, silly.  Society is GOD!!!!

 

[TheSkaFish]

And if they keep failing forever and no amount of effort works, they find this place because they have nothing else, they complain because there's nothing left to try and they see people going through the same things and it's a confirmation of how hard it's going for males in general... and you guys show up to say they're giving up too easy.

+1

That's what I'm afraid of. I'm afraid that an average guy is all I'll ever be able to be and it won't be good enough, even though it's all that most other guys are doing. For some reason, it just won't work for me. I'm afraid I'll only ever be able to click with people who don't appeal to me, or that I'll never be able to click with anyone. I'm afraid that I'll fail forever, and no amount of effort will work. I feel like there's got to be a reason why things tend to not go my way and there's got to be something I can do to fix it, because there's no way that my luck is just this bad that this is the best I can be and I'm just a dud of a person. But I have no idea what to do. I really struggle with this bleak feeling that nothing I do will have any impact on my situation.

 

[kamya]

Okay firstly to the people commenting that men just complain a lot these days, I’d say consider how you’d feel about a man reacting that way to the suffragette movement back in the day. “Women like to complain a lot theses days”. Yes they did, and they had good reason. You can wave a dismissive hand if you like, but IMO this isn’t a problem that’s going to go away just because you refuse to see the merit in in the arguments you’re hearing. Men have gotten a raw deal and they’re pissed about it. That’s why the popularity of feminism is sinking like a lead balloon.

To those saying men on Tinder are just looking for sex, I can only assume you’re either female or haven’t spent much time on tinder, because most of the women on there are also looking for sex. Most of the women I match with have the exact same story. Split with husband x months ago, went on a tinder sex spree and got laid by a bunch of hot guys. They often say they did it to “get their confidence back”. Some admit they just like having sex with hot guys.

And to the person who told me to “stop worrying about what society thinks”... what??? I don’t know where that came from or what it has to do with the conversation.

Ah. Right. Opinion null and void because "reasons".
Gotcha, Cap. Won't happen again.

Ikr. Lol

No one said ALL guys, and no one said women don't.  But there are more men than women.  

Um, everyone complains.  However, here on ALL, it's pretty evident that men want it all and don't want to do the work needed to get what they want....yeah yeah, I'm a heartless *****, blah blah blah   ... They keep doing the same thing over and over again, maybe slightly changing it up, but not really.  

Which brings us to society and how you don't think it's relevant.  Though, if you look, you would see it comes up in every thread like this.  Society decides who is and is not a loser, silly.  Society decides who is and is not successfully, silly.  Society is GOD!!!!

Easy to say when you're not the gender that has to actually do the work. Men have it much harder in online dating. I'd say that's why men complain more about it here. Why do you think it's called "getting lucky"?

Almost every woman here could fall into a relationship with an average guy within the week if they decided they want one. 

You'll never get it. 

If women were paid 20 cents to every 80 cents a man made doing the exact same job, would they complain or just work 4x the hours and call it fair? 

If the online dating tables were reversed we'd be hearing the same complaints coming from women.

 

[TheRealCallie]

Wrong.  EVERYONE has to work to get what they want.  You may not want to believe it and you may not see it, but they do.

Online dating isn't a magical place.  It's the same as offline, only you have more options because of distance. And if you think "average" women don't have a hard time with online dating too, you are kidding yourself.  There are even threads here talking about it.  The reason those don't take off like the ones the men make is likely because the women don't usually...notice I said usually ...go on and on saying the same things over and over again blaming everyone else and refusing to think they might be doing something to put them where they are.  "Average" and even "below average" men get dates quite often.  But wait...mthey must be rich or something, right?

 

[kamya]

Wrong.  EVERYONE has to work to get what they want.  You may not want to believe it and you may not see it, but they do.

Online dating isn't a magical place.  It's the same as offline, only you have more options because of distance. And if you think "average" women don't have a hard time with online dating too, you are kidding yourself.  There are even threads here talking about it.  The reason those don't take off like the ones the men make is likely because the women don't usually...notice I said usually ...go on and on saying the same things over and over again blaming everyone else and refusing to think they might be doing something to put them where they are.  "Average" and even "below average" men get dates quite often.  But wait...mthey must be rich or something, right?

No.

Those threads don't take off because they don't actually exist. If they did, they wouldn't gain traction because it would be like complaining to a starving homeless person about how you don't like any of the food at the buffet. If you are a woman and are actually having trouble finding dates through dating apps then your standards are unrealistic or you're being too picky. It's that simple.

 

[ardour]

Because sending hundreds of tailored messages with no replies doesn't qualify as work.

 

[kaetic]

Wrong.  EVERYONE has to work to get what they want.  You may not want to believe it and you may not see it, but they do.

Online dating isn't a magical place.  It's the same as offline, only you have more options because of distance. And if you think "average" women don't have a hard time with online dating too, you are kidding yourself.  There are even threads here talking about it.  The reason those don't take off like the ones the men make is likely because the women don't usually...notice I said usually ...go on and on saying the same things over and over again blaming everyone else and refusing to think they might be doing something to put them where they are.  "Average" and even "below average" men get dates quite often.  But wait...mthey must be rich or something, right?

No.

Those threads don't take off because they don't actually exist. If they did, they wouldn't gain traction because it would be like complaining to a starving homeless person about how you don't like any of the food at the buffet. If you are a woman and are actually having trouble finding dates through dating apps then your standards are unrealistic or you're being too picky. It's that simple.

Here's my most recent experience on a dating site.
I made my profile, that was torture... as I actually hate talking about myself.
Then I scrolled through the matches. The guys ranged from attractive, to average, to not so attractive.
That wasn't the issue.
The issue was me. It didn't matter who I was looking at on the screen.
Every time I thought I might want to message one of them. I thought about the reasons why this person wouldn't want to match with me. I beat myself up about all of my self esteem issues then closed the site and gave up on it.
All without sending a single message.

How are my standards unrealistic? How am I being picky? I'm just afraid of rejection like the lot of you guys are. That's not a ******* gender issue.

 

[Xpendable]

Here's my most recent experience on a dating site:
Got 0 matches in six months. The End.

 

[kaetic]

Here's my most recent experience on a dating site:
Got 0 matches in six months. The End.

they just give you a certain number of "matches" for filling out the profile to spur things along
I'm not talking about messages from other people, I didn't stay long enough to find out about that.

 

[Xpendable]

I'm not talking about messages either. I used tinder because 100% of dating sites will charge me to even see another member's profile.

 

[kaetic]

I'm not talking about messages either. I used tinder because 100% of dating sites will charge me to even see another member's profile.

I'm not familiar with how Tinder works.
I've never used it, because it's generally for sex hook ups right?
I'm not judging, it's just not what I'm looking for.

I was unaware that guys had to pay to view profiles. That's pretty messed up.
I can't message or like profiles without paying, and apparently there are other services
these dating sites offer (unsure what those are)... but after my last meltdown just from
looking at profiles, I didn't see the point in paying.
Match.com is the one I'm talking about.

 

[ardour]

Wrong.  EVERYONE has to work to get what they want.  You may not want to believe it and you may not see it, but they do.

Online dating isn't a magical place.  It's the same as offline, only you have more options because of distance. And if you think "average" women don't have a hard time with online dating too, you are kidding yourself.  There are even threads here talking about it.  The reason those don't take off like the ones the men make is likely because the women don't usually...notice I said usually ...go on and on saying the same things over and over again blaming everyone else and refusing to think they might be doing something to put them where they are.  "Average" and even "below average" men get dates quite often.  But wait...mthey must be rich or something, right?

No.

Those threads don't take off because they don't actually exist. If they did, they wouldn't gain traction because it would be like complaining to a starving homeless person about how you don't like any of the food at the buffet. If you are a woman and are actually having trouble finding dates through dating apps then your standards are unrealistic or you're being too picky. It's that simple.

Here's my most recent experience on a dating site.
I made my profile, that was torture... as I actually hate talking about myself.
Then I scrolled through the matches. The guys ranged from attractive, to average, to not so attractive.
That wasn't the issue.
The issue was me. It didn't matter who I was looking at on the screen.
Every time I thought I might want to message one of them. I thought about the reasons why this person wouldn't want to match with me. I beat myself up about all of my self esteem issues then closed the site and gave up on it.
All without sending a single message.

How are my standards unrealistic? How am I being picky? I'm just afraid of rejection like the lot of you guys are. That's not a ******* gender issue.

All you needed to do was wait until your inbox filled up, We can't because we don't received initiating messages/matches in the first place.

 

[kaetic]

Wrong.  EVERYONE has to work to get what they want.  You may not want to believe it and you may not see it, but they do.

Online dating isn't a magical place.  It's the same as offline, only you have more options because of distance. And if you think "average" women don't have a hard time with online dating too, you are kidding yourself.  There are even threads here talking about it.  The reason those don't take off like the ones the men make is likely because the women don't usually...notice I said usually ...go on and on saying the same things over and over again blaming everyone else and refusing to think they might be doing something to put them where they are.  "Average" and even "below average" men get dates quite often.  But wait...mthey must be rich or something, right?

No.

Those threads don't take off because they don't actually exist. If they did, they wouldn't gain traction because it would be like complaining to a starving homeless person about how you don't like any of the food at the buffet. If you are a woman and are actually having trouble finding dates through dating apps then your standards are unrealistic or you're being too picky. It's that simple.

Here's my most recent experience on a dating site.
I made my profile, that was torture... as I actually hate talking about myself.
Then I scrolled through the matches. The guys ranged from attractive, to average, to not so attractive.
That wasn't the issue.
The issue was me. It didn't matter who I was looking at on the screen.
Every time I thought I might want to message one of them. I thought about the reasons why this person wouldn't want to match with me. I beat myself up about all of my self esteem issues then closed the site and gave up on it.
All without sending a single message.

How are my standards unrealistic? How am I being picky? I'm just afraid of rejection like the lot of you guys are. That's not a ******* gender issue.

All you needed to do was wait until your inbox filled up,  We can't because we don't received initiating messages/matches in the first place.

When you start up a dating profile they don't automatically populate a screen with pictures of profiles the website wants you to check out? That's what I'm talking about when I say "match" and I'm pretty sure it's not something they just do for the women. Although you guys have made me pretty curious about setting up a fake profile to see how men get treated on there, you know, for shits and giggles.

Also, messages wouldn't have made a difference. I psyched myself out because of my own issues, a stranger saying hello wouldn't have mattered, especially because I didn't share a picture.