S
serpentish
Guest
Well, lets see. Where to start? I guess when I started to feel lonely. Well, the first time that happened was a long time ago, about a decade ago. Not really relevant, but still.
Middle school was the first time I had to face lonelines and the reality of fleeting friendships. I've always been the type to have a few friends I like to keep close. In middle scool though, my friends found other friends and therefore my time with them was smaller to accomodate the new people. I never made my own share of new friends and basically was by myself very often. I had social skills of a wild rock and wit to match. I had to learn and adapt how to be social and charismatic. That wasn't easy at all and it basically involved watching kids with many friends, copying and altering their habits to make them my own. Either way, I got over it.
Now, I'm in my last year of college with a whole new problem, love based. Typically it sounds ridiculous when a 22 year old like myself or younger says they've fallen in love with somebody but I'm not sure how getting older would somehow educate me on how to know when I'm in love. I basically found a girl who, I slowly began to realize, I could spend the rest of my life with. Things just clicked and I thought they did for her too. After a long ordeal I'm pretty sure she doesn't feel the same way and wants to just leave our relationship at friendship. To be honest, it breaks my heart. I'm sure at some point I'll move on but it's not easy, it sucks and I wish it had never happened. So here I am, in a forum about loneliness because this issue has caused at least the past 2-3 months to be my most depressive since middle school.
I'm sorry if this was too long, it could have been longer, but I felt it summed up the "loneliness hilights" of my life.
Middle school was the first time I had to face lonelines and the reality of fleeting friendships. I've always been the type to have a few friends I like to keep close. In middle scool though, my friends found other friends and therefore my time with them was smaller to accomodate the new people. I never made my own share of new friends and basically was by myself very often. I had social skills of a wild rock and wit to match. I had to learn and adapt how to be social and charismatic. That wasn't easy at all and it basically involved watching kids with many friends, copying and altering their habits to make them my own. Either way, I got over it.
Now, I'm in my last year of college with a whole new problem, love based. Typically it sounds ridiculous when a 22 year old like myself or younger says they've fallen in love with somebody but I'm not sure how getting older would somehow educate me on how to know when I'm in love. I basically found a girl who, I slowly began to realize, I could spend the rest of my life with. Things just clicked and I thought they did for her too. After a long ordeal I'm pretty sure she doesn't feel the same way and wants to just leave our relationship at friendship. To be honest, it breaks my heart. I'm sure at some point I'll move on but it's not easy, it sucks and I wish it had never happened. So here I am, in a forum about loneliness because this issue has caused at least the past 2-3 months to be my most depressive since middle school.
I'm sorry if this was too long, it could have been longer, but I felt it summed up the "loneliness hilights" of my life.