nea_lin
New member
- Joined
- Mar 30, 2012
- Messages
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...that I could just wake up and be someone else.
The last quarter of my life has been rough. I lost both my parents and my only sister in an accident (it's a long story, and complicated), and now I'm alone. They were the only people I could ever really relate to. To say that I love them and miss them terribly is an understatement. Most days it hurts so bad that I wish I could just die.
It's been almost three years now, and I don't really talk to anyone about it. I've had the same job for about a year, and no one even knows about it. I don't trust people enough to tell them about it, because I'm scared they will see me differently or judge me. I also afraid of breaking down in front of anyone. Because of these reasons, I really keep to myself.
I also feel a lot of guilt over what happened, which I carry with me every day. Most days I hate myself and wish that I could just erase my memory and be somebody else. Most days I look in the mirror and see an ugly person who is really really bad. I feel like such a waste.
I'm not too sure what to do to help myself, so I thought I would try to reach out over the internet. It would be great if anyone has any suggestions on how to improve my situation.
The last quarter of my life has been rough. I lost both my parents and my only sister in an accident (it's a long story, and complicated), and now I'm alone. They were the only people I could ever really relate to. To say that I love them and miss them terribly is an understatement. Most days it hurts so bad that I wish I could just die.
It's been almost three years now, and I don't really talk to anyone about it. I've had the same job for about a year, and no one even knows about it. I don't trust people enough to tell them about it, because I'm scared they will see me differently or judge me. I also afraid of breaking down in front of anyone. Because of these reasons, I really keep to myself.
I also feel a lot of guilt over what happened, which I carry with me every day. Most days I hate myself and wish that I could just erase my memory and be somebody else. Most days I look in the mirror and see an ugly person who is really really bad. I feel like such a waste.
I'm not too sure what to do to help myself, so I thought I would try to reach out over the internet. It would be great if anyone has any suggestions on how to improve my situation.