Seems I've made another mistake...

[Angelight]

Well, got dumped again for absolutely no reason. Twice now I've had the sweet innocent girl I'm aiming for dump me for no reason, break my heart, and go back to her **** ex. And again, when I ask her why, she can't even give me an answer. What am I seriously doing wrong? I tried my very best to please her and I've done literally nothing to deserve this. But whether I deserve it or not, I'm still in serious pain. For this to happen two times in a row within about a month really does hurt and it makes me consider some lengthy extremes. From torturing her to killing myself, all the wounds that girls opened up again are making me really consider ending it all. I just can't get a break to save my life. I would really like to know what I'm doing wrong or how to fix this so hopefully I don't end up doing something stupid.

 

[PinkDelusion]

Sometimes, no matter how perfect you try to be for someone, no matter how much you try so hard to please them, they still manage to break you into a million pieces. You probably did nothing wrong, or maybe something about her ex made her go back. I'm not sure. I always get dumped for being too depressed, so honestly I have no clue how she even dumped despite the fact you tried to be there for her even at her lowest.

My sincere apologies. I do emphasize with you though.

 

[Angelight]

Sometimes, no matter how perfect you try to be for someone, no matter how much you try so hard to please them, they still manage to break you into a million pieces. You probably did nothing wrong, or maybe something about her ex made her go back. I'm not sure. I always get dumped for being too depressed, so honestly I have no clue how she even dumped despite the fact you tried to be there for her even at her lowest.

My sincere apologies. I do emphasize with you though.

Thank you. It hurts alot right now. Being a man of I suppose you can say, logic, I don't understand the whole "connections" business. It makes no honest sense to me. And sooner or later, yeah I probably would've been dumped for being too depressed....

 

[PinkDelusion]

I'm a person of logic too, but there are times when I let my emotions decide for me. -shrugs- if I'm too depressed for people then there's no point in trying to find someone who likes my negative aura. I'm not too optimistic. I honestly stopped caring about trying to change my aura to attract people.

Time heals wounds...although some still cringe at the painful memory.

 

[Ghost Boy]

Wow I'm really sorry that happened to you. I'm no relationship expert or anything but maybe you're catching these girls at a bad time or a time where they're confused. I don't think there is anything wrong with you. Sometimes you can give a person your all and they still don't appreciate you. Don't give up on life. I'm sure there is someone out there that will appreciate you.

 

[Angelight]

Sometimes, I really wonder if I'm cursed or something with bad luck. Seems to follow me everywhere. And that's what hurts me most. The worst part...she wants to keep being friends. She wants to be best friends still...

I can honestly say...that's gonna kill me. She wants me to sit back and look at what I didn't get. I hope she realizes what she's doing and saying, cause she ain't helping me any.

 

[Vagrant Legacy]

Although I understand how difficult such a situation can be for you, there's two things you should perhaps consider about your current situation:
1: You've had two girlfriends within a month? Seems to me like there is at least SOMETHING which you're doing right. At least it seems like you don't have to be worried about never getting into a relationship again...
2: You've had two girlfriends within a month? Seems to me like there's at least one thing that you're doing wrong - isn't it all going a bit too fast ? Don't you think you should at least try and bond a bit first with a girl, before allowing yourself to be so intimate? After all - if you don't become intimate that fast, things going wrong won't hurt half as much...

 

[Lonesome Crow]

Ive been on the receiving end and the giving end of the equation.

The one that fucks me up the most are the onces that simply just died.
What rattle my mind is...those that died were very pretty, kind and loving
and had so much to live for. So much to offer life and the world.
So much life ahead of them. Thier lives cutted short way way too short.

Im not really sure why I left all those women that where for the most
part very nice, kind and loving to me. They were all pretty much the
perfect partner...no one is perfect but these women were what most
guys would want and die for. its all illogical why i would leave them
if I think too much about it...other than the mere fact i had my reasons
and those reason are of self fish nature.

And its also illogically why I've left women that would love me to
seek women that would rip my heart apart over and over again.

I'm not really sure if there some deep mental/emotional pains
or abandentment issues that havnt been resolved within me.
I can try to figure all that honeysuckle out....

but it hits me like a ton of bricks as it always had from
the moment Andrea died. She was my HSGF during our senior year.
She was so beautiful and loving to me...
I actaully stopped partying, being that bad boy and focus on my
education and music. The love and supported Ive always needed and wanted.
I walked her home on good Friday. She passed away on Easter sunday.
LIFE IS ALOT SHORTER THAN YOU THINK.
yeah...maybe that what it is...i felt Andrea had abandent me.

And I hate god for taking her away from me.
Or maybe that's the reason Subconciously I'm affraid to committ to kind loving women
becuase Im afraid they're goning to died on me.
And the honeysuckle gets reenforceed...Years later into my life when Jenni Died.
Jenni resymble Andrea. For the fist time in my life I wanted to take a chance with a nice girl.
When she died...it totally sent me into a tail spin, Not twice in a life time.

So for you to try to figure out other people or the two women that dump you?
Dont try to figure it out....

 

[SofiasMami]

Hi-
It's possible you haven't done anything wrong with these ladies. If they just recently split up with their exes, they may not have been over them. When I'm interested in someone, I try to find out when their last relationship was and whether they were the dumper or dumpee. If they just split up within the last few months and they were dumped, those are big red flags. Run away as fast as you can, because they are probably still pining for their ex. If you were able to meet two women who were interested in you in a month, that's a good sign for you. I think you'll be ok, just take it easy at first when you meet someone you like-

Teresa

 

[Lollipop286]

Well, wanting to end your life because someone broke up with you doesn't seem like a very smart thing to do really, does it? Maybe you haven't done ANYTHING wrong at all, they just weren't interested in a relationship at the moment.
Maybe you have been doing something wrong, they just don't want to hurt your feelings by telling you and just say it's for no reason. Maybe they have taken interested in someone else and just lost all feelings for you, you just really can't know for sure.

Anyways, I hope you do end up finding someone in the end.

 

[annik]

I honestly don't want to cause offence but perhaps you need to stop looking for relationships right now and work on yourself and your own feelings. It really doesn't sound like its a healthy thing for you now. To be saying things like you want to kill yourself and torture her is quite shocking and in that state how are you ever going to have a good stable relationship. Slow down, take a deep breathe and think about YOU. I say this as someone who doesn't cope well with break ups / rejection. I've finally realised though that no matter how much I miss all the great things about having a man in my life I need to get myself to a place where I could cope well with and bounce back from a break up. Only then are you truly going to be able to enjoy the experience. For me this means increasing my circle of friends, working on my self confidence and living a little. I suggest working out what things would improve stuff for you.

 

[theSmokingRabbit]

I honestly don't want to cause offence but perhaps you need to stop looking for relationships right now and work on yourself and your own feelings. It really doesn't sound like its a healthy thing for you now. To be saying things like and want to kill yourself and torture her is quite shocking and in that state how are you ever going to have a good stable relationship. Slow down, take a deep breathe and think about YOU. I say this as someone who doesn't cope well with break ups / rejection. I've finally realised though that no matter how much I miss all the great things about having a man in my life I need to get myself to a place where I could cope well with and bounce back from a break up. Only then are you truly going to be able to enjoy the experience. For me this means increasing my circle of friends, working on my self confidence and living a little. I suggest working out what things would improve stuff for you.

+1

I would listen to the woman.

 

[VanillaCreme]

There is a reason. She's just not telling you.

 

[Vagrant Legacy]

I honestly don't want to cause offence but perhaps you need to stop looking for relationships right now and work on yourself and your own feelings. It really doesn't sound like its a healthy thing for you now. To be saying things like you want to kill yourself and torture her is quite shocking and in that state how are you ever going to have a good stable relationship. Slow down, take a deep breathe and think about YOU. I say this as someone who doesn't cope well with break ups / rejection. I've finally realised though that no matter how much I miss all the great things about having a man in my life I need to get myself to a place where I could cope well with and bounce back from a break up. Only then are you truly going to be able to enjoy the experience. For me this means increasing my circle of friends, working on my self confidence and living a little. I suggest working out what things would improve stuff for you.

Read this, and read it well

 

[Angelight]

I suppose it's best that I do take time off from all this. I have alot of other things I can focus on for now, love may come again but I wont let it in as fast next time. I'm going to take my time focusing on some leisure activities and get away from this all. Thank you everyone for talking to me. I appreciate it greatly. This truly has helped.

 

[IgnoredOne]

Its never terrible to have a girl or be looking for a girl - its a very natural part of being a man. But you do seem to have made it almost central to your life in some ways, and that's really not a safe thing. Its part of a larger being that is you, not the majority of it.

 

[septicemia]

If you are so attached to them after 2 weeks that you want to kill yourself, I would venture a guess that at the very least, you come on way too strong and freak them out.

 

[Angelight]

If you are so attached to them after 2 weeks that you want to kill yourself, I would venture a guess that at the very least, you come on way too strong and freak them out.

You know, that's actually a very funny thing. I don't really come on strong at all. I act as any old guy would. I just have had extremely bad luck in my past experiences and well, with all this happening it kinda saps a person of hope and joy.

 

[Sci-Fi]

Twice in a months time? I hope you aren't planning on taking her back, again. There's gotta be a reason, like Vanilla said, she just doesn't want to tell you. It could be nothing to do with you and to do with her. Some times people are suckered back with someone who may not have been the best thing for them, leaving the person who might be out in the cold and heartbroken.

I agree with some of the others here, put relationships aside for now and work on you.

 

[Sprint]

Well, got dumped again for absolutely no reason. Twice now I've had the sweet innocent girl I'm aiming for dump me for no reason, break my heart, and go back to her **** ex. And again, when I ask her why, she can't even give me an answer. What am I seriously doing wrong? I tried my very best to please her and I've done literally nothing to deserve this. But whether I deserve it or not, I'm still in serious pain. For this to happen two times in a row within about a month really does hurt and it makes me consider some lengthy extremes. From torturing her to killing myself, all the wounds that girls opened up again are making me really consider ending it all. I just can't get a break to save my life. I would really like to know what I'm doing wrong or how to fix this so hopefully I don't end up doing something stupid.

It's always the ex... I know the type. This reveals though, that you're going after the same type repeatedly. "The girl with the ex" type. Why? Ok, let's explore the main characteristic of this girl...

She's emotionally unavailable.

Right, most girls have an ex... but before you're allowing yourself to become emotionally attached... are you making sure that ex is long enough ago for her to have moved on? If you're not (which it doesn't seem you are) then you are purposefully going after females who are emotionally unavailable.

This may be a matter of convenience.... yet you are not realizing what you're doing.
You become attached (supposedly) very quickly to them. You're not really attached to them though... it's too early. You're attaching to something else. This something else you have to discover what it is. In this situation it's usually a void you're trying to fill ... using the female(s). It will not work. You need to find out how to fill this void inside of yourself in more productive ways.

Once you do that... you will no longer be attracted to emotionally unavailable females.