panic in skype talks

[Wayfarer]

I had never really used skype for voice talk before joining ALL, and so I was surprised when I realized I panicked big time whenever I'd voice talk with more than one person at a time. Even if I had already written many times to the people in question.

In real life, although I wouldn't define myself very sociable, since I'm extremely introverted, I have no trouble talking to strangers, if they address me first. So I don't understand why I have that problem on voice talk.

I have tried again and again hoping that things would change but.. it's always the same. And I don't know why that is either. So idk.. have you gone through something similar or do you have some advice?

 

[LonesomeLoner]

There's nothing wrong with just using the IM.

I only use voice when playing Minecraft with 1 person, but other than that I'm too shy to do voice.

 

[Rosebolt]

Personally, i tend to start feeling insignificant when there's more than one other person around, and it makes me shy away. I also feel more vulnerable, and feel attacked easier. I also have this with general group conversations though, through text.

Do you know if the problem could be in that ball park for you? Feeling without control, vulnerable, or insignificant?

 

[VanillaCreme]

I like group chats on Skype. I'm so used to them, that it's weird when I do only talk to one person. But the best thing I could even say as any sort of advice is to try and relax. I know that's way easier said than done, but you've talked to these people often in PMs or IMs, so you're comfortable with them on some level. Just try and bump that comfort level up a bit when it comes to Skype.

 

[Aisha]

I like both. If you feel uncomfortable, just take it a step at a time, short calls one-on-one at first and progress from there. You know you're welcome to call me whenever =)

 

[9006]

I'd much prefer typing to talking, same when someone calls me. Sometimes I don't answer, then just text afterwards, lol. Talking seems to take a lot of time and energy, almost feels like laziness.

 

[Nicolelt]

Just ease into it. I didn't talk much when I started skyping. Once you get comfortable with people it's better.

 

[DesertWolf]

You might find it hard to believe when you see me in group voice/video chats today, but there was a time when I had panic attacks just being in a text chat room.

What worked for me was applying CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) - I tried to think rationally about what thoughts were causing the fear/panic response and how to constructively and rationally address these thoughts. It seems for most people the issue is fear of being ridiculed for their ideas/voice, and being ignored.

I realized eventually that these fears were based on a lack of self-esteem and assigning too much importance to what others thought about me. Learn to reduce panic through breathing exercises and remember that it's just a feeling, not something that will kill you. It obviously also helps a LOT to have these chats with considerate people who are good listeners.