Questions for the Women

[user 108508]

^LOL - you're on a roll tonight!

 

[ThisModernLove]

Is it better to compliment you on an article of clothing or a physical attribute of yours?

"Your coat looks lovely" vs "You have a beautiful smile" which would you prefer?

Personally, I prefer the smile comment. But I know some of us work very hard to maintain a beautiful, shiny coat.

The internets salutes you for that.

 

[ardour]

Do you have many male friends who aren't already part of your boyfriend's/partner's social circle?

 

[Solivagant]

Do you have many male friends who aren't already part of your boyfriend's/partner's social circle?

I've had more male friends than female friends in my life.

 

[CHSlater]

probably been asked before, but It seems like any man under 5 11 is considered “short” these days. Is looking down on your partner a deal breaker?

**** it, I've lost the discussion about "men's heights"! well, better late than never. I'd like to say to you, ardour, That I am a 6 feet 2 inches man. I've also posted my face on this forum and women here have said I have "beautiful eyes" (which implies that I'm not ugly at least, I guess). My first kiss came when I was 22 years old (two years ago).
So, you can see here that it's more about your attitude than it is about your height/appearance.

 

[VanillaCreme]

Do you have many male friends who aren't already part of your boyfriend's/partner's social circle?

I've had more male friends than female friends in my life.

Same with me. All of them I was already friends with - the mutual ones, and friends that are not his friends.

 

[ladyforsaken]

Question for the ladies... What's the best, least creepy way for a random guy to compliment you?

Smile, be yourself and be genuine with what you're complimenting.

Do you have many male friends who aren't already part of your boyfriend's/partner's social circle?

Yes.

 

[Alma lost her spoon]

Question for the ladies... What's the best, least creepy way for a random guy to compliment you?

There's lots of great tips to be had here....
[video=youtube]

 

[ardour]

unpleasant question:

Would you date the son or sibling of a child molester?

 

[ladyforsaken]

unpleasant question:

Would you date the son or sibling of a child molester?

Why not? I don't see why I should treat anyone differently just because someone related to them is a particular way or have a particular behaviour. I won't judge people based on their relatives. It doesn't mean anything. I'd give them a chance, if they don't behave appropriately, then I'd take my distance.

 

[user 108508]

Would you date the son or sibling of a child molester?

Personally, no. I just wouldn't want to get mixed up in that scenario.

 

[ThisModernLove]

What if you didn't know and you had already developed deep feelings for this person?

 

[Solivagant]

Would you date the son or sibling of a child molester?

For me it would depend on how involved they are with said child molester. If they wanted that person to be around a lot, then I'd think twice. But if they more or less kept their distance from that person, then I'd probably be alright with it.

The thing is that I really have no problem dating someone with a relative like that. I don't blame people for their relatives. However, if I thought I could end up having children with that person in the future, I would have a big problem with the children being around the molester.

 

[ardour]

For me it would depend on how involved they are with said child molester. If they wanted that person to be around a lot, then I'd think twice. But if they more or less kept their distance from that person, then I'd probably be alright with it.

The thing is that I really have no problem dating someone with a relative like that. I don't blame people for their relatives. However, if I thought I could end up having children with that person in the future, I would have a big problem with the children being around the molester.

Assuming they had nothing to do with the relative.
Even with no contact I think a lot of women would have reservations about dating someone, and certainly about having a family with a man who's father was a paedophile, for example. They may think him more likely to turn out to be an offender due to a) being molested as a child, b) a genetic predisposition. Ignoring this, the awareness of the fact alone could be enough to kill attraction.

 

[Solivagant]

For me it would depend on how involved they are with said child molester. If they wanted that person to be around a lot, then I'd think twice. But if they more or less kept their distance from that person, then I'd probably be alright with it.

The thing is that I really have no problem dating someone with a relative like that. I don't blame people for their relatives. However, if I thought I could end up having children with that person in the future, I would have a big problem with the children being around the molester.

Assuming they had nothing to do with the relative.
Even with no contact I think a lot of women would have reservations about dating someone, and certainly about having a family with a man who's father was a paedophile, for example. They may think him more likely to turn out to be an offender due to a) being molested as a child, b) a genetic predisposition. Ignoring this, the awareness of the fact alone could be enough to kill attraction.

I don't really understand the purpose of your response. Are you arguing with my post? Trying to make a point? Saying you don't believe me? I was only speaking for myself, not all women everywhere. I thought you were asking for opinions. =/

 

[ardour]

I don't really understand the purpose of your response. Are you arguing with my post? Trying to make a point? Saying you don't believe me? I was only speaking for myself, not all women everywhere. I thought you were asking for opinions. =/

Probably shouldn't have picked your post to respond to. Yes I was interested in opinions. Not to start an argument, but I might suggest that what people say and how they really feel are often different. Not that I'm accusing anyone of deliberately being dishonest, of course a lot of women would want to be fair minded about this issue, while underneath still feeling uncomfortable with the idea of bonding to a man with this sort of background. I was curious about whether that was the case and whether women would be willing to admit to feeling that way. There's got to be a lot men out there who have paedophile fathers and want to hide that (me) and I would say it's human nature and understandable to be more wary of someone in those circumstances.

Edit. this discussion is a bit icky.. apologies mods.

 

[SophiaGrace]

I don't really understand the purpose of your response. Are you arguing with my post? Trying to make a point? Saying you don't believe me? I was only speaking for myself, not all women everywhere. I thought you were asking for opinions. =/

Probably shouldn't have picked your post to respond to. Yes I was interested in opinions. Not to start an argument, but I might suggest that what people say and how they really feel are often different. Not that I'm accusing anyone of deliberately being dishonest, it's just that course a lot of women would want to be fair minded about this issue while underneath still feeling uncomfortable with the idea of bonding to a man with this sort of background. I was curious about whether that was the case and whether women would be willing to admit to feeling that way. There's got to be a lot men out there who have paedophile fathers and want to hide that, and I would say it's human nature and understandable to be more wary of someone in those circumstances.

My father molested me when I was 11.

I think I would react in the way Solivagent did.

The sins of the parents are not the sins of the children….

Though I've been made to feel like that once or twice during my undergraduate years as a psychology major. Sitting in a class where we were learning about how a higher percentage of child molestors had been molested as children.

It made me upset, as if they were implying I was one or would become one.

---

Do you have many male friends who aren't already part of your boyfriend's/partner's social circle?

Yes. I am a pro at being platonic friends with guys. It just comes naturally.

And…predictably no one ever believes me that we are just friends. They're easier to talk to for some reason.

No feelings are ever involved either.

We talk about concepts and interests

---

probably been asked before, but It seems like any man under 5 11 is considered “short” these days. Is looking down on your partner a deal breaker?

Not that I'm aware of is it a deal breaker but I have noticed there are some more masculine traits that draw me to men sexually.

…platonically is different.

But then again, I've not felt romantic attraction to a guy in at least 5 years.

So, I have no idea what I want anymore.

 

[ardour]

^^Sophia, that sucks, but the female children of a molester aren't going to be judged that way.

 

[SophiaGrace]

Question for the women - how do you like to be approached? In what context? Are common interests and being able to share conversation, laughter, and jokes with a guy enough, provided the guy has the basics covered (job/income, is groomed and in at least decent shape, is friendly and trustworthy, etc.)? Or does a guy just have to have some coolness and cockyness about him to cause any feelings of excitement?

I'm trying to think of what turns me on sexually with men.

I can't think of any one particular thing.

But more masculine men are sexy. I'm trying to think of how to quantify this though.

But also slim dashing hipster men are sexy too.

Warm smiles, beautiful eyes, nice groomed facial hair…confidence. Kindness and attentiveness. Literary.

*drool*

Why am I drooling over my own fantasy of a guy?

I would never freaking approach any of these guys in reality. I would get so intimidated that I'd stammer and not be able to complete a full sentence.

It'd be absolutely no good. There's no way I could ever have a relationship with a guy I couldn't get 2 words out around.

 

[ardour]

..but it's true.