Hooraytio
New member
I don't know if this is a good idea or not. I suppose I'll find out. Here's what's up:
I'm lonely. I think most people are. There're a lot of people and not nearly enough people to be invested in all those people. Unsurprisingly, I tend to think I'm special, in that I'm inclined to think of my loneliness in relation to the broad undercurrent of loneliness I perceive in the world and, as such, am inclined to dismiss my own loneliness as being of no greater importance than that of those around me, and to suppress it in favor of making an effort to put others at their ease whenever I can.
This isn't working out that well for me.
I work in customer service, and part of the reason I stay in it (despite the fact that I hatehatehate it) is that I feel like one positive interaction with a person in the course of a day could make one person feel a little less shitty and closed-off. I think of loneliness (like fear) as pain, and I think pain is the only reason people intentionally hurt other people, so if I can starve the surfeit of human suffering even a little bit I might be doing some real good.
In the meantime...
I have a girlfriend. She's lived with me for a long, long time, and she has no apparent interest in changing that arrangement. She doesn't always understand me, but she always tries. Despite this, I am lonely. Part of it is that I don't have any friends, bar one guy who we hang out with a couple of times a week or so and who doesn't have any interest in discussing anything of more significance than TV or honeysuckle movies. I'm into music and comedy, and I don't know anybody who wants to do anything with either of these, including the girlfriend. I want to create, but I can't seem to do it by myself, and I end up resenting people who have these interests but still pursue a doctorate in anthropology.
Summary: lonely at the job I hate, lonely with the girl I love, lonely in a social pool that seems to have no interest in me or what I want to do.
I'm painting in dark colors and broad strokes here - there are nuances, but I can't/won't articulate them here and now. Besides, this is all meant to be by way of introduction, yes? Here I am. I'll probably see you around. I will try very hard not to be a colossal dick.
I'm lonely. I think most people are. There're a lot of people and not nearly enough people to be invested in all those people. Unsurprisingly, I tend to think I'm special, in that I'm inclined to think of my loneliness in relation to the broad undercurrent of loneliness I perceive in the world and, as such, am inclined to dismiss my own loneliness as being of no greater importance than that of those around me, and to suppress it in favor of making an effort to put others at their ease whenever I can.
This isn't working out that well for me.
I work in customer service, and part of the reason I stay in it (despite the fact that I hatehatehate it) is that I feel like one positive interaction with a person in the course of a day could make one person feel a little less shitty and closed-off. I think of loneliness (like fear) as pain, and I think pain is the only reason people intentionally hurt other people, so if I can starve the surfeit of human suffering even a little bit I might be doing some real good.
In the meantime...
I have a girlfriend. She's lived with me for a long, long time, and she has no apparent interest in changing that arrangement. She doesn't always understand me, but she always tries. Despite this, I am lonely. Part of it is that I don't have any friends, bar one guy who we hang out with a couple of times a week or so and who doesn't have any interest in discussing anything of more significance than TV or honeysuckle movies. I'm into music and comedy, and I don't know anybody who wants to do anything with either of these, including the girlfriend. I want to create, but I can't seem to do it by myself, and I end up resenting people who have these interests but still pursue a doctorate in anthropology.
Summary: lonely at the job I hate, lonely with the girl I love, lonely in a social pool that seems to have no interest in me or what I want to do.
I'm painting in dark colors and broad strokes here - there are nuances, but I can't/won't articulate them here and now. Besides, this is all meant to be by way of introduction, yes? Here I am. I'll probably see you around. I will try very hard not to be a colossal dick.
