The Green Monster Jealousy...

[Fray]

So I haven't been here in a long time... I was never a big presence here to begin with. But lately I guess I have found myself a little... down in the dumps and lonely. Now I have never really had a lot of friends in real life but still I have never really been that lonely. Over the years I have made a lot of really good friends online. We have talked almost daily and even exchanged numbers with a few. But lately... I guess I feel as though I'm sort of losing them.

My first friend (I'll go by her screen name Wolf) went out and got a boyfriend then sort of just vanished. Haven't seen or heard from her in months really... That actually can apply to two of them really...

Then another (Ash) is married... she has a few adopted children and is pregnant. She has her own life to live and I get it I do. I'm glad she has a life, even if I really don't.

Then there is Jinx and Sully... they met online and ended up meeting in real life and now that they are together... well I really just don't see them very much either. Sully has been making a little bit of a return but still... I miss them.

But honestly I was okay with all that I really was. Because it seemed like no matter what everyone else went through, who they found... I still had my best friend (Music). It was always me and her really. We talk, RP together, text... For years it has always just kind of been the two of us. No matter what went on with everyone else we still had each other so I was never lonely.

However recently she has met someone online and been talking to him a lot lately. Even invited him over to our private RP forum. Which I was okay with at first, I like meeting her other friends but lately it seems... well he's more than a friend. She seems to really like the guy and talks to him all the time and they flirt and everything. Now I want to be happy for her I really do, she's my best friend and she deserves happiness... but god all I can feel is jealousy! I feel like I'm loosing her I guess. Like its no longer me and her... it's her and him and I'm just a third wheel...

I confessed this to Sully one early morning after reading a chat between the two from the night before when I had been at work. And I guess he went and told Music... She insists I'm not losing her and I could never be replaced and she doesn't even know if things will go anywhere. But despite what anyone is telling me I can't shake this feeling! Like I'm getting left out and being left behind... everyone is out finding someone... And I'm stuck where I have always been. Shy and awkward. And for once alone...

I just dont know what to do... I want to be happy for her I do but I hate seeing her talking to this guy, hate seeing them flirt... I have come to hate it just having him mentioned in a conversation. I've never been jealous until now but... I am. </3

I guess it has just become easier ranting about it here among strangers than admitting it... again... to my friends.

 

[beautiful loser]

****, I thought this might have been about the Red Sox...oh well.

 

[cumulus.james]

Don't give in to jelousy. I think thats how come I lost my friends. What good will beting yourself up do?

Focus on fixing your lonliness. Use it as inspiration? Say to yourself "I would like that, how do I get it?"

 

[Mr Seal The Albatros]

Don't give in to jelousy. I think thats how come I lost my friends. What good will beting yourself up do?

Focus on fixing your lonliness. Use it as inspiration? Say to yourself "I would like that, how do I get it?"

^^ This.

I think I know how you feel. I tend to feel this way a lot too. . Also, pardon me if this is a bit insulting, but could it be you're overthinking this? I tend to do this A LOT. *hugs*

 

[Tiina63]

Your feelings are perfectly normal and natural so don't feel guilty about feeling this way. But instead of letting jealousy overwhelm you, do what cumulus-james says. Maybe you could find someone as well.

 

[kamya]

But despite what anyone is telling me I can't shake this feeling! Like I'm getting left out and being left behind...

I wish I could be more optimistic here but I also feel like this probably is what's happening.

It'll be alright. People come and go.

 

[Fray]

Thanks for the advice I suppose. I don't want to be jealous I really don't, but I couldn't help it. Don't seem to have much reason to be anymore though she says she's getting over him and it was just a dumb crush. He wasn't good for her anyway. And yet even with her relationship with this guy coming to an end and things back to normal basically... I find I am still feeling rather alone I guess. :/

 

[ladyforsaken]

I can understand the jealousy... it's not easy to curb the jealousy, neither is it possible to stop it entirely. Just like how you can't force emotions or feelings in any way. I don't have a good solution for you but all I ever did to help get through situations like these, were to keep myself occupied and busy as much as I can. It helped some. Good luck, Fray.

 

[Seeker_2.0]

People nowadays have learned to conceal their problems outside the confides of their house and immediate family, many people don't even confide their problems to their closest friends either. What I'm getting at is that, although your friends seem to be happy with their lives and naturally cause you to get jealous, it doesn't mean that all is rosy in their new families. Everyone has problems.