You Don't NEED People to "Live"

[Nightwatcher]

I must disagree with you.

First of you could divide loneliness into two kinds. Nourishing and debilitating loneliness, Nourishing loneliness is the ability as you describe to being able to thrive in your own company and enjoy your solitude from the world. But in order to experience this you need to have had atleast had some pleasant memory of a human relation. Otherwise its likely you will slip ower into debilitating loneliness. Debilitating loneliness comes with being angry and bitter and jeuolous or saddend. This is what most people think that loneliness leads to. Debilitating loneliness also creates this victim mentallity and works as an excuse for a selfcenterd lifestyle leading to further loneliness.

I must agree on you that you got it right that you at a period of your life can live in solitude. This as you alredy is at peace mentally with the concept of living alone and have experience with relations. This is somewhat of what is going on with hermits at least thats what i think. So in that sence you're right.

But (again) as i mentioned above you must in some part of your life had some contact with people in order to "live". This as you otherwise would miss the beuty. This because you would be busy with being saddend bitter or jeulous and miss the beuty of life.

 

[Badjedidude]

^^^Yay for Maslow's Heirarchy!

I agree with it.

 

[Enchanted Girl]

Maybe you guys misunderstood the premise of my thread. I wasn't so much advocating loneliness as I was promoting individuality and self-motivation. I've read a lot of posts saying that without people as in without close friends I cannot live. That is not true. What I meant was to go out and experience life and do what YOU want to do, you just need yourself, at least to get started. It is obvious that one must interact with society to survive, but I was more talking about the people who let there loneliness paralyze them.

As I said in another thread, I am not so much lonely as I am content with being in an absence of people.

This is good advice for people who have some enemies or a few people they like who don't return their feelings, but not for people who are truly alone. It makes you desperate.

Like I said, you haven't felt true isolation if you believe this with all your heart. True isolation makes you insane and desperate for ANYTHING. Even getting hit or abused because at least you're not alone anymore.

Some of happiness has to come from within, but to say it's totally separate from your surroundings is wrong. People can only take so much and still remain happy.

That being said, I do not believe in lonely people just giving up because giving up leads to suicide. They should still keep trying to find happiness, but I'm not going to turn up my nose at them and tell them to just be happy regardless and that if they don't act happy, they are at fault for letting their surroundings upset them. That's overly simplifying it.

 

[eris]

True isolation makes you insane and desperate for ANYTHING. Even getting hit or abused because at least you're not alone anymore.

I dont know if true isolation makes you despereate. I really went through hell, and about 3 years in my mid twenties I was totally alone, by choice. I said fresia you to everyone, and they deserved it. I didnt have good people in my life so bye bye. Of course I HAD to talk to some people. I was in school, but acknowledged no one. I visited prostitutes and said nothing to them. I did not once speak to any member of my family, and the few sentences that I did have to utter to others was not fun or nice or enjoyed at all, and at times spent a week or more totally alone.

But hovever, it DOES make you insane.

I had a lot of mental and personal issues and at the very end of '06 I woke up.

I woke up and then I got better

So, believe me, I know what it is like to be alone and not lonely and I also know what it is like to be alone and very lonely.

But it does not make you desperate. That is a totally different choice.