Online forums end up making me feel worse

Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum

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ManDss

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Ive been joining and using forums since 5 or 6 years ago. I havent done any solid contact or friend.

In depression forums is so hard to find others who also want to chat in private message. I always thought that would be a lot of people dealing with loneliness wanting to meet other people who deal with the same in other parts of the world.

Sometimes I spend 2 whole days reading this kind of forums, replying topics, sending private messages, and then there is no much replies back.

I also never find people I can relate to, sometimes I end up having some chats but with people, but we are just too different.

The thing is that, like today, I think "ok, lets try with this forum again", and the posts look so old, the people seem unactive, Ive made topics about wanting to conect and having very few replies. Its like... damn, meet people online seems just not an option, I knew I shouldnt put so much hope again on this, but it makes me feel like in a void.
 

Adamridge79

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Well, yes. It's not a chat room. Granted, I've only been here since October, and I rarely find someone I match with to talk to personally. But, in the forum itself, you at least get to have some that agree, usually like to disagree, but debate civilly, or just people that need to vent. A literal virtual cornucopia is the truest sense.
 

sunflowergirl1306

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Well, yes. It's not a chat room. Granted, I've only been here since October, and I rarely find someone I match with to talk to personally. But, in the forum itself, you at least get to have some that agree, usually like to disagree, but debate civilly, or just people that need to vent. A literal virtual cornucopia is the truest sense.
I agree,people will or won't talk to you,it's all about what they choose to do.
 

TheRealCallie

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Okay, this is just my opinion and I could be completely wrong, but you get out what you put in. You've been on this forum for almost a year and you only have 40 posts. I get that you would rather talk privately, but you have to look at the audience you have. People want to get a sense of you to find out about you....who you are, how you converse...and you don't really interact with people on the forum. Sure, you post in other threads sometimes, but it's just one and done. You don't engage on the forum.

So, my advice would be to engage. Participate, be included. That's when you find people you connect with. You can't really do that when you only post in your own threads and most of those are just complaining. I'm not saying you can't complain, but there has to be more than just that.
 

sunflowergirl1306

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Okay, this is just my opinion and I could be completely wrong, but you get out what you put in. You've been on this forum for almost a year and you only have 40 posts. I get that you would rather talk privately, but you have to look at the audience you have. People want to get a sense of you to find out about you....who you are, how you converse...and you don't really interact with people on the forum. Sure, you post in other threads sometimes, but it's just one and done. You don't engage on the forum.

So, my advice would be to engage. Participate, be included. That's when you find people you connect with. You can't really do that when you only post in your own threads and most of those are just complaining. I'm not saying you can't complain, but there has to be more than just that.
agreed
 

sunflowergirl1306

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Ive been joining and using forums since 5 or 6 years ago. I havent done any solid contact or friend.

In depression forums is so hard to find others who also want to chat in private message. I always thought that would be a lot of people dealing with loneliness wanting to meet other people who deal with the same in other parts of the world.

Sometimes I spend 2 whole days reading this kind of forums, replying topics, sending private messages, and then there is no much replies back.

I also never find people I can relate to, sometimes I end up having some chats but with people, but we are just too different.

The thing is that, like today, I think "ok, lets try with this forum again", and the posts look so old, the people seem unactive, Ive made topics about wanting to conect and having very few replies. Its like... damn, meet people online seems just not an option, I knew I shouldnt put so much hope again on this, but it makes me feel like in a void.
I'll tell you this,to be honest,I can post a post on here,and 2 days later someone will reply to it,some people on here just like to read other people's posts on the forum,and that's ok.
 

Minus

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I'll tell you this,to be honest,I can post a post on here,and 2 days later someone will reply to it,some people on here just like to read other people's posts on the forum,and that's ok.

"A rule about online engagement has floated around the internet for a while, called the Rule of Participation Inequality, or the 90-9-1 Rule. The rule goes something like this:

User participation in any online internet community generally follows the 90-9-1 rule:

90% of community members are lurkers who read or observe, but don’t contribute
9% of community members edit or respond to content but don’t create content of their own
1% of community members create new content"


From www.higherlogic.com
 

sunflowergirl1306

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"A rule about online engagement has floated around the internet for a while, called the Rule of Participation Inequality, or the 90-9-1 Rule. The rule goes something like this:

User participation in any online internet community generally follows the 90-9-1 rule:

90% of community members are lurkers who read or observe, but don’t contribute
9% of community members edit or respond to content but don’t create content of their own
1% of community members create new content"


From www.higherlogic.com
that's why I said that it was ok if people just like to read other people's posts on here.
 

TropicalStarfish

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This forum, in my experience, has been -very- inactive for a few years now. So, that in itself, will explain your troubles here.

Secondly, forums in-of-themselves, are not as widely used by the generations coming up, and even people in general; people transition to the facebooks, tiktoks, instagrams, etc..

The internet is not inclusive anymore. It's exclusive. You have to make it into a friend-list, or a group, or a who-who's who type of situation. Discord seems to be the most active, as far as chatting goes. I've had little success there myself; though, I prefer not to use it, as it is proprietary software that collects information about it's users.

And, as people age, they tend to become exclusive, as well. They have an established circle of friends, and just aren't interested in meeting new people; they have, "settled down." So to speak...

This forum used to be quite active... Politics and entropy eventually erode everything away, eventually, it seems...
 

orangecat

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The internet is not inclusive anymore. It's exclusive. You have to make it into a friend-list, or a group, or a who-who's who type of situation. Discord seems to be the most active, as far as chatting goes. I've had little success there myself; though, I prefer not to use it, as it is proprietary software that collects information about it's users.

And, as people age, they tend to become exclusive, as well. They have an established circle of friends, and just aren't interested in meeting new people; they have, "settled down." So to speak...
I feel the same way especially about established circles of people and it's hard to approach them without a lot of anxiety.
 

Adamridge79

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What if they're not established, but just a giant pain in the ass of the regulars? Does one just conform in the hopes the dominant ones throw you the table scraps?
 

orangecat

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What if they're not established, but just a giant pain in the ass of the regulars? Does one just conform in the hopes the dominant ones throw you the table scraps?
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