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PurpleMist said:
I've been thinking about this as well. Up until six months ago I lived just outside Sydney. Even if I'm very far away now, it still felt close to home.

This made me think about the horrific thing that happened here in Norway 22. July 2011. So many poor people gone. We called it terrorism, And the perpetrator was a norwegian man.

If you don't mind my asking, whereabouts just outside Sydney? Obviously as a Canberran I'm quite familiar with the city and its surrounding areas.

I guess it's still surreal because again, it hits right at home -- I've been there, to Martin Place and the cafè -- and yet doesn't at the same time. Despite having been there I still associate Martin Place as being somewhere on TV, thanks to Sunrise and etc., similarly to all these places around the world that I hear about all the time but have never experienced myself. I guess my mind is playing tricks on me, a little bit. It's interesting but yeah, just... Eh.

May it never happen ever again. Here and globally.
 
Feeling sorry for myself this evening, I am tired, in pain, my list of things to do feels never ending, its not like its Christmas things, that's all sorted really. Just sick of doing all the thankless tasks and being exhausted, and then some twonk has to nitpick. No rest for the wicked, I must have been pretty bad!
 
She-ra said:
Feeling sorry for myself this evening, I am tired, in pain, my list of things to do feels never ending, its not like its Christmas things, that's all sorted really. Just sick of doing all the thankless tasks and being exhausted, and then some twonk has to nitpick. No rest for the wicked, I must have been pretty bad!

"twonk"
I love that. :D

(((hugs)))
 
She-ra said:
Feeling sorry for myself this evening, I am tired, in pain, my list of things to do feels never ending, its not like its Christmas things, that's all sorted really. Just sick of doing all the thankless tasks and being exhausted, and then some twonk has to nitpick. No rest for the wicked, I must have been pretty bad!

Chin up, Mistress. Just do what I do and manufacture a superiority complex that allows you to to just smile and nod at the 'twonks' ;)

It'll be Christmas soon and you can sit with your feet up and order the commoners to feed you grapes or something...
 
She-ra said:
Feeling sorry for myself this evening, I am tired, in pain, my list of things to do feels never ending, its not like its Christmas things, that's all sorted really. Just sick of doing all the thankless tasks and being exhausted, and then some twonk has to nitpick. No rest for the wicked, I must have been pretty bad!

Sending some hugs your way. *tackle hugs She-ra*
 
SophiaGrace said:
Mr Seal The Albatros said:
Whenever I look on my news feed on FB, I always come across at least one photo where a friend of mine is with another friend.
I may be whining a bit, but it never ceases to make me feel like I've been a bad friend or that I don't have any at all whenever I see one.

You have friends here though Mr. Seal

:)

Agreed. We're here. :)
 
Too worn out to even attempt to socialize with other human beings. Maybe I'll go see The Hobbit alone this weekend. Better than having more people flee.
 
I can't remember what it was like to feel those butterflies fluttering in my tummy. I think those butterflies have either flown away or died...
 
ladyforsaken said:
I can't remember what it was like to feel those butterflies fluttering in my tummy. I think those butterflies have either flown away or died...

The thing about butterflies: they may only be in your life for the smallest amount of time, surprising you while there before leaving never to be seen again, but you can always rely on more to come. It could be today, it could be tomorrow, it could be a month or year away, but butterflies will always come when you least expect it, and when they do it's beautiful.

I may be talking about real butterflies here but I think it applies to those figurative ones you mention as well. You're right in that you'll probably never see the ones you've seen before again (in other words, what gave you them in the past probably won't again), but you will always see others. Usually when you least expect to (a bit like rainbows, then).

Food for thought, at least.
 
Civol said:
ladyforsaken said:
I can't remember what it was like to feel those butterflies fluttering in my tummy. I think those butterflies have either flown away or died...

The thing about butterflies: they may only be in your life for the smallest amount of time, surprising you while there before leaving never to be seen again, but you can always rely on more to come. It could be today, it could be tomorrow, it could be a month or year away, but butterflies will always come when you least expect it, and when they do it's beautiful.

I may be talking about real butterflies here but I think it applies to those figurative ones you mention as well. You're right in that you'll probably never see the ones you've seen before again (in other words, what gave you them in the past probably won't again), but you will always see others. Usually when you least expect to (a bit like rainbows, then).

Food for thought, at least.

I totally understand this, thank you.

It's just that I've been numbed for some time now that when some people flatter me, I don't feel anything, unlike before when I'd feel those butterflies or some feeling or emotion. That's kinda what I meant really..
 
ladyforsaken said:
SophiaGrace said:
Mr Seal The Albatros said:
Whenever I look on my news feed on FB, I always come across at least one photo where a friend of mine is with another friend.
I may be whining a bit, but it never ceases to make me feel like I've been a bad friend or that I don't have any at all whenever I see one.

You have friends here though Mr. Seal

:)

Agreed. We're here. :)

Thanks guys. :)

ladyforsaken said:
I can't remember what it was like to feel those butterflies fluttering in my tummy. I think those butterflies have either flown away or died...

*hugs*
 
ladyforsaken said:
It's just that I've been numbed for some time now that when some people flatter me, I don't feel anything, unlike before when I'd feel those butterflies or some feeling or emotion. That's kinda what I meant really..

And I understand this. Perhaps you felt nothing because you were dealing with moths instead of butterflies (in other words, they weren't the right people so their flattery, etc., wasn't what you were looking for)?

Okay I'll stop with the analogy, especially as I'm still new here and don't know you, but again it's food for thought. The beauty of butterflies (real and the ones you feel) is in their sudden arrival, their unexpectedness. They get to you in part because you never see them coming. So, if you've not experienced them in a while and feel numb as a result, it could be because you just haven't come across them in a while. But it doesn't mean they won't come.
 
I think after 16 years this woman at work has finally forgiven me.
In 1998 I upset her, didn't mean to. I said 'sorry' but it didn't seem to do any good.
We then went thru a difficult decade were some days we would talk and others we wouldn't.
We would spend 6 months not talking over nothing.
In about 2002 I stopped caring and stopped thinking about her or wondering what to do to make things better.
I saw her today, she has been off ill. We spent most of the day talking, catching up on stuff. We both like football.
I know she could be cold with me tomorrow, she could not look me in the eye or not talk. For no reason as well. She is like that.
I do sometimes wonder if we both like each other and are scared to admit it. We could work another 20 years together. We might get to 65 and then admit it to each other when I leave.
All those lost years ! She is single by the way.
 
Civol said:
ladyforsaken said:
It's just that I've been numbed for some time now that when some people flatter me, I don't feel anything, unlike before when I'd feel those butterflies or some feeling or emotion. That's kinda what I meant really..

And I understand this. Perhaps you felt nothing because you were dealing with moths instead of butterflies (in other words, they weren't the right people so their flattery, etc., wasn't what you were looking for)?

Okay I'll stop with the analogy, especially as I'm still new here and don't know you, but again it's food for thought. The beauty of butterflies (real and the ones you feel) is in their sudden arrival, their unexpectedness. They get to you in part because you never see them coming. So, if you've not experienced them in a while and feel numb as a result, it could be because you just haven't come across them in a while. But it doesn't mean they won't come.

Thanks Civol, I hear you. And I fully appreciate your reply. :)
 
I really don't want my life to be like this. I know I have to change my WHOLE life and change myself and everything. My current life is making me seriously unhappy and depressed. Is this how life has to be? NO! But it's harder to change things when being lonely... And when feeling unmotivated. I need something, anything... New. New start, a fresh start. There's whole world waiting for me, I don't need to cry. No reason to cry, I can achieve anything. No reason to feel sad. I just need to believe in myself, it can't be that hard.
 

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