small question

[man of one]

So i'm attracted to this girl from college, I have gotten a few classes with her the last couple of semesters, but never talked to her until last april. We talked about class stuff, but didn't exchange names or anything. The next semester came up(august-december) and my shyness and social anxiety kicks in and i don't go and say hi or anything when we see each other, though she doesn't really acknowledge me either probably because we barely talked when we did in april..That semester we didn't have any classes together also which made it harder to talk to her. I saw her in the hallways, but didn't approach cause i didn't know what to say. Alot of times we saw each other but i kept walking like if i have never even had a convo with her, which makes what is in the next paragraph a little awkward.

I found her on Facebook and don't know if to add her, it would appear weird to her that the serious guy she sees in college and doesn't even know just now wanted to add her. I also don't like having my face in the profile pic so if she doesn't know my name she won't even recognize me..What do you guys suggest I do? should i add her now? or wait till i get to know her better later on?..what would the girls here think if it was you in her shoes?

 

[ReaderGuy]

I would definitely try to talk to her first. I mean, if you add her now wouldn't you still have the intention of talking to her in person after you added her? There's no point in adding her now ( and possible have your request rejected) if you want to get to know her anyway.

So just talk to her first, then add.

As a side note, I actually did this to a girl I had known in middle school way back. I had a crush on her for like 2 years, and yet I not once talked to her on my own...the only time was in a class when we had to do a quick assignment one day. I wish I had had enough courage (i still probably dont haha). So two years later, as a sophmore in high school, I decided to add her on facebook. She actually added me, but I still have never talked to her! I guess I still find it comforting that she is still my "friend" on facebook, as weird as that sounds.

Facebook shouldnt be the way you get to know someone, especially when you can talk to them in front of you.

 

[duff]

So i'm attracted to this girl from college, I have gotten a few classes with her the last couple of semesters, but never talked to her until last april. We talked about class stuff, but didn't exchange names or anything. The next semester came up(august-december) and my shyness and social anxiety kicks in and i don't go and say hi or anything when we see each other, though she doesn't really acknowledge me either probably because we barely talked when we did in april..That semester we didn't have any classes together also which made it harder to talk to her. I saw her in the hallways, but didn't approach cause i didn't know what to say. Alot of times we saw each other but i kept walking like if i have never even had a convo with her, which makes what is in the next paragraph a little awkward.

I found her on Facebook and don't know if to add her, it would appear weird to her that the serious guy she sees in college and doesn't even know just now wanted to add her. I also don't like having my face in the profile pic so if she doesn't know my name she won't even recognize me..What do you guys suggest I do? should i add her now? or wait till i get to know her better later on?..what would the girls here think if it was you in her shoes?

add her but also write a message saying who you are and how you know her. What's the worst that can happen ? She doesn't add you ? Even if that happens, it could be something to talk about when you see her next ?

 

[JustALonelyGuy]

Try and tlak to her. Ask her if she remmbers you and if she does, ask her how everythings goin on with her reardin her studies etc. Just be yourself and see how it goes. Try your best and tell her your name etc. its ahrd but ocne you have established this, thins just might go somewhere

 

[man of one]

Much thanks for the encouraging words and advice, I think i'm inclining more into adding her now since if it goes well I can talk to her there and later when we meet irl it will be easier..I will keep you guys posted I'll add her tonight and see what happens stayed tune haha..I have to activate my courage mode for something as stupid as adding a girl on FB lol Christ..

 

[JustALonelyGuy]

Sending you my thoughts of courage. Beleve and affirm to yourself that you can do it. Remember, no matter how hard it is for alot of us to remember, that YOU are in control of your destiny. You can be your own hero or worst enemy as I have learnt an I am still learning. Keep in mind that even if you choose not to go through with it, your reasons are yours and yours alone. Oppurtunity is infinate and always rears its head one way or another and through diffferent people and situations

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Oh and best wishes!

 

[man of one]

Sending you my thoughts of courage. Beleve and affirm to yourself that you can do it. Remember, no matter how hard it is for alot of us to remember, that YOU are in control of your destiny. You can be your own hero or worst enemy as I have learnt an I am still learning. Keep in mind that even if you choose not to go through with it, your reasons are yours and yours alone. Oppurtunity is infinate and always rears its head one way or another and through diffferent people and situations

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Oh and best wishes!

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Thanks man great words, really needed that..I wish you the best in your life as well.

 

[simplesimonette]

I don't see a problem adding her now, with a reminder of who you are and how you know her. I think that with a different avenue of communication, especially with your computer being a buffer, you might be more comfortable with developing some sort of relationship with her.
I've seen people adding friends with less concrete reasons than what you're proposing, so I can't see how she could interpret it in a negative way. Worse case scenario she doesn't accept your friend request and with that you can't lose something you never had in the first place.
Good luck.

 

[WallflowerGirl83]

Yeah talk to her. I remember I was the same way when I was younger. And kept everything in, now I'm pretty open but I still get my shy moments. You never know what could happen. Wish you luck!